Thats Igors baby
This all happened not so long ago, in a well-kept flat on the fourth floor of a nine-storey block in Sheffield. There lived a working pensionera single lady named Margaret.
Nothing in her life ever hinted at anything particularly extraordinary. Everything was steady: her pension, her part-time work, friends, trips to see the grandchildren, and helping her elderly mother who lived separately.
And that day began like any other.
That morning, Margaret rang her mother to check how she was feeling.
Yes, just another ordinary day. Her day off. Margaret worked one shift in four, picking up hours as a receptionist at a private medical practiceanswering calls and booking appointments.
What was she doing today? Well, as usualshed cook something and go see her mum, as she did daily. To be frank, she was rather tired of this everyday ritual, which prompted sighs and an occasional rolling of her eyes.
It was two courtyards walknothing difficult. Cooking, also not a problem, especially as there was leftover soup and a bit of cake at her mums. The fifth floor up to her mothers, thoughno lift! Oh!
Her mothers endless aches and complaints were another thing that made Margaret sigh wearily. She would patiently listen to all her mums lengthy talesabout twinges here, stabbing pains thereknowing these stories wouldnt yield any solutions. Her mother had already taken every diagnosis from every doctor, rethought them, reworked them, and restated them with the added wisdom of nosey neighbours and the health advice of the latest daytime television doctor.
Margarets own suggestions were swiftly dismissedher mother never saw her as sufficiently knowledgeable to grasp the full extent of her ailments, despite the fact that Margaret had been a theatre nurse for almost forty years.
Oh, what do you know! Hand me the scalpel, indeed!
So, as ever, an ordinary day.
Shed need to stop at the shop as wellmight as well fit it in en route to her mothers. She dumped the bin liner by the front door, stepped over to the hall mirror for a quick dab of lipstick. She looked quite youthful for her sixty-odd yearsfine lines at the corners of her eyes, but otherwise a pleasant face framed by a short ash-blonde cut and large earrings. Only her cheeks were, perhaps, just starting to sag a bit.
Better get granary bread for mum, and a bit of butter, she was thinking as she traced her lips with a pencil, when the doorbell rang.
The entry phone system buzzed. Who on earth at this hour? Perhaps Auntie Joan from next door. Margaret would sometimes invite her for a cup of tea.
Margaret, lipstick in hand, went to the door and swung it open.
Standing there was a fair-haired girl with her hair tied back, wearing a stripy t-shirt, a long dark cardigan and jeans, a rucksack on her back. All of that, Margaret only noticed later. At that moment, she saw only the girls face, and a little baby bundled up in brown in her arms.
Narrowed eyes, tense cheeks, a deep breath, a step up closethen the bundle was thrust into Margarets hands with a short:
Its for you.
Margaret instinctively took the babylipstick still in one hand. She felt the weight, looked down Good grief, it was a baby!
By the time she looked up, the girl was already hurrying down the stairs.
Margaret stepped out onto the landing, not surewhy had she just been handed a baby?
Thats Igors baby. I need to study the girl called back, her steps echoing as she ran.
The main door below slammed shut.
And that was it.
Margaret stood there a while, certain the girl would return any minute now and take the child back. When nothing happened, she wandered back inside, glanced at her shopping bag, and, oddly enough, thought, Mustnt forget the rubbish on my way to Mums.
There was an unfamiliar bag in the hall. She hadnt seen when the girl put it down.
Only later, as the shock wore off, did it properly hit her.
Oh my word. A living, breathing baby! And what had she saidIgors baby?
Had she really said Igors?
Margaret, baby in arms, went into the living room and sat on the sofa. Yes, the girl definitely said Igors.
But which Igor?
Margaret had one sonand his name was Leon. He was married with two kids of his own and lived all the way down in Oxford, while Margaret was here in Sheffield. Her husband Victor had passed away five years earlier.
None of this made sense The child stirred in her arms. Oh heavens!
Quickly she laid the child down on the sofa and unwrapped the blanket: there was a little one in a beige knit suit, so tiny, with a frog-shaped dummy. No more than a month old, surely.
There, there, little one Margaret stroked its head, and the baby wriggled its lips and slipped back to sleep.
She decided to check the strange bag for clues, but there were only two bottles, a tin of formula, a pack of nappies and some baby clothes.
Still, she half-expected that at any second the bell would go and the girl would take her child back, apologise, and the day would drift back to its usual course.
Margaret even finished her makeup and peered anxiously out the window for any sign of the girl.
But she didnt return. How very unusual and, frankly, worrying.
Soon enough the baby became restive. Margaret hesitatedwas it even her place to feed and change the baby? Was she allowed? She couldnt rid herself of the thought that it wasnt really right. She kept pacing to the window, waiting
But in the end, she had to remove the suit. Underneath: a vest and baby grow.
A girl.
Only now did a creeping sense of responsibility begin to overwhelm Margaret. She realised, with an odd chill, that the baby had been dumped on her doorstep.
Igor Igor
And what if
Her own son had been quite the socialiser in his youth. Shed had words with him about his habit of swapping girlfriends; once or twice hed even brought some homea real worry, it had been. But that was years ago, long before he married.
He seemed happy now, busy with business and family, as young couples are. Things were looking up recentlytheyd cleared the mortgage, bought a new car, the children were growing fast
There, my lovely girl, dont cry, lets get a clean nappy
God abovehad the child really been abandoned by her own mother?
Her mind didnt want to accept it, but her hands remembered well enoughdeftly she changed the nappy, zipped her into the same little grow, picked up the squeaking bundle and went to the kitchenshed need to make up a feed.
At that moment the phone rang. Margaret answered awkwardly with one hand.
Why didnt you answer sooner? Her mothers voice, sharp as ever.
I was busy, Mum. What do you need?
Are you at the shop yet?
No, not yet.
Well, Id like some pears. Not the ones you bought last time, the ones before that.
All right, Mum.
You remember which?
Ill try.
Theyre slim at the top with a dark red side. Tasty. Make sure theyre soft this time, not like last batch. Last ones were awful
The child fussed and whimpered in her arms.
Yes, Mum. Got it
Whats that I hear?
The telly.
Oh, typical. Im here waiting, and youre watching telly Turn it off and get yourself to the bakery. All the best bread will be gone!
Margaret hung up, rocked the baby, and checked the formula tin for instructions.
No, something had to be done.
Leon.
Its nearly June nowwait, yes, he had a work trip to Bath last August. Did he use the name Igor? Would he lie?
Perhaps for a fleeting affair She only saw him now as an upstanding family man, but who knows.
She tested the formulatoo hot, so cooled it under cold water.
Her left arm ached from holding the babyshe was out of practice: shed once lugged a nine kilo toddler about, but this?
Should she call 999? She was torn.
What if the child was Leons? She gazed closely at the babyyes, there was a resemblance to little Steph, her granddaughter.
What then? Then it would be a scandal, and his wife Sam would never forgive him. Or the children
It was too awful to dwell on.
There you are, sweetness. Good girl
The little girl sucked her bottle, lips smacking, eyes fluttering contentedly. Margaret found herself movedwhat a little darling! She realised how much she missed tiny babies.
When the girl slept, Margaret very carefully laid her on the sofa, slipped off to the kitchen, and dialled her sons number. No luckunavailable.
Blast.
Margaret decided not to act hastily. She didnt want to cause problems for her son. She held out hope the girl might return. She didnt look like someone rougha skinny, student-looking sort.
But telling her mother about this was out of the questionshe didnt fancy hours of hand-wringing and dire warnings.
Margaret rang her grandson Ben and learned that Leon was installing gas pipes somewhere in a remote area with no reception. Hed only be home the day after tomorrow. But he called Sam every evening, all was well.
Honestly, Ben, someone could have let me know! Margaret grumbled.
Still, she knew Leon was often off for work, and didnt have to keep her posted. She just needed to talk to him, so she was cross.
She then phoned Sam, asking her to get Leon to ring her that evening if he could.
Is something wrong? Should I tell him anything? Sam asked, concerned.
No, no, just really need his call, please, Sam.
Sam promised.
Mum, Ive twisted my ankle, wont be able to pop by today, she lied to her own mother, But youve still got some soup left, and plenty of bread
Her mother fussed, demanded answers, threatened to come over herself (fifth-floor walk though), and rang another five times.
After that Margaret dropped her white trousers, changed to a house dress, sat with the baby girl and looked at her, thinking hard now.
Perhaps shed been a bit slow-witted in taking the child in. But children do get abandoned on doorsteps. It could have been much worse.
Why didnt she just call the police and be shot of the responsibility?
Well, first of allworry for her son, even if he wasnt Igor. What if hed used a false name? Second, she really didnt feel like a trip to the police and embarking on endless explanations. And third, something about the girls gaze stuck with herthe look of a desperate, angry, but oddly certain mother.
She needed advice. Who else but an old friend?
Vicky, youre not going to believe this. Someone has left a baby on my doorstep
Victoria didnt panic, she launched into analysis like Sherlock Holmes, and promised to come round after work.
Stay calm, Marg, well sort it! Dont do anything rash.
Do you think I shouldnt phone the police?
Wait a moment. We have to find Igor.
Oh lord, Vicky, which Igor?
The father. Any Igors in your building?
How would I know? Theres fifty flats, nine floors, she could have got the wrong one.
Possible. But maybe Leons to blame. You need to speak to him.
Margaret spent the rest of the day caring for the girl. She scrolled advice online on feeding schedules, found herself reading all sorts of baby care tipsand put some of them into practice. She did a bit of massage, made sure the baby had been, bathed her, moisturised, and even hummed a lullaby.
Hows your ankle? Will you pop round tomorrow? her mother called.
Margaret was sure itd all be sorted by tomorrow and promised to visit.
Victoria appeared after work and began her investigation. She checked over the babys things, then visited the neighbours, mentioning some letter for Igor rather than the babythey didnt want to start gossip.
Got it! Victoria declared, bounding back in.
Shh! Shes just got off to sleep! Margaret whispered, but the baby woke and whimpered. I found him! Theres an Igor on the sixth floor, might be the father.
I bet she just got confused on the floorlets go!
Go where?
To Igor, obviously! said Vicky, determined.
And what if he denies everything?
Well put the squeeze on, see what comes out.
Oh, Vicky, its silly. If we turn up, hell think were bonkers!
You want the truth or not?
Margaret did. They rocked the girl back to sleep, shunned the lift, crept up to the sixth floor, and rang the bell.
Whos there? croaked an old womans voice.
Could we see Igor, please? Vicky called back.
A stooped old lady opened the door, scowled at them, then shambled away inside, calling, Igor! Someones here again for you
Vicky marched into the dim hall; Margaret hovered. A short, scruffy-looking young man emerged, bearded and sleepy.
Hello, is this about the tablet?
Tablet? No, no, its about something else. See, Margaret here has your baby by mistake
He blinked, looked from one to the other.
Mymy what? Baby? Not mine!
But youre the only Igor here Vicky pressed.
I dont have any kids! He shook his head in astonishment.
So you say. But maybe theres been a slip-up
Hang on, Vicky Margaret felt less certain. She explained, Im from number 18this morning, a girl brought and left a baby girl with me, said it was for Igor, then rushed off. I have no idea who she was, but perhaps she got the wrong flat. I dont know any Igors, you see.
Whats this got to do with me? he asked, confused.
Do you deny it? Vicky said testily.
What? A baby? No idea what youre on about
Itd be easier to show you. Are you sure you didnt have a girlfriend last summer?
A girlfriend? No. I barely use the internet, let alone meet people! Youve got the wrong man, he insisted, What did the girl look like?
I dont know. She didnt introduce herself, said Margaret, dejected. Sorry, we mustve made a mistake.
Margaret tugged Vickys sleeve. They started down the stairs.
Waitif I can help, Im a blogger. I could do a post: mother wanted. Photo of the baby, estimated age
No, no thank you, waved Margaret, Im still not convinced my son isnt involved, and anyway the law says ring 999, not go on the internet.
Alright, but if you need help, let me know. I work from home.
Kids these days! Vicky muttered, Dont have to go into an office. Dyou think hes lying?
No, obviously a stay-at-home tech wizarddoesnt strike me as a heartbreaker.
Margaret still hadnt heard from Leon, so called Sam.
Oh, sorry, Marg! I was all over the placeswimming for Steph, football kit for Ben, running errands, and Leon called toomad day!
If only she knew what kind of day Margaret was having.
Thats it, Ill call the police tomorrow!
But when she went to bed and closed her eyes, the young womans desperate look was there againhopes, fears, and longing. What would become of the little girl if Margaret phoned the police tomorrow?
The night was dreadful. She woke to every baby sound, paced the room rocking her, made more formula. By morning they both dozed off together.
Her mums call woke her.
Hows your ankle? Are you coming?
She glanced outside, then at the child.
Yes, Im coming.
Dont forget pears, and
Children needed fresh air, after all. She improvised a baby sling with a scarf, lovingly dressed the little one. All her clothes were nearly newsweet as anything. Off they headed to the shop.
Margaret actually found herself enjoying going about not alone any longerexcept for that matter of the fifth floor.
Whats this? her mother exclaimed, eyes wide.
Not what, mum, who. Here, take the groceries, Margaret handed over the bags and headed for the lounge with the little girl.
Where did she come from?
Nadia from next door asked me to watch her granddaughtershes getting her hair done, just for an hour.
And your ankle?
Healed now.
They both fussed over the baby. Not a word of aches and stages of pain today.
Look at those fingers! So strong Whats her name?
I didnt ask. Only for an hour, so
Oh you! Who leaves a baby with a stranger and doesnt give a name? Mum shook her head reprovingly.
Margaret deliberately pondered names for the girl on the way home, imagining what her mother might have called her.
Back at homea text! Leon was back in reach. She sat down, baby in arms, and rang him at once.
Mum, what? Im married! What are you talking about? His voice, bemused and a bit scandalised.
But Leon, she said it was Igors baby, and I thoughtwhat if thats you
Mum, you named me Leon! Its a mix up. Ring the police now. Want me to do it?
No, I will. But shes hungry and I took her out for air. Ill get it sorted
Mum! Police! Im worried for you
Relax. I probably made too much of it, but shes such a good baby.
You know you should have looked after Petes son once. Never mind. Ring me when youve spoken to the police.
Margaret didnt call. The little girl needed feeding, and changing, and there was always so much to do! Just let her get things straight first, report back to Vicky, and
Oh! In the end, shed have to hand the girl over. Where would she end up? A childrens home? Which one, she wondered, picturing the various hospitals shed known during her career, convinced none would be as good as her own care.
But tomorrow she was due on shiftthat was one thing. And another: it was likely a criminal matter to keep an abandoned baby without telling anyone.
Leon was right.
She sighed and tended to the little one regardless. She was exhausted, but ohthe days had been so full and rich!
Both drifted off, half-asleepthe child nestled into her arm.
A sharp ring at the door cut across the silence.
Margaret gently freed her arm, looked through the spyhole, and stiffened. She opened the door.
Where is she? Did you hand her in? Why didnt you tell me straight away?
There, clinging to the doorframe, was the scatterbrained motherthe very girl whod abandoned her child. Her frightened, darting eyes, just a vest top and shorts despite the chill. She was breathless, hair wild about her face.
I didnt tell you what? Margaret mumbled, barely awake.
That it wasnt you, the girl blurted, desperate.
Probably because it was me. Margaret raised her brows. And you did vanish in a flash.
Fine, but you know where she is, right? You mustyou must know!
The look in her eyes begged: Help me. Please, know! Please know
Margaret stepped aside.
Come in.
The girl came in at once, hoping for word of her daughter, eager to run wherever she was sent. She looked Margaret in the eye, waiting.
Shes here, Margaret told her, tense.
Where? You must know exactly. Where is she, exactly?
Exactlyon the bed. Sleeping.
Margaret led her to the spare room. The girl, puzzled, peered in and saw her daughter; instantly, she burst into tears, sinking to the floor, sobbing uncontrollably. Margaret fetched her water and sweet tea, soothed her back to her senses, made her eat a square of chocolate, careful as a nurse.
Come on, eat, or youll faint, Margaret said gently.
Between gulps and sobs, the story emerged: Her name was Julia, and the babyEllie.
It was, as is so often the case, a simple and sad story. Julia, young and unworldly, still green as a spring leaf.
She was a medical student here in Sheffield, as Margaret once was, though back then they called it a school of nursing. From a tiny Yorkshire village.
Last summer shed fallen for a local Sheffield ladIgor, a uni student. Shed only ever been to his flat once, number twenty-one. At first, he hadnt denied the baby, even promised Julia his mother would help.
After Christmas he just vanished. Phone line dead.
She knew he was at the University of Sheffield. She found his friends, only to learn hed transferred to Liverpool. No one would give her a number, addressnothing.
Back at home, there was her dad and stepmum. Stepmum, not so bad. But her father called her a whore, nearly turned her out and said he wouldnt help any more.
She ended up heavily pregnant in a shared room in halls. An aunt sent a little money, but couldnt support her fully. Julia studied hard, determined to become a nurse.
Igor popped online sometimes. Julia would write; hed reply on occasion, then delete everything, shut her out. He didnt want to hear about the baby.
She had her baby here, in Sheffield. No way back to the hallsshe managed two weeks at a school friends and was desperate to get through her exams to finish her course. She was a good student.
But fate struck hard: her friend asked her to move out; cash ran out; she had no way to sit exams a baby in her arms. On social media she saw some new girl in a cosy photo with Igor.
She clung to what she remembered: Igors mum was meant to help. In a daze, she found her way to flat twenty-one of what she thought was Igors building.
She left the child, raced to catch the bus, in tears and half-blinded. The night was a blur of revision and crying.
The next morning, she left Igor a message onlineshed get the baby after her exams. Only then did she learn that Igors mother knew nothing about a baby.
She panickedrealised the baby wasnt with her grandmother, but with some stranger. Shed mixed up the block of flats: Igor lived in almost identical building in the next street. Number twenty-one, wrong one.
But Id seen photos of Igors mum. She looked just like you. Same haircut and all Julia wailed. Lord, what was I thinking?
You know, said Margaret, they say the height of stupidity is to create a masterpiece and then refuse to sign your name to it. I kept thinkingwhat kind of mother could abandon such a little wonder? Im glad you came back for her. What now? Back to Igors mums flat?
No. Julia shook her head. I nearly lost my mind yesterday. Spent the night searching for my Ellie. Never again. Ill go back to halls with her. Itll do for now. Aunty might take me later on.
Are you sure youll manage?
Dont worryIll sit in corridors if I must; its exam time, everyones busy. Later, maybe Ill go to my aunts. Still, I let you down. You must have worried too?
Well, yes. I thought my own son was involvedfor the life of me! Margaret laughed. We owe our neighbour an apology, too!
She recounted their clumsy visit to Igor upstairs. Even Julia managed a smile through her red eyes.
That poor chap. I ought to go and set him straight.
Youlike that, all puffy? And besides, stay here tonight. I live alone. My sons been telling me for ages I should get a lodger. Move inat least for a bit?
With you? I couldnt. I cant pay rent. Halls will manage. If not, Ill tough it outexams first, then Auntie. She wont throw us out. Ill manage.
Noyou will stay, at least till your exams are over. Whens your first paper?
Day after tomorrow, but
Good, so you can revise here today. Ill be at work in the morning. Theres food, formulaI bought a fresh tin. Oh, but youre still breastfeeding
She glanced at Julia, already fast asleep in the armchair, Ellie snoozing on the bed.
Vickyits not Leons, or neighbour Igors! The girl came backshes here. Asleep. Im letting her stay a while. Oh, Vicky, thank God I didnt call the police!
***
The milk came in. Julia passed her exams with flying colours. Now it was she who called in on Margarets mumgood for that weary climb to the fifth floor.
Miracles happenMargarets mother listened to Julias advice without question.
Shes got up-to-date knowledge! Clever girl.
After exams, Julia took workMargaret pulled some strings, got her on ambulance cover. Smart as she was, she often sought Margarets advice; nursing had truly become her passion.
Curiously enough, the neighbour Igor realised his gran needed a bit of medical attention. Julia helped with the injections.
That autumn, she even found herself moving up two floorsto house-sit and nurse the old lady, to face her disappointment about true love, and to start rewriting her lifethis time, hopefully, with happier chapters.
***
That was the strangest day Ive ever had, and it taught me how quickly our routines can get shaken by the worlds surprises. People arent always who they seem, and its easier to judge than to understand. In the end, kindnessjust a littlecan change someone elses life, or maybe your own. Thats what Ill remember.
