The Right to Happiness: Falling in Love at 50 and the Unexpected Fear
When Love Strikes Out of the Blue
I never imagined I could fall so deeply in love at the age of 50.
Once married, I raised two children and welcomed grandchildren. It seemed as if life was just cruising along, and I wasn’t expecting any grand emotions.
But fate had other plans.
I wasn’t searching for love; it found its way to me.
And it became the most intense, vivid, and painful feeling of my entire life.
As if I Were 20 Again
Many say that grown-ups love differently.
That’s a lie.
It’s the same butterflies in your stomach, the same racing heartbeat, the same sleepless nights, but now accompanied by fear.
Fear of losing it.
When I was 20, I loved recklessly like a child. Now, every day, I am grateful for this woman that destiny has brought into my life.
Each time I gaze at her, touch her hair, kiss her temple, or hold her hand, I realize:
— Here she is, the love I’ve waited for all my life.
But with this happiness also came fear.
Her Daughter Is My Pain
She was an incredible woman.
Kind, gentle, caring. Strong and wise.
We moved in together, and my home was filled with love and light once more.
But over time, I noticed something was troubling her.
She received phone calls almost daily. The voice on the other end always said the same thing:
— Mum, I need money.
She had a daughter, a second-year university student.
Sounds normal, right?
The problem was that her daughter had been working for quite some time and was earning a decent wage.
Yet, she continued to drain the last resources from her mother.
Either for university accommodation, another term’s fees, or a loan to a friend.
I saw how this was tearing my woman apart inside.
She was angry, cried, torn between her sense of duty and the desire to be with me.
I would say:
— My love, in time, everything will settle. Soon it will just be the two of us.
But deep down, I didn’t believe it.
I Fear She Might Leave One Day
Sometimes, leaving work, I dreaded going home.
Afraid of walking into an empty house.
Afraid of finding her belongings gone.
I was in agony, but in silence.
Crying over love.
Do you understand what that means for a man?
I’m sure such women as her are the ones poems are written about.
What if She Goes Back to Her Daughter?
I have no idea what the future holds.
If one day she says:
— I must return.
I would probably just break.
Because she is everything a man dreams of at this stage in life.
If you are reading this, my love, know this:
I love you more than life itself.
And if necessary — I am ready to share you with your daughter.
But please…
Don’t leave me.
Without you, my world would lose its meaning.
