Last year, an old friend of mine called and asked if I could host her closest friends at my house for a week. Theyd decided to spend a relaxing holiday by the seaside, in our village. It felt awkward to say no, so I agreed, but I made sure to set things straight from the beginning:
The season is in full swing, so I cant offer them a room for free. But at the same time, I dont feel comfortable charging your friends the usual rate.
My friend replied, Dont worry, dear! Theyll pay. Money isnt a concern; theyre just anxious about being cheated by those who take payments upfront and then kick out guests halfway through their holiday or refuse to let them stay.
Ah well, I was caught off guard. If only Id realised how much this holiday would really cost me, I would never have agreed.
Feeling uneasy, I decided to give them a generous discount. They got a room at half price.
The big day arrived! Instead of the promised family, a teenager showed up accompanied by a ten-year-old boy. It was tricky they were friends, but clearly uncomfortable squashed in a triple room.
Our first meeting was friendly. I cooked a nice meal, and after dinner, showed them the sights in our town. Wishing them well, I went off to my work.
On the second day, their son sprayed water from a toy gun directly at a working television. The parents were in the room, but the prankster wasnt fazed. The couple apologised and promised to pay for repairs, though the TV still hasnt been fixed. I fetched a television from the neighbouring room what else could they do in the evenings?
Next, the friendly family ruined a kettle. The teenager forgot to add any water before turning it on.
Then they started rearranging the room, claiming it was too small. In the process, two legs were broken one from the bedside table, another from the desk. It seemed amusing to them: Ha-ha, youve got loads of furniture like this! Well tape the desk leg back together and all will be well. Well shove something under the table its no big deal.
The climax came with a raucous party that didnt finish until two in the morning, filled with shouting and drunken laughter. When I politely asked to lower the music volume at eleven, I was told, Relax, we paid for this! To their credit, the volume was turned down after I insisted a second time.
Arguing with intoxicated guests was pointless, so I decided to wait until morning. The following day, I had an honest conversation with the couple, making it clear their behaviour was unacceptable. They werent the only ones holidaying here, and I also asked them to be more careful with the appliances.
They shrugged, unimpressed: We paid for our stay. Annoyed, I replied, Thank you for visiting as friends of my friend otherwise, you wouldnt be here!
After that, they behaved more discreetly; nothing else was ruined. Nevertheless, our friendship ended there.
Eventually, we stopped speaking altogether. It didnt stop them from taking the gifts and souvenirs Id prepared for them and our mutual friend. Along with those, they walked out with two large bath towels and a terracotta bedsheet from their room.
I should mention these were my friends best friends. She and I hadnt spoken much since she got married and moved to Cambridge. Shed described her friends as pleasant and well-mannered. If that had truly been the case, they could have spent holidays here every summer.
But thats life. My friend stayed silent for ages, but one day casually mentioned that her friends didnt enjoy the trip: They said you were always picking on them and spoiling the atmosphere, even though theyd paid loads!
Truth is, their payment couldnt cover even a new television, kettle, desk, bedside table, bedsheet, or towels not to mention the strain on my nerves and the complaints from other guests. And this also tarnishes my reputation, which could mean fewer visitors next year.
Still, I gained plenty of experience. Now I know sometimes, its best simply to say no. Being kind and accommodating is admirable, but respecting your own boundaries is even more important.
