I remember the day when it all started, though I suppose the story begins long before then. My colleagues and friends envied meI’d managed to win the affections of an older, successful man. Edward was fifteen years older than me and the managing director of the firm where I worked.
Shes only just started here and already shes set to be married, they whispered when they thought I couldnt hear.
From humble beginnings to the top, just like that.
It wasnt really like that at all. I hadnt wanted to flaunt my relationship with Edward. Truth be told, wed started seeing each other before I ever joined his company. Id had no clue he was the boss when I came for my interviewit all happened by chance. I got the job at once, though Edward always claimed he had nothing to do with it. HR handled it, he insisted, based on my experience and CV.
Of course, I eventually learned the truth, and I asked Edward to keep things quiet between us. But secrets, as we all know, rarely remain unspoken for long. Soon enough, every soul in the place knew about Edward and me. Even those who hardly knew us were eager to gossip about the widower and his young fiancée.
I never thought of myself as particularly beautiful; I believed Id earned my position through merit, not charm. The office gossips disagreed, of course.
Its not even been two years since Anna passed, and hes already thinking of marriage.
Anna Reynolds, Edwards late wife, had owned the company before him. Theyd been married a decade before she died in an accident, leaving him both the business and her estate.
At first, the other women saw him as an eligible widower. He seemed so lost after Annas death, withdrawn, always carrying an air of melancholy that seemed to make him even more appealing.
How loyal, they would sigh. Why, hes like a swan after all.
No one would have described Edward as a heartthrob. But he certainly had a healthy bank balance, and that was enough to capture plenty of attention. Still, I didnt fall for Edwards money. Nothing so calculated.
We met in the most ordinary way. Hed crashed into me with a trolley at the checkout in Sainsburystore my tights, scuffed my suede shoes, then blamed me for jumping the queue.
But Im not easily rattled. I gave as good as I got, and in the end he apologised, even insisted on paying for my shopping to make up for it, then dashed after me through the shopping centre to apologise once more.
Im so sorry, truly. I just had a dreadful day, he said. Can I carry your bags for you?
No thank you, I have my car here, Ill manage, I replied.
I didnt have a car, really. I simply waited around until he left, then made my way to the bus stop. Fateor coincidencemeant he saw me there, waiting for the number 12.
Hop in, he called from his car.
No thank you.
I shant go until you get in, Edward declared, blocking the kerb so that the others at the stop began urging me to just get in and clear the way.
In the end, I gave in.
Edward was quite charming when he wasnt shouting or running over feet with trolleys. I even thought that, in other circumstances, we could have been friends. But Edward wasnt after friendshiphe fell in love, despite believing, after Annas death, that hed never find another woman worth marrying. And there I was, different in looks and temperament, and yet I drew him in just the same.
He discovered where I lived and began turning up outside every day, waiting for me at the door. I finally agreed to go for dinner, and soon after, I ended up working at his firm. Coincidence? Perhaps.
Edward could scarcely care what the staff whispered behind our backs. He was happy, and didnt hide his feelings. He didnt shower me with gifts, but his attention was steady and unwavering.
I liked the way he treated me, and who could complain about his spacious flat in central London, the nice car, and the future he promised. Within weeks, Id moved my things in and met his mother, Julia Bennett.
Julia was a quiet woman who always deferred to her son. After Edwards wife died, hed moved his mother in. She cooked, ironed, kept housethere was always a hot meal and a pressed shirt.
When I appeared, Julia never stopped tending to the household. It didnt bother me. I had no desire to take over as lady of the house; I was more than happy to eat what Julia prepared. It was all smooth sailinguntil Edward decided to propose.
Yet, I found something troubling about how he still wore his wedding band months after Annas death.
I still feel connected to Anna, he admitted quietly. His continued attachment unsettled me, so I asked him to remove his ring.
All right, he said hesitantly. If it bothers you, Ill take it off.
Youre not married anymore, and with that ring on, it makes me feel as if Im seeing a married man, I explained. And so, he put it away andfor a while at leastforgot about it.
When it finally came time for him to propose, Edward brought out a little box from his safe. The setting was perfect: a romantic restaurant, live music, a glass of wineand at the bottom, an heirloom ring with an impressive diamond.
I nearly choked on my wine when I spotted that ring.
Will you marry me? Edward asked, ready to place the ring on my finger.
I pulled my hand away.
No.
His face fell. No? Why ever not?
Im not going to wear this ring, I replied.
Thats a family heirloom! Theres no other like it. You cant imagine what its worth!
I dont care. I wont wear something that belonged to your late wife.
Why not?
Its bad luck.
Dont be silly!
Would you like me to wear her dress as well? Your mother said its still in the wardrobe.
We could always buy a new dress. But it seems silly to buy new rings when these are unique heirlooms. Just look at the goldwork!
No, thank you. I dont want someone elses ring, and I dont want to see you wearing yours either. I nodded at his hand. You know how I feel.
Thats your final word? His brow furrowed.
Yes. Im sorry. I stood up, and the perfect evening crumbled.
Perhaps we should take a break, Edward suggested.
I think youre right.
I left, and he didnt stop me. The music carried on; the waiter brought our main course as the ring sat forgotten in its box.
Back at work, I did my best to steer clear of Edward. He seldom emerged from his office anyway. That evening, I went back to my parents place. They welcomed me warmly and gently urged me to call off the engagement and find someone my age.
Youre a clever, lovely girl. Why tie yourself to Edward? Hes so much older than youa widower at that, Mum said.
I had no answer. Edward ticked so many boxes for a husband, but his reluctance to let go of Annaand the pastdeeply unsettled me.
Days blurred together in that uncertain sort of way. Edward didnt call, and I kept my distance, eventually taking sick leave when I felt unwell. Rumours swirled around the office that the boss and his favourite had split. Edward hardly hid his mood, scowling and snapping at staff, even his mother.
One afternoon, Julia approached me herself.
Julia Bennett? I was surprised to see her at my door.
Hello, Maisie. How are you feeling?
Im all right. Just a bit under the weather.
Is that why youre living apart? So you dont infect me? she asked, raising an eyebrow.
Not exactly, I blushed.
Well, come home. Edwards useless without you.
He doesnt show it.
Hes proud, thats the trouble. He wont even tell me whats happened. Whats come between you two? You do love each other, dont you?
He wants me to wear a ring that belonged to his late wife.
Oh, I see. So, if not for the ring, everything would be fine?
I just wish hed let it gosell it, or buy something new. I cant bear the thought of wearing what another woman wore. Stones keep their energy, you know.
I agree, Maisie. I think Edwards just not ready for marriage. Hes still holding on to Anna, even though he cares for you deeply, Julia admitted.
You cant build something new on old foundations, Julia. Im sorry. Thank you for coming.
Julia left, looking sad. I felt the bitterness of our trivial disagreement, but beneath it, I sensed something bigger was wrong.
A week later my sick leave was up. The thought of facing Edward or the office drained me, especially after all the silence. So, I handed in my notice, determined to move on.
Edward signed my resignation without a word, only sitting behind his desk, looking like a sulky schoolboy.
Really, youre a grown man, Edward. Stop acting like a child, I said as I left.
You started this! No ones ever told me no before…
There was nothing left to say. As I walked out, I glimpsed the old ring still on his finger as he signed the paper. It sparkled coldly under the office lights.
Ive made the right choice, I thought, gathering my things. Hell never let his wife go.
It was only then that a strange peace settled in me. I knew Id done the right thing, even if it hurt. As for Edward, he spent a good while afterward brooding in silence, never understanding why I couldnt simply accept both him and the past that still haunted him.
If theres one lesson Ive carried away from it all, its this: you cant build a future while clinging to the shadows of yesterday. Sometimes what you leave behind is more important than what you walk toward.
