I married a divorcee, but I was not a divorcee. I met him when he was already living separately before the divorce, renting an apartment from a relative of mine when he left his wife. I went to that apartment to pick up the rent payment (I was asked). We started communicating, fell in love with each other and after six months of meeting, we applied for marriage and started living in my apartment.
My husband warned me right away that he loved his daughter very much and took her on weekends whenever possible. He didn’t get along with his wife from the very beginning, and after the birth of the child her character deteriorated. At first she just “dissolved” into her daughter and paid no attention to her husband, and then the scandals began. Everything was wrong for her, no matter what her husband did. When his wife started discussing him rudely among his relatives and tried to make him a wimp, my husband couldn’t stand it and filed for divorce.
And I didn’t have a family yet, only short-lived affairs. I was not lucky, though I was pretty, and my figure was all right, and my character was soft. My husband tells me that it is quiet and cozy with me, after his previous marriage he just enjoys the peace of the house. And his ex-wife can’t find room for herself, she expected her husband to suffer after the divorce and ask him back, but he took and married me. She couldn’t stand it and now she’s obviously turning her daughter against me.
My husband after the divorce took his daughter (she is 8 years old) and took her to the movies, to an entertainment center or a children’s cafe, and before we got married he took her to a rented apartment. I saw her during that time, but didn’t really communicate with her. Why would I want someone else’s girl? But after we got married my husband started taking her to our house. The first time I was worried, I baked some apple pies, and she refused to eat them, saying: “Ew.” But I still try to make contact with her, but she says to me, “You’re bad. You took my dad away from us. I explain that’s not true, but she sits there pouting. This conversation was without my husband, and when I told him, he said that I needed to make contact with her, because she was his daughter.
The next meetings in general pissed me off, though I restrained myself. I accidentally put my hand on the girl’s shoulder, and she pulled away, shivering squeamishly, and told me what she thought of me in a rude way. That’s when my father isn’t around and she ignores me in front of him and whispers something bad about me in my husband’s ear and my husband frowns. It was just the time of the pandemic, no place to go, so we stayed home. I was throwing up as soon as Saturday came around. I had the impression that my ex-wife was sending this obnoxious child to us on purpose, so he would destroy everything from the inside. True, she does not stay overnight with us, her husband takes her either on Saturday or Sunday.
Now school has started, which makes me happy, she has some other club on Saturdays. I can not see her, in principle, as she me. With my husband, we have almost begun to fight over his daughter. He defends her, and I ask my husband not to take her to us, because she hates me, she was brought up badly, her mother sets her up that way. And my husband says that I just have no experience with children, so his daughter and I don’t get along.
I’m afraid it’s all coming down to us getting a divorce, my ex-wife’s plan is starting to work. I’m also sure that because of the daughter, he will then go back to his ex-wife.
But I do not want to ruin the family. What can be done in this case?
