Molly, are you ready yet? Im going to be late for school! Ella shook out her brother Harrys last shirt, pegged it on the line that stretched across the draughty balcony, and wiped her hands on her jeans. Despite the peeling paint and the chilly wind that always found its way through, it was Ellas favourite place in their London flat.
She paused at the iron railings, letting her gaze drift over the Thames in the early morning gold. From the seventh floor, everything looked washed in sunlight, the promise of a brand-new spring day laid out before her. Ella squinted against the brightness and gripped the railing, heart full with that fierce sense of hope that sometimes flares uplife is brilliant, everything is possible, and it almost hurts to look at how bright the world can be! All she had to do was get through her to-do list, and it would happen, just the way she wanted.
Clouds drifted in front of the sun, and instantly, the world sharpened into its ordinary shapes. That was how it always went: dreams first, then reality slipped in. Her friend Alice always said, Realitys what you make of itits up to you what it becomes. Maybe she was right. Alice was clever. Had her law degree and everything. She kept insisting Ella could make it into university if she set her heart on it. The real question was, did she want to? Wanting wasnt enoughshe had to be sure. With her dad struggling on his own and her siblings so young, reality meant money was tight. For Ella, that probably meant choosing between going to university and getting a job. And right now, the only real option seemed to be finding work to help her dad.
She checked the little watch her father gave her in Year 3 and gaspedthey were going to be late. She grabbed the empty basket and hurried back inside.
Molly, curled into her pillow, slept so soundly that Ella couldnt help smiling, taking in her sisters wild tangle of blonde curls and impossibly long lashes. Ella never wanted to cut Mollys hair, despite the endless tangles. Their mum had curls like that, once. Ella frownedthinking about her mum brought a painful knot. Some things you could forgive in a person, but not betrayal. Mum had abandoned them when Molly was just a baby. Molly remembered nothing; shed even called Ella Mummy at first, which had once earned Ella some odd looks at the park. Ella grinned now, remembering the first time the local mums had ganged up on her.
Theyd moved into this flat after Gran passed away and left the place to Dad. Their previous two-bed felt like a shoebox for all of them, so moving into Grans four-bed was a relief.
Gran always seemed strict and distantshed been a university professor, rarely talking to the neighbours. To Gran, neighbours were dull and never worth her time. When Ella was younger, she hadnt really understood; later, she made herself visit Gran less often, helping when she had to but steeling herself for Grans sharp words.
Youre just like your mother. If theres any chance of you turning out alright, itll be thanks to our family genes. Though with your fathers side, Im not convinced. The only thing to save you is education. Study, or youll end up just like your mum.
What could Ella say to that? Gran never listened to disagreements anyway. Dad never scolded Ella when Gran rung with a complaint, but seeing his face darken and shut down for the rest of the daythat was its own punishment. So Ella kept quiet, got on with the chores, and dashed out the minute she was done. Only once had she ever lost patience and yelled back, and she swore never to feel guilty for it.
Your siblings probably arent even your fathers. Theyre nothing to do with me! Dont you dare mention them in this house, is that clear?
Then neither will I be in this house! Ella clenched her fists, refusing to back down. The shock on Grans face said enoughElla had been ready to throw every porcelain figurine off the shelf, those awful things she spent hours dusting under Grans glare. Gran refused to let the younger kids into her flat, said the porcelain was too precious… and, well, they werent her grandchildren anyway.
I wont come back! Ella had stormed out, yanked on her coat, and run all the way home. Molly was still in her playpen, and Ella scooped her up, tears streaming.
Youre my family, and so is Harry. We belong together, whatever anyone says. We dont need anyone else!
Dad poked his head out of the bathroom, surprise on his face at the sight of his eldest sobbing in the middle of the room. Molly looked up at Ella, then started crying even louder. Harry wandered in after homework in the kitchen and shrugged at Dad.
Whats up with them?
No idea.
Girls! Harry rolled his eyes, bundled up both sisters, and announced, Are you coming for dinner? Dad and I made spaghetti.
Gran called an hour later. Ella carefully set down her half-washed dish and shut off the tap. Dads voice in the next room went from surprised, to sharp, to fully angry. Ella curled up on her chair, bracing for the storm.
But the storm never came. Dad walked into the kitchen later, hugged her close, kissed the top of her head and said, You dont have to see Gran anymore.
Why?
Because no onerelative or notgets to insult you or your loved ones. Thats final.
Ella pressed against her father, relieved. At last, the weight of endless criticism was gone. Now she could just look after her siblings and focus on her own life.
Gran passed away a year and a half later. In the final months, after a hospital visit with Dad, Ella began seeing her again. Gran barely looked like herselfsmall, frail in a hospital bed, but the sharp tongue remained. Ella started coming every morning, as her schedule allowed. The nurses were grateful to have her there as a peacekeeper. Her presence seemed to calm Gran down, helping everyone get on with their work.
Youre a remarkable girl, the head nurse would say, squeezing her shoulder. But try not to hold a grudge, love. People who are poor in heart never find happiness. Sad when the lesson of a life isnt even learnt in the end.
On Ellas last morning with Gran, the elderly woman was uncharacteristically quiet, eyes on the grey sky. Ella packed away her homework and stood to leave.
I have to go
Ella Im sorry, for everything. Its all been a waste, really… Look after your father.
Ella nodded, kissed Gran softly on the cheek, and left. She didnt look back until she reached the door, then hurried onalmost late for school.
That same day, Gran passed away. Ella took her siblings to their room and quietly closed the door when Dad told them. Gran had been much harder for Ella than for her fatherand yet Gran was his mother. She listened for the sound of Dad weeping in the kitchen alone, knowing hed wipe away his tears and carry on, because that was just what he always did.
Moving into Grans flat was tough. Molly got ill, Harry went through a rebellious phase, and Dad was run off his feet. Ella packed endless boxes, half praying that somehow things would improve in their new home. She didnt even know who she was praying to, but she felt like someone was listening.
There, in the echo of their new rooms, each found their own corner of the world and started figuring out how to be a family again. At night, Molly often crept into Ellas bed, and Harry all but lived in the kitchen, sharing homework and chores with Ella.
Salt the spuds, will you? Ella was buried in physics revision.
Soups boiling, what now?
One sec! Ella set down her pen and started chopping veg.
I cant get my head round these negatives, Harry complained. Help?
Alright, show me.
Next to them, Molly scribbled determinedly in her sketchbookif the big kids did homework, so would she.
Those first months were rough. Dad worked double shifts, leaving Ella in charge. Harry was manageable; Molly, a challenge. Nursery helped, but Molly caught every bug going, and Ella ended up missing a lot of school. Things stayed that way until Alice came along.
Theyd met outside by chance. Ella took Molly to the playground, and as usual, the local mums and nannies watched everything with keen interest. Molly queued for the swings, but when it was finally her turn, her little voice rang out
Mum! The other women tutted and whispered.
Whispers grewwas Ella really the mother? Scandalous! So young!
Ella flushed, awkwardly trying to pull Molly away, but just then, a crisp voice cut through the chatter.
Whats going on here?
For a moment, Ella thought her Gran had come backthe authority in that voice was unmistakable. The crowd hushed.
Oh, Alice, youre here! Someone welcomed her, and Alice quickly sized up the scene.
So, whats the problem? she asked, her steady gaze pinning the worst of the gossips.
An older lady stepped forward. Honestly, Alice. Shes just a child, and shes raising a child? Its not right. Someone should deal with this. Children raising children! The poor girl needs the authorities, not responsibility.
Is that all? Alice arched an eyebrow. The woman shrank back and left the playground in a flurry.
Shows over, ladies, Alice declared. Lets carry on. And you, whats your name?
Ella and this is Molly.
Good. Im Alice. Dont call me Miss, it makes me feel ancient. Just Alice.
Ella didnt know how it happened that Aliceten years older and thoroughly sortedbecame her friend. Some might say an unlikely pairing, but for Ella, it was exactly what she needed.
Everyone respected Alice. She was a family solicitor, sharp, professional, trusted with all the neighbours secrets.
Youve no idea how much I know, she laughed, as they changed curtains together. Thats why theyre warynobody wants their misdeeds known. People cant stand the thought of their nice reputations being tarnished when someone finds out what they really get up to.
Ella nodded. Her dad had moved them to this new area precisely because no one here knew why their mum had left.
Alice was the only one she confided in about her mother. Until then, Ella had just bottled things up. She hadnt realised how much anger and uncertainty she carriedor how scared she was of becoming like her mum.
One evening, Alice asked Ella to feed her cat.
I might be latecourt hearing and then the dentist. Just pop round, and dont forget him, or hell scream the house down all night.
Thats just a cat! Ella said, amused.
Oh, youd be surprised. Hell keep me up, pawing at me all night if hes put out.
Alice grinned, led Ella to the kitchen, where Tompkins, her massive tabby, lay snoring.
Watch this, Alice whispered. She shut the door and counted softly: One, two, three
A thump rattled the door, making Ella jump. Alice rolled her eyes. See? Hes stubborn. This place belongs to the cat, not me.
Eventually, after delays at school and the nursery, Ella arrived to feed Tompkins at nearly eight.
Sorry, pal! Got held up. She filled his bowl, just as the front door clicked open.
Ohits you. Alices shoulders drooped as she dropped her bag. She looked exhausted. To Ellas shock, Alice suddenly burst into tears.
Im sorry hard day, thats all. My mums gone, and theres no one else to talk to.
But youve got me! Ella said, squeezing Alices hand.
Alice wiped her face and managed a laugh. Curly hairI always wanted curls like yours, you know. Women always want what they havent got! I wanted curls and a child.
Alice went quiet. Curls can be done, but the other Not everyone gets that choice.
Ella, awkward but honest, pressed, Is there no chance? Are you sure?
Doctors say its almost impossible. A mistake in my twenties, an accident, and here we are. Sometimes your choices cost more than you realise. Remember that.
Alices story spilled out: how she and her husband Max had put off children for travel, careers, the perfect house. When she finally became pregnant, a scooter accident in Thailand changed everything. She woke up in hospital without the baby, nursing slow-healing injuries, and grief that shut Max out. They eventually divorced; it was only later that Alice saw how her pain blinded her to Maxs losses too. Years later, at a chance meeting, they reconnected as old friends, talking all night as if picking through the ruins together. Their bond returned, tentative, but Alice hesitated when Max asked again if shed marry him.
I cant do that to him she whispered, staring at her lap, He always wanted a big family.
Ella said, softly, Alice, even doctors arent always right. If theres a tiny chance, why not hope?
Maybe youre the wiser one after all, Alice smiled weakly, and set the kettle to boil.
Tell me your story, then, Alice said, stirring tea. You never talk about your mum How come its just you and your dad?
The evening light faded outside, and for the first time, Ella realised how even the hardest moments could soften when you shared them; that nobodys life was easy, and sometimes, carrying each others stories was the thing that truly made you family.
Because in the end, lifes lesson is this: you dont choose the family you are born into, but you do choose the family that you buildthrough kindness, understanding, and never walking away from the people that need you most.
