You Take Advantage of Nan: She Watches Your Child, But Won’t Even Look After Mine on Weekends

Author Wanda MirandaReading 3 minViews 3

Youre taking advantage of Gran. She looks after your child and wont even take mine for the weekend.

Sometimes life throws you a curveball and you need to think fast. Thats exactly what happened to me.

My son, Oliver, has just turned four. Theres no question I adore himhes the apple of my eye. I wont pretend hes always on his best behaviour, but honestly, show me a four-year-old who is. Theyre all a bit mischievous, arent they? Im expecting my second now. And thats where this all began.

At my recent antenatal appointment, the doctor was concerned and sent me straight to hospital. No delay, no time to make plans. Suddenly, I had to sort out whod look after Oliver.

My husband was away in Edinburgh for workhe wouldnt be back for another ten days. Mum and Dad were both tied up at the office. There werent any other relatives able to help. In the end, Gran volunteered. Shes seventy, but she said shed look after Oliver until I was discharged. I couldnt help but worryshes spritely, but keeping up with a four-year-old is no small feat.

After some discussion, the arrangement was made. My parents said theyd pop in after work to help out, and during the day Gran would mind Oliver. So, thats how we managed.

Still, I couldnt settle. Its my child, after all. I rang Gran several times a day to check in and fuss over them both. Oddly, they seemed to get along just fine. The week passed quickly, and as soon as my husband returned, he took over.

Soon enough, I was preparing to come home. But that weekend my sister, Grace, rang up fuming. Her daughter Harriet is two, and apparently shes begged Gran to babysit, but Grans refused each timesaying Harriets too young to be left with her.

Grace was desperateshe all but pleaded for a break, just one afternoon off. And still, Gran said no.

Youve taken advantage of Gran! Grace said, absolutely livid.

But I told her, I had no choice. I couldnt bring Oliver to hospital with me, could I? I even asked if you could help, but you werent able. You wanted Gran to babysit so you could relax and potter about. But surely you can see the difference? Leaving a two-year-old with Gran is a whole other matter. Why dont you bring Harriet to our parents?

They wont watch her, and Im with her every minute of the day! Grace snapped.

I just think my sisters being unfair. Theres a world of difference between a two-year-old and a four-year-old. Truthfully, I wouldnt have sent Oliver to stay with relatives if Id had another option. But Grace seems to think I manipulated Gran somehow.

Cant help wondering if shes being honest with herselfor just jealous that, for once, I had to ask for help and got it.

The Key in His Hand Rain tapped monotonously at the window of the small London flat, like a metronome counting down the hours. Michael sat hunched on the edge of his sagging single bed, as if trying to make himself smaller, less visible to fate. His large hands, once strong and skilled on the factory floor, now rested helplessly on his knees. Occasionally, his fingers clenched in a futile attempt to seize something intangible. He stared not just at the peeling wallpaper but at the map of his hopeless daily routes: from the local NHS surgery to the private diagnostic clinic. His gaze was washed-out, like a faded film stuck on a single scene. Another doctor, another condescending “Well, at your age, you can’t expect miracles.” He didn’t get angry. Anger took energy—a resource he no longer had. All that remained was exhaustion. The pain in his back had become more than a symptom; it was a landscape, the constant white noise of helplessness behind every thought and action. He followed every instruction: took the medication, rubbed in the ointments, lay on the cold physiotherapy couch, feeling like a broken piece of machinery at a scrapyard. And all the while—he waited. Passively, almost religiously, he waited for the life preserver thrown by someone else: the state, a genius doctor, an expert professor, anyone who might haul him out of this slow-sinking bog. He searched the horizon of his life and saw nothing but the grey sheet of rain beyond the window. Michael’s resolve, once so focused on solving any problem at work or at home, had shrunk to a single function: to endure and hope for a miracle from outside. Family… It had all but disappeared, quietly and quickly. First, his clever daughter Katie left for the bright lights of Manchester. He wished her every success—“Dad, I’ll help as soon as I’m on my feet,” she’d promised on the phone. It almost didn’t matter. Then his wife left—not to the shops, but forever. Rachel had burned out fast: ruthless cancer found too late. Michael was left not only with his aching back but also the silent accusation—he, half-collapsed and half-upright, was alive, and she, his support and spark, was gone in three months. He looked after her as best he could until the cough broke her voice and the sparkle faded from her eyes. The last thing she said to him, holding his hand in the hospice: “Hold on, Mike…” And he broke entirely. Katie called and offered for him to move in with her, a rental on the outskirts. But what was the point? He’d only be a burden, out of place in her world, and she wasn’t coming back. Now only Rachel’s younger sister, Val, visited, every Thursday, like clockwork: a Tupperware of stew, a packet of painkillers, a bag of groceries. “How are you, Mike?” she’d ask, unbuttoning her coat. “Not bad,” he’d answer. She would tidy his pokey flat, as if tidying his world, then leave behind the faint scent of her perfume and the palpable sense of duty fulfilled. He was grateful. And infinitely alone. His loneliness wasn’t just physical; it was a cell of his own grief and quiet anger at an unfair world. One especially bleak evening, his eyes fell to the scuffed carpet—and spotted the flat key, dropped after his latest laborious return from the clinic. Just a key. Nothing special. As he stared, it became something else—the focus of his attention. Suddenly, he remembered his granddad, Peter, vividly, as if flicking on the light in a dark room. Granddad, with an empty sleeve tucked into his belt, could tie his laces one-handed with a broken fork, not hurrying, always triumphant when he succeeded. “See, Mikey—tools are always close at hand. Sometimes they look like junk, but that’s the trick: spot the ally in the scrap.” As a boy, Michael brushed it off as old man talk. Granddad was a hero; heroes manage anything. Michael was just ordinary, and his war with pain and loneliness couldn’t be won with kitchen utensils. But now, staring at the key, the old lesson struck home. Granddad never waited for rescue—he used what he had. Not to defeat pain or loss, but helplessness. What had Michael done? Only waited, bitter and passive, at the threshold of someone else’s kindness. The thought stirred him. Now, that key—a bit of metal, echoing with his granddad’s words—became an unspoken command. He stood, joints popping painfully, and grasped the key. Turning to the wall, he pressed the blunt end against the spot on his back that ached most. Then, carefully, he let his weight lean into it. It wasn’t treatment or massage—just pressure. Blunt, direct, pain against pain. He found a point where the struggle brought not a new jolt of agony but a dull, strange relief, as if something inside released ever so slightly. Small experiments: a bit higher, a bit lower. Again. Every movement was slow, tentative, attentive to his body’s response. It wasn’t a cure; it was a negotiation, and the old key was his tool of choice. He felt foolish—surely a key wasn’t a miracle. But the next evening, when the pain crept in again, he tried once more. And again. He found the spots, the leverage, and the strange relief, as if he could prise open the pain from within. He started to use the doorframe for gentle stretches. A glass of water on the bedside reminded him to stay hydrated. Just water—free, simple. Michael stopped waiting, hands in lap. Instead, he used what he had: a key, a doorframe, the floor for small stretches, his own determination. He kept a little notebook, not tracking pain, but victories: “Today I stood at the cooker five minutes longer.” He lined three empty baked bean tins on the windowsill, filled them with potting soil, and pressed in a few onion bulbs. Not a garden, exactly—but three containers of life for which he was now responsible. A month passed. At his next check-up, the GP looked at the scans, then at Michael. “There’s real improvement. Have you been doing something new?” “Yes,” Michael replied. “Tool improvisation.” He didn’t mention the key. The doctor wouldn’t understand. But Michael knew. No rescue ship. No miracle cure. Just tools—lying unnoticed on his floor, while he’d waited for someone else to turn on the light. One Wednesday, when Val arrived with her usual soup, she paused, surprised at the door. On the windowsill, green onion shoots pointed to the pale London sky. The room smelled of fresh growth, not staleness and pills. “You… what’s this?” she managed, staring at him—upright, smiling. “A garden,” Michael answered simply. Then, after a pause: “Want some for your soup? Homegrown, fresh.” That evening, she lingered over a cup of tea. He didn’t complain about his health; instead, he told her about the stairs—how each day, he climbed one step higher. Salvation didn’t appear as Dr. Dolittle or some visiting angel. It showed up as a door key, a frame, an empty tin, and the stairs outside. No magic, and no cure for age or grief. But in his hand, ordinary things became tools; not for grand victories, just for the small, daily climb. And sometimes, when you stop waiting for a golden staircase from the heavens and finally notice the everyday concrete one at your feet, you realize climbing it—slowly, steadily, with help where you find it—is what living really means. On the windowsill, in three humble tins, juicy green onions grew. And it was, truly, the finest garden in the world.