Youre the older brother, so naturally, its your duty to help your little sister. Youve got two flats just hand one over to your sister!
Not too long ago, we were celebrating my sister-in-laws birthday. Now, let me tell you, Cynthias never been one for exchanging warm glances with me, and the feeling is remarkably mutual. The whole family turned up grandparents, nieces, nephews, and, of course, the woman of the hour herself. Every relative felt compelled to congratulate my husband for his sisters birthday, and in the same breath, they lauded his generosity as if he were Father Christmas himself.
My husband and I accepted these congratulations, but we both stood there thoroughly puzzled. Clutched in our hands was a card containing a gift of £100. Decent as birthday presents go, but it hardly screamed untold generosity. The mystery cleared up, however, when my mother-in-law began her speech.
Michael, your sister celebrates another year today. Shes still single, hasnt found herself a partner, so as her big brother you must look after her, ensure shes secure. Youve got two flats, so simply gift one to Cynthia.
The room erupted into applause, and I nearly fell off my chair, astounded by the cheek of it all. But of course, the madness didnt end there.
Brother dearest, Cynthia piped up cheerily, Id quite like the one in the new development. By the way, when can I move in? At this point, I decided someone ought to clarify how things stood.
Actually, my husband and I did own two flats. One was left to me by my gran we spruced it up a bit and now rent it out. The money from that helps pay off the mortgage for the flat where we actually live. My husband, technically speaking, doesnt have any rights over my inherited property, and I intend it for our child in future, not for my beloved sister-in-law.
Lets not get carried away, I replied, because the flat we rent out is mine, and the one youve got your eye on iswell, we rather enjoy living there ourselves.
Oh darling, my mother-in-law huffed, thats not how any of this works! Youre my sons wife, so everything you own is shared, and Michael should be running the show!
Fine by me, I shrugged, help whom you wish but kindly keep your hands off my property! Michael, anything you want to add?
My husband ever the peacemaker piped up, Sweetheart, well earn loads more and buy another flat, and we could give this one to Cynthia it is her birthday after all.
Please tell me youre joking? I blinked. If you absolutely must give your sister a slice of our home, youre welcome to once Ive filed for divorce!
Really, is this how you speak to your own husband? my mother-in-law snapped. If you want a divorce, so be it! Michael, pack your bags, come home to Mum, and as for you you nasty, cunning woman!
After those parting words, I left that madhouse, firmly convinced Id never stay amongst people who seemed to think my flat came with a first-come, first-served sign.
