ODD NEIGHBOURS
New neighbours moved into flat 222, number 8, on Shakespeare Avenue. A married couple, both in their early fifties, on the slight and short side. He has a beard and always wears a grey overcoat. Shes often seen in a long skirt and a colourful hat. Theyre polite, always smiling in the lift, even holding the door if someones struggling with heavy shopping bags. And most importantly, compared to how new buildings are these daystheyre incredibly quiet.
Or so it seemed at first. About two weeks in, the Marshalls from 221 and the Bennetts from 223 started hearing them quite clearly. It became a bit of an evening topic around their dinner tables.
The Marshalls, both in their forties and married for half their lives, had this conversation:
Did you see those new neighbours?
Yeah, we were in the lift together yesterday.
What do you think?
Seem fine, just the usual, why?
Theyre rather amorous.
What do you mean?
When everyones out during the day, its suddenly so quiet in the building you can hear everythingand for the third day straight, theyre at it. Proper adult games.
Really?
Oh yes, and very imaginative too. Like a scene out of a film, honestly.
Well, thats something!
Youll hear it yourself at some point. Funny at first, but to be frank, its distracting. Hard to work from home!
Oh come on, dont be such a prude. Theyre in their fifties and still having fungood for them.
He didnt say aloud, but thought, Not like us, sadly.
On the weekend, I too became an unwilling listener to their escapades. This time it was the classic gardener and lady of the house routine. Even we found ourselves blushing.
*****
Meanwhile, the Bennetts, the youngest couple on the landingnearly thirty, married five years, expecting their first childwere chatting in their kitchen.
Tom, did you see the new couple?
Yeah, bumped into them at the entrance. What about them?
Theyre quite the pair! She cooks him these incredible meals, the hallway smells like a proper restaurant. And hes always bringing her giftsnever a day without something.
How do you know?
I go out for a walk every day. The smells from their door are heavenly. And Ive seen him with flowers, sometimes a gift baghe dashes home like hes off to a date.
Hm.
Do you reckon theyre not even married? Just lovers?
No idea pretty sure they live together though.
And you can hear them cooing in the kitchen if theyre not banging about the disheslaughing away like newlyweds.
Right. News is starting, Ill be in the lounge.
That Friday, Tom Bennett bumped into the neighbour by the lift. He was carrying flowers and a bottle of red, clearly looking forward to the evening.
*****
Time went on. The odd pair had been in flat 222 for a month already. The Marshalls in 221 had grown used to the sounds through the wall. The neighbours still seemed nowhere near finished with their games. Every day was something different: sweet sighs, the creak of a mattressliving each day as if it were their last, desperate not to waste a moment of each other.
One evening, Sarah Marshall looked away shyly and said,
I popped into the shopping centre today and wandered into the lingerie section. Look what I bought, she said, opening her dressing gown.
Michael Marshalls eyes lit up, and he absently ran his tongue along his lower lip.
I, er, stopped by that adult shop the other day. Picked something up, not sure if youll fancy it.
Well, you never know till you try, Sarah blushed.
*****
From the other side, the gentleman in 222 was at their shared wall, ear pressed up, whispering, Its started.
*****
Tom from 223 decided to take his lunch break at the jewellers. He realised itd been ages since he last surprised Emily with a gift. He used to delight her every week with somethingeven a bar of her favourite chocolate was always in his briefcase.
Unexpectedly, he recognised a familiar coat.
Emily! he called out. What brings you here? Its a bit of a trek from home.
Oh, just fancied a wander, she replied nervously. And you?
Picked out some earrings for you. Here.
Emilys face shone.
Thank you, love, she said, kissing him. I was thinking of making carbonara with prawns for dinnerthe way I used to. There are fantastic prawns here.
Oh, I remembermy mouths watering just thinking about it.
Dont be late today; Ill have dinner ready by seven and dont want to reheat it.
All right, said Tom, already making a mental note to buy her flowers.
*****
So, whats the latest? asked the woman from flat 222.
Hes cooking something exciting, the man grinned, and the others are well underway themselves.
*****
By another month, youd hardly recognise the Marshalls. They seemed ten years younger, always sneaking glances at each other, waiting for opportunities to be alone together. Occasionally, theyd ditch the kids, get a hotel room, practically unable to get enough of each other. Suddenly, they had so much more to talk abouteverything seemed to be going better.
*****
The Bennetts, meanwhile, were about to welcome their first child, yet they were back to datingcinema, dinner, art galleries. Emily unearthed her old recipe book, and Tom spoiled her weekly with gifts, if not at least a chocolate bar tucked in her bag. He couldnt even remember when he last watched the evening news.
*****
How are they getting on now? the lady in 222 asked her husband.
Oh, just the odd creak of a mattress these daysprobably because the kids are home. But things are livelier, I can tell. I keep listening, just to be sure.
And the Bennetts?
Getting on brilliantlylaughing together, kitchen smells fabulous, like a bistro.
Well, perfect! Three months, like clockwork. Well stay another fortnight just to be sure.
All right. Whos next?
Simmons at number 4, flat 65. Family next door in 66 has gone completely stale, probably cant remember each others names. At 64, just the usual case of a bedroom in need of help and a bit of order!
Understood. Right, I wont put your tapes away yetkeep up the noise a bit longer. And no need to cancel the restaurant ordersthe aroma oils are going strong. By the way, those roses you refreshed last week have wilted. Well need another bouquet.
Ill fetch some tomorrow. Do me a favour and rub my back, then lets turn in for the night
*****
Reflecting on these months of neighbourly influence and secret schemes, I realise sometimes the spark just needs a subtle nudgea whiff of inspiration, a generous ear, or even a gentle competition. Life goes on, but love is better when you let it grow, and its true: youre never too old to play.












