My sister is obsessed with her job, entirely focused on her career, I said. Shes forty, single, and childless. Shes already bought herself a flat and a car. She rarely keeps in touch with me or with our parents, but seems to expect something from them.
My sister and I have always had a distant relationship, right from childhood, mostly because were so different, both in appearance and personality. Im the calm, family-oriented type: I married young, have three children, and spend most of my time running our household. My older sister, on the other hand, is determined and wildly ambitious, always striving to reach her goals. Shes often away on business trips, which means she hardly ever communicates with the family especially when it comes to gatherings at our parents house during holidays. I remain closely connected to Mum and Dad: they help out with the children, accompany them to school plays and sports days, and we often celebrate birthdays and Christmas in their spacious three-bedroom flat.
At the moment, my own family and I are squeezed into a small one-bedroom house. Seeing how cramped we are, my parents spent a long time thinking about what to do. In the end, they decided to offer me a swap: their flat for my house. Their one-bedroom flat no longer fits their needs, and they cant upgrade or take out a mortgage, since only my husband works now. They wanted to help by swapping properties and immediately signing the flat over to me.
What they didnt expect was my sisters reaction. She was clearly unhappy: So Rebecca gets the whole flat, and what about me? Am I not your daughter too? Mum tried to explain: Sweetheart, please understand our position. Were not neglecting you. Youve achieved everything on your own, and if you want something bigger, were sure youll manage. Rebeccas situation is more pressing. She has a family, children, and only one bedroom. Despite Mums explanation, my older sister felt left out, and responded with quite a bit of resentment. I couldnt help but speak up: Shes acting like a spoilt child who didnt get her sweets. Mums right we need the help more. She already has everything. Wants another holiday in Bali? Shes also the one who chooses to keep her distance, ignoring calls for weeks. Shes being selfish.
And so the question remains: Is my sister selfish for overlooking my needs, or is her independence and right as a daughter worthy of attention when it comes to their flat?
