When I wanted to slip away unscathed
Andrew, could you hand me the car keys, please? Mum needs a lift to the clinic right away, Emma reached for her husband, who was sprawled on the settee. Ill be back in two hours, Ill bring your darling home safe and sound.
Andrew didnt even glance up from his phone.
No.
What do you mean no? Emmas hand fell limp. Its your day off, youre not going anywhere. Mums blood pressure is spiking, shes really ill.
I said no, so its no, Andrew finally tore himself from the screen and stared at his wife. Women behind the wheel always end up in trouble. Youll clip someone, crash into a lamppost, or something else altogether.
Emma stepped closer, fists tightening.
Andrew, what on earth are you saying?
What I said isnt wrong. I still have three years left on the car loan. I wont gamble my assets, he muttered, burying his face back into the phone as if the conversation were over.
Emma watched his crown of hair in silence, then turned and stormed out of the lounge, slamming the door behind her. In the hallway she fished out her phone and hailed a cab. The roundtrip cost her fifteen pounds. Mum kept apologising for the inconvenience the whole way, while Emma clenched her lips tighter, thinking how easily Andrew could have solved the problem if he had wanted to.
When she stepped back into the house, Andrew met her in the hallway with a guilty look.
Sorry, love. I know I was wrong. I didnt think Mum really needed help, he tried to pull her into an embrace, but she stepped back.
Leave me alone.
Come on, Emma, dont be angry. Im apologising! I get that I was out of line.
Emma drifted past him toward the kitchen, saying nothing. Andrew trailed, still pleading.
Fancy a coffee? Or perhaps a glass of wine? We could talk calmly?
Emma switched on the kettle and began scrubbing dishes with a ferocity that seemed to grind the plates into dust. Andrew lingered a few more minutes, then retreated to the bedroom.
Two months passed in a strained silence. Emma answered Andrew in monosyllables, only when necessary. He made several attempts to broach reconciliation, but each time he hit a wall of cold indifference.
On a Saturday morning Emma stood at the kitchen counter, chopping vegetables for stew. Rain drummed against the window, and the flat felt oddly cosy. She turned on some lowvolume music and settled into the rhythm of the cooking, finally relaxing after a hard week.
A sudden knock at the door made her start. She wiped her hands on a towel and went to answer, puzzled by the early hour.
Margaret? Emma took a step back, seeing her motherinlaw, Margaret, standing on the threshold, cheeks flushed with fury.
Youve lost all sense of decency! Margaret burst in. All you think about is how to push my son into debt! Do you even care how hell survive?
Emma blinked, trying to grasp the sudden storm.
Margaret, what are you talking about? Whats happened?
What happened? Margaret swiveled her whole body toward Emma, eyes blazing. You smashed Andrews car! Now my son will be paying a loan for three years for a heap of scrap metal!
Emma felt the floor slip away.
I never got behind Andrews wheel. Never! He turned me down when I asked for the keys.
Youre lying! Margaret hissed. My son told me everything! How you begged for his car and then smashed it to pieces!
Footsteps echoed from the hall and Andrew appeared. Margaret lunged at him.
She wont even admit it! Andy, dear, how will you live now? Three years paying for a busted car! No car, no money!
Emma stared at her husband, waiting for an explanation. Andrew only lowered his head and gave a barely perceptible nod.
Andrew? Emmas voice rasped. Tell Mum the truth. Tell her I never took your car.
Andrew stayed silent, staring at the socks on his slippers.
When exactly did I supposedly smash his car? Emma turned to Margaret, her voice turning metallic. Give me the exact date.
Margaret triumphantly produced her phone.
Tuesday at two oclock! I kept all the messages with Andrew! Here! She thrust the phone under Emmas nose.
Emma replayed the Tuesday in her mind a work conference
Tuesday? she snorted, and the sound stopped Margaret cold. I was at an offsite conference all day, from seven in the morning until nine at night.
Margarets face turned bewildered.
But Andrew said
Andrew lied, Emma stepped toward him. Isnt that right, love? Now tell us the truth. Who really broke your precious car?
Andrew lifted his head, his face flushing crimson spots.
Mum, Im sorry. I broke the car myself, his voice trembled. I didnt want you to be angry, to think Im useless. I thought if I blamed Emma
You shifted the blame onto an innocent person! Emma felt a wave of fury rise. And you even turned Mum against me!
Margaret sank onto a chair, her face paling.
Andy, how could you? Why lie? Why?
Mum, you know Im terrible at driving. Remember when, at eighteen, I scratched Dads car? You didnt speak to me for a week, Andrew tried to take his mothers hand, but she pulled away.
So you thought it was easier to make Emma the scapegoat? Margaret rose slowly. Youre a grown man! How can you dump responsibility on a woman?
Emma stood, arms crossed, watching the family tableau. Her anger softened into fatigue and disappointment.
You know what, Andrew? When you refused to let me use the car to take my mum to the doctor, I thought you were just selfish. Turns out youre even worse. Youre a coward.
Emma, please dont Andrew reached out.
Stop! she raised a hand. Dont. You were ready to ruin our marriage just to avoid admitting fault to your mother.
I wanted to be honest! I just didnt know how to start
Didnt know how to start? Emma laughed, a hollow sound. Sorry, Emmathats how honest conversations begin.
Margaret suddenly spoke, addressing her son.
Andy, you realise I thought Emma was selfish and irresponsible? Turns out she had nothing to do with this!
Mum, Ill change, Ill
Change? Emma moved to the window, watching the grey, rainy day. How will you fix what I now know about you? That in a crisis youd rather blame me so you can swim out of the water unscathed?
Silence settled over the flat.
Emma, Andrew called softly, what now?
She didnt turn.
I dont know, Andrew. I thought I married a man I could rely on. Turns out hell throw me under the bus at the first chance.
You dont love me! he blurted.
Love? A loving person doesnt act like this. A loving person doesnt make the one they love suffer for their own peace of mind.
Margaret rose from her chair and approached her daughterinlaw.
Emma, Im sorry. Im sorry I believed the lies, that I shouted at you. I was wrong.
Margaret, you acted like any mother would, protecting her child. I hold no grudge against you, Emma said, a flicker of sympathy in her eyes.
But against Andrew? Margaret asked quietly.
Yes, against Andrew, Emma confirmed. And its serious.
Andrew sprang up and ran to his wife.
Emma, tell me what to do. Ill do anything for your forgiveness!
Youre ready to do anything now, she said, pulling away from his touch. But youve already lied once and shifted blame. That shows who you truly are.
Ill change!
People dont change in a day. Those capable of such treachery change even less.
She retreated to the kitchen, leaving Andrew and Margaret alone with their thoughts. Behind the door, muffled voices drifted. Margaret scolded her son for his behaviour.
Emma weighed her options. What to do next? How to live with a husband like that?
There was no way. No matter how hard Emma tried, she couldnt erase it.
She opened the search bar on her phone and typed, How to get a divorce quickly? The decision was made
