“You’ve got no heart. Can’t you see how much Daniel’s struggling? He’s your brotheryou could’ve helped him. You only ever think about yourself.”
Thats what my mum said to me recently when she called and told me to clear out all my things from her flat.
“We can barely move in here because of your clutter,” she snapped.
This all happened after I refused to give my brother, Daniel, the money for a deposit on a house. And yes, I mean *give*, not lend, because I know full well hed never pay me back.
After I said no, Daniel stormed out of my place in a rage. He was convinced Id just hand over my savings because hes got a wife and kids, and I dont.
I need to get this off my chest because my familys being unfair, especially right before the holidays.
When I moved to Manchester for uni, I started working part-time straight away. I lived in halls at first, then shared a flat with a mate. I didnt want to rely on my parents, so I worked hard not just to support myself but to help my mum too.
She never asked for cash outright, but shed always hint*bring back some decent shoes, a nice coat, something for the house*. And every time I visited, Id turn up with bags full of groceries.
Mum lives in a three-bed with Daniel. Our dad passed three years ago.
Daniel never cared much for studying. After school, he worked in Scotland for a bit, but all he had to show for it was a beat-up car. When he came back, he started driving a cab.
Then he married his girlfriend, Sophie, and moved her into Mums place. Money was always tight because Daniel lived hand-to-mouth. The second he and Sophie got paid, it was gone.
Both Mum and Sophies parents bailed them out regularly. Daniel knew someone would always step in, so he never bothered earning more or sorting his finances.
Now, Daniel and Sophie have two kids, with another on the way. Theyve decided Mums place is too small and want to buy their own.
Meanwhile, I rent a flat with my boyfriend, James. Were planning to marry but waiting for the right time. Were doing alrightJames is a software engineer, and I run a few online shops. We dont splash out on nonsense; were saving for our own place so we can start married life properly.
Mum knew our plans, but she still nudged Daniel to ask me for help.
“They want a house but cant scrape together the deposit,” she told me.
When Daniel turned up and demanded the money, I refused. He was livid. He thought I *owed* him, just because hes got a family and I dont.
Later, Mum rang me and said, “Youve got no heart. Cant you see how much Daniels struggling? Hes your brotheryou couldve helped him. You only ever think about yourself.”
Then she added, “Come get your things. We cant move for your junk. And dont bother coming for Christmas. Daniels furious, and frankly, Im not fussed about seeing you either.”
I didnt argue. Ill collect my stuff and cram it into my rented place. When James and I buy our home, Ill shift it there.
I *could* have lent Daniel the money, but I know hed never repay it. And he didnt even ask for a loanhe just expected me to hand over my savings.
All because hes got kids.
How would you deal with something like this?
