Eleanor Whitaker first laid eyes on Andrew Clarke at the office. Hed turned up for a job interview in the procurement department, and shed just burst into HR to sign a paperwork order.
Shed rushed in to stamp the form, but a glance at the goodlooking visitor made her pause.
Handsome fellow, and clearly selfsufficient, she thought with a cheeky smile. You can tell a mans character at a glance They dont make chaps like that any more. She lingered, catching snippets of conversation. Right procurement So well be meeting soon enough.
The next morning the stranger appeared in the accounts office, greeted everyone with a warm nod and, most importantly, lingered his gaze on Eleanor. A curious shiver ran down her spine. Well, isnt that something, she mumbled, halfamused, weve seen a few of those. Whether shed truly seen them before the tale remains silent, but it didnt take long for Eleanor to realise that Andrew was not like her former suitors.
Andrew always looked her straight in the eye gently, attentively, never in a rush. He solved problems with a calm ease, often before anyone even asked, yet never imposed himself. He could disappear into the background, and somehow always turned up precisely when he was needed most.
All of this left an indelible impression on Eleanor. She fell completely, irrevocably, for a man she could only have dreamed about.
A few months later they were sharing a flat, and six months after that they were married. When their son arrived an uncanny miniature of Andrew Eleanor finally grasped what happiness felt like.
At night she would nestle against her husband and whisper:
Dont you dare go anywhere, love. Ive tied you down for good, havent I?
I wasnt planning on leaving anyway, hed reply, planting a kiss on her temple.
***
Eleanor knew from the start that Andrew had a daughter from a previous marriage. Shed asked about her, but he was reluctant to spill details. One evening he finally let slip:
We havent been in touch for years; I dont even have her number. When Lucy was three, my exwife Mabel didnt want us to speak. Now shes a teenager So, lets not dig up the past.
Eleanor shrugged.
Fair enough. If you ever want to find her, let me know. Ill back you up.
He nodded. No more questions followed. Andrews point was taken: everyone carries a past.
***
One evening Andrew came home looking unusually distant. He shrugged off his coat, trudged to the kitchen without a word, poured himself a glass of water and simply stood there, glass in hand.
Andrew, whats the matter? Eleanor asked, her voice tinged with worry.
He glanced at her, guilt flickering in his eyes, and then spoke as if a decision had finally been made:
I I found Mabel online. Sent her a message to see how she and Lucy were doing. Turns out Lucy wants to talk to me. We even chatted on the phone.
Eleanor froze. Shed reminded Andrew countless times about Lucy, but the news left her breathless, as if something inside had snapped.
Well, thats wonderful! she managed, masking her discomfort. Im really happy for you.
Andrews face lit up; he needed to hear that. Eleanor, meanwhile, felt an unexpected weight settle in her chest.
***
At first it was just brief calls. Hed slip into his study, shut the door and mutter, Lucys shy. Eleanor was left alone in the kitchen, hearing his soft, affectionate tone the same velvety timbre that had only a few weeks earlier been reserved for her.
Soon the exwifes presence grew. Short texts turned into longer messages. Eleanors fingers instinctively reached for Andrews phone when he left it unattended. She read the messages, saw photos of a girl she didnt know, and caught the saccharine undertone: Were here, were close, were waiting.
Each time Andrew disappeared with his phone, she tried to convince herself, Hes just talking to his daughter, nothing more. But one day, passing by the hallway, she heard the name.
Mabel.
From that moment on, her private hell took on a concrete shape.
She hated herself for the jealousy, yet she couldnt stop. She watched him smile at the screen, hold his breath while choosing a reply. Every glance, every gesture seemed to scream betrayal; she was convinced he was leading a double life.
Day after day, the green-eyed monster flared, and everything around her began to grate.
You dont value me at all! she exploded one evening as Andrew absentmindedly scrolled through his phone.
What on earth are you on about, Eleanor? he asked, genuinely baffled.
Dont play dumb! I see everything! Youre still chatting with her!
Whos her? he replied, as if the word itself was a mystery.
It only fed her fury. Each ring of his phone felt like an electric shock; every overtime shift became evidence of infidelity. She turned into a spy in her own home, all because she loved him to the point of selfdestruction.
He said nothing, offered no explanations, as if he couldnt see the torment he was causing. It just wasnt like him at all.
***
Soon their arguments became frequent, often over nothing at all. Tiny irritations ballooned into what felt like a global crisis. Eleanor shouted that Andrew no longer listened to her, that his gaze had changed, that perhaps her very presence was a burden.
In her mind a dreadful thought kept looping: If anything, he has somewhere else to go. Somewhere that loves him, waits for him.
She had once been sure of their marriage. Now the home she adored felt precarious, no longer a safe haven. At night she lay awake, eyes wide, wondering, What if he decides the past is more important than us?
By morning she scolded herself, urging, Were a family. No, he isnt that kind of man. Yet the more she reassured herself, the deeper the fear grew.
***
One night Andrew left his phone on the kitchen counter and went to bathe their son. A notification lit up the screen: Mabel.
Eleanors fingers trembled, her heart tightened. She didnt open the message; the mere thought of what might be inside was enough to freeze her.
Later, after the baby was asleep, Andrew asked, Whats wrong with you tonight?
Nothing, really, she replied a little too quickly.
He stared at her, his gaze lingering a moment longer than usual, as if hed caught on to something, but said nothing.
When the house finally fell silent, Eleanor listened to his steady breathing, warm and familiar. Then a thought slipped in: perhaps it would soon be another womans breath she was listening to. The idea seared her, and she rose, slipped into the kitchen, perched on a stool, hands clenched.
For the first time she felt replaceable.
Andrew entered the kitchen, found her eyes shining with unshed tears.
Im scared youll walk out one day, she confessed.
He crouched, took her hands, and, after a pause, asked, Where would I go?
…to them, she whispered, looking away.
He fell silent. In that pause, louder than any protest, was a tremor that shook her to the core.
***
The next night, Andrew simply didnt return. No call, no text, his phone dead in a deadzone. Eleanor sat in the dark kitchen, imagining their life together, replaying countless happy scenariosonly without her.
By dawn her heart had turned to ice. She sat at the laptop, fingers typing automatically, addressing a message to Mabel.
She wrote and wept, not noticing the tears, desperate as a drowning man clutching at a final straw. She poured out love, jealousy, humiliation, pleading for the truth.
When she pressed Send, a strange relief washed over her, followed by an odd emptiness. Shed made her move; now all she could do was wait.
***
All day she paced, waiting, rehearsing the confrontation in her head, practicing every line, touching objects around the flat, mechanically feeding her son, while inside her mind was a constant hum of anticipation.
She waited for the verdict.
Andrew finally trudged in late, pale and gaunt. He took a seat opposite her without a word.
Why did you do that? his voice was weary, tired.
Eleanor tensed.
What did I do?
I read your letter. Youve got it all wrong.
No way! she snapped, the last of her composure cracking. Explain then! Are you going back to them? Old flames never die, they say! So why the silence? Dont hide behind the phone! How did you even read my letter? Did she suggest it? Did she want to expose my weakness?
Its not her answering you, Andrew said quietly. Ill answer you myself. Everything will be fine if you dont ruin it yourself.
Isnt that convenient, Eleanor sneered, a bitter smile playing on her lips. Fine, say nothing more. Ive already wasted my time writing to her.
Mabel died tonight, Andrew exhaled. I was with her until the end.
Eleanors mind stumbled. The room seemed to freeze. Her breath caught, a chill spreading through her.
So she died? she whispered, as if fearing the answer.
Andrew nodded.
It turns out shed been ill for a while, he continued. She was glad I showed up, but she never confessed anything. She just wanted to see how wed get on, with her and Lucy. She wasnt trying to win me back, Eleanor. She only wanted Lucy not to be alone.
He sighed heavily.
Now you see why everything depends on you, he said, eyes fixed on her. If you say no, Ill have to find somewhere for Lucy.
A childrens home? Eleanors voice trembled with horror.
No, of course not. Both Mabels and my own families have relatives. I hope someone will take her in. I cant decide without you.
Eleanor sprang up, shouting so loudly she startled herself. Her daughter will live with us! Understand? With us!
Andrew froze. For a heartbeat he closed his eyes. When he opened them, tears glistened.
I knew I hoped youd say that, he murmured.
Eleanor rushed to him, burying her face against his chest. All the fear and suspicion melted away. Ahead lay a new, messy life, but she no longer feared it.
She had finally chosen.
