When he got home from work, the cat was nowhere to be found.
Simon was an unassuming chap, without any serious vices. For his 25th birthday, his parents gave him a flat. Well, gave might be stretching itthey helped him pull together the deposit for his mortgage and sent him off into the thrilling world of grownup domestic responsibility. So Simon started living on his own. He worked as a programmer, preferred a quiet life, and wasnt exactly the social butterfly of the office.
To stave off boredom, Simon decided to adopt a kitten. The little thing had a wonky set of front paws. The people with the kittens mum said they wanted to have him put down, but Simons heart went out to the poor soul and he took him in. He called him Sir Whiskers. And honestly, life was good: Simon would dash home from work to see Sir Whiskers, whod park himself on to the hallway mat, almost as if he was expecting a pizza delivery rather than his owner.
After a bit, Simon began seeing a girl from work. The girl, Georgina (decidedly sharp-witted), wasted no time sweeping Simon off his feet and, within a month, moved in with him. She took an instant dislike to Sir Whiskers and asked Simon if hed consider finding the cat another home. Simon flatly refused, explaining that Sir Whiskers was pretty much family and, frankly, far less high-maintenance.
But Georgina wasnt the sort to let things drop. She kept nudging Simon about the cat, saying his presence was a bad lookher friends always recoiled at the odd paws. Simon found himself torn between Georgina and Sir Whiskers; as misfortune would have it, he cared about them both.
For the record, Simons parents were distinctly unimpressed by Georgina. They reckoned she was cheeky and a bit rude, and advised their son not to rush into anything marital. Just take your time, Simon dear, they said, eyeing her with the enthusiasm reserved for low-fat yoghurt.
Matters hit a new low when Georginas parents dropped by. Simon, within moments, realised he very likely didnt want a long-term arrangement with her. Her dad burst out laughing the second he clapped eyes on Sir Whiskers, calling him a right odd bod. Simon leapt to the cats defence, but all evening, Georgina and her father gleefully mocked the felines looks and brainstormed any number of creative solutions for cat relocation. Her mother joined in, roaring with laughter at the poor creatures expense.
The next day, when Simon returned from the code mines, Sir Whiskers was missing. In response to his frantic inquiry, Georgina cheerfully informed him shed dropped the cat off at the vets and left him there. Simon tore out of the flat and spent five hours on a wild goose chase before eventually tracking down Sir Whiskers. The reunion was straight out of an emotional TV ad: the cat purred away in his arms, thoroughly chuffed to have been rescued.
Back home, Simon told Georgina to pack her bags and leave. He never wanted to see her againher standing in his heart had plummeted to somewhere below burnt toast.
The next morning, Georgina quietly shuffled home, humiliated and a touch tight-lipped. Shed never imagined a cat could ever be chosen over her. Simon and Sir Whiskers now live contentedly together; the cat always greets Simon after work with more enthusiasm than he ever received from Georgina.












