**Diary Entry**
Father left us for another woman when Emily was just four. It was right after New Yearshe muttered sorry at the door, then shut it behind him. Mum took it calmly, as if it were inevitable. In our family, no woman had ever known a lasting marriage. But a few weeks later, one night, she swallowed every diazepam and paracetamol in the house and never woke again.
That morning, Emily tried for ages to rouse her, shouting, shaking her. Then she scavenged breakfast from the fridge and tried once more. Exhausted, she curled up against Mums side and fell asleep.
January days fade fast. Dusk had settled when she woke, shivering. She tugged the blanket closer, pressing into Mums bodyonly to find it colder than the room. Then she understood. The unbearable chill came from *her*. Hot tears scorched Emilys cheeks.
The front door creaked open. Emily sprinted like a gustAunt Charlotte, Mums younger sister, stood there.
Emily, love, youre here! Wheres Mum? Ive rung all daywhy wont she answer?
Emily clutched Charlottes coat, yanking her toward the bedroom. Her mouth moved soundlessly, face twisted, tears and snot streaming.
Charlotte had no childrenher husband left her after five years, blaming barrenness. So she poured all her love into Emily, near a second mother. When tragedy struck, she fought for guardianship. Three years of specialists never restored the girls voice.
That winter, snow arrived with St. Stephens feastproper, crunching snow. Emily and her mates spent the day sledging in Hyde Park, built a snowman family, rolled and made snow angels.
Time to go. Youre frozen stiff, gloves like ice blocks. Quickwell nip to Tesco for milk and pasta, Charlotte urged.
Shoppers bustled past the automatic doors, but a ginger cat sat regal by the entrance, eyes half-lidded, paws tucking against the cold. Emily crouched beside it, waving Charlotte ahead.
Fine, but *stay here*.
She stroked the cats head. It arched, purring, then nuzzled her cheek. Suddenly, her tears fellthe creature licked them, sneezed, then licked again.
Ugh! Thats *filthy*street cats are riddled with germs! Charlotte dragged her toward the car. Emily fought, but was bundled into the back seat.
The cat trotted after, mewling at the window.
Hes *mine*I cant leave him, Emily whispered, tears streaking the glass.
Did you? Say that again! Charlottes voice shook.
Hell *die* without me! Emily screamed, clear as bells.
Charlotte lunged out, scooped the ginger furball up, and plopped beside Emily. The cat, startled, clawed her coatthen leapt to the girls lap and stilled.
You *wanted* a cat? Bloody hell, Id have got you one *years* ago, Charlotte laughed, wiping her eyes.
*Lesson learned: Sometimes grief needs a voice. Sometimes it takes a scruffy stray to claw it free.*
