I got married five years ago. My husband and I loved each other madly. Married not because of pregnancy, pregnancy happened later and very long awaited and planned. We are 35 years old, not children for a long time.
Now our daughter is 2 years old. We have never been particularly poor, both worked, our own apartment, 2 cars. I have been working all the pregnancy with thrombophilia as a complication, I refused to be hospitalized for preservation. I wanted to keep my job after the maternity leave.
I gave birth and a month later I was back at work. My husband insisted on going back to work so quickly. Said I was proud of such a successful wife (I was promoted to department head) and my daughter will grow up and be proud.
My husband also works, makes good money. He has his own business. During my pregnancy he had some serious difficulties, I started to help and somehow it turned out that I now work on a regular basis at my job and his business. Plus I was invited to teach at the institute, where I studied for a few hours a week. But also the load – plans, lecture notes, practicals, checking papers and other stuff.
I am not complaining. I like working. But six months ago my husband had friends – a married couple our age. He has no education, no work experience, gently and smoothly attached to her husband in the business assistant, performs duties as a call center specialist, earns as a deputy director. Sings dithyrambs to my husband about how awesome he is, my friend’s wife sings along.
As a result, we had quarrels that I, coming home from work (at 6 pm), sit down at the computer (to do my husband’s work), and the neighbors (those same friends) have pies-first, second, third and compote! And their house is perfectly clean, while mine is a mess. It’s true, I do not deny it, but I work three jobs actually, I have no time or energy. And every day, my husband from 9 to 5, after listening to the recommendations of friends, meets me with reproaches! If before he was happy with everything, we discussed everything, but now they are the closest people, and I am a bad hostess, bad mother and bad wife.
I talked to him, I said: “let me quit, let me keep at least one job instead of three, and then I’ll have enough time for the house.” He disagreed. He spends all his free time with these friends. On weekdays they are together from 9 am to 5 pm and texting in the evening, on social media with pictures and memes all the way to midnight.
I tried to talk to him about it, he doesn’t want to hear me, it’s all my fault. My friends are smiling into my eyes, saying, “We love you. How do I know that they turn him against me? I saw the messages on social networks (I’m sorry, I peeked). Why are they doing this? I can only speculate. The friend is stupid, but ambitious. He wants to become a director, manage the team and make a lot of money (and my husband will just remain a founder). I object. I work in their own firm. The friend doesn’t know anything about it. I am afraid that he will simply destroy the business with his unsupported ambition.
I love my husband, my daughter loves him madly, I do not want to destroy the family, I do not want our daughter to grow up without a father. But every day to listen to the reproaches from my husband, who is on the account of these pseudo-friends, who decided to improve their financial situation at his expense, I also can’t stand it anymore.
How can I be? How to save the family? Find a common language with my husband?
