Thank you, but I don’t want a holiday like that!
“I’ve got great news!” announced Alex as he stepped into the apartment. “We’re going on vacation!”
Mary, however, didn’t seem thrilled by the news, which even surprised her. Alex had been talking for a while about going on a holiday somewhere by a warm sea, a place she longed to escape to from the chilly and damp London. It seemed like this plan was finally coming together. So where was her excitement?
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Alex seemed to notice his wife’s lack of enthusiasm too. He frowned.
“Mary, what’s up? Changed your mind already?”
“No,” sighed Mary, trying to figure out what was bothering her. “Just… tell me where you’re planning to go?”
Alex eagerly began describing his vision of their vacation. Indonesia, a tropical paradise, untouched islands, dragons…
“Komodo dragons, can you imagine?” he said with excitement. “I’ve always dreamed of seeing them!”
Mary couldn’t imagine. She’d only seen pictures of those dragons online, and they seemed terrifying and dangerous to her. She had zero interest in seeing these giant lizards up close.
“Alex…” she hesitated, “how about Turkey instead? You know, the classic— all-inclusive, hotel, beach, entertainers… a buffet, right? We’re going on vacation, not risking our lives.”
“What do you mean?” Alex frowned again. “There’s no risk. The tours are led by experienced guides, nothing like that will happen.”
Mary just waved her hand. “Nothing,” maybe not, but to her, it wouldn’t be a holiday. She wanted to lounge on a beach, sunbathe, and sip lemonade, not chase dragons with a camera. However, since Alex mostly funded their trips, she often had to listen and agree.
He went on to explain more of his plan— staying in a reed bungalow by the sea, trying local cuisines, taking trips…
Mary only half-listened. Alex, as usual, had already decided everything. Her opinion didn’t matter.
In fact, that was always the way. Alex decided on all sorts of things— which appliances to buy, which nursery to enroll little Johnny in, what color wallpaper to choose. To be fair, he was sensible and good at picking quality. But while Mary didn’t really care about the wallpaper, she couldn’t ignore choices about how they spent their time together.
Until recently, Mary had just agreed with her husband on everything. She drove a red car, though she hated the color. Vacationed in odd places like Snowdonia and the Hebrides, even though she’d rather be on Brighton Beach. She visited water parks instead of botanical gardens, and so on.
At first, Mary tried to convince herself that it was necessary. That Alex was trying to broaden her horizons, pull her out of her comfort zone, and all that.
Alex was, indeed, very energetic— as long as she had known him. Open to new trends, fashions, and hobbies. Mary, on the other hand, was quite conservative. But her parents admired how much new and exciting stuff Alex brought into their lives. There was no arguing with the three of them.
Eventually, she stopped arguing altogether. Tried to love the lifestyle imposed on her. She took up skiing under Alex’s guidance. Nearly broke her leg, but even a day in A&E didn’t convince Alex that she wasn’t athletic. She even started swimming, although she never liked water and at the beach only dipped her toes in.
There were many examples like these. Initially, these new activities brought some novelty to her life, but gradually, the excitement faded to monotony.
Mary didn’t understand what was happening to her. Alex was still as active and enthusiastic as ever, brimming with new, increasingly wild ideas that he managed to make happen. And Mary just followed along as if tied to him.
At times, she felt literally tied down. As if she weren’t an independent person anymore, just an attachment who had to think like Alex, love what he loved, and so on.
“Fine,” she finally sighed wearily. “You’ve already decided and planned everything. How about asking me?”
Alex just shrugged. “I do it for your sake, and you don’t appreciate it!”
“And what would happen if I did ask you?” said her husband. “You’d drag me to boring old Margate!”
“Boring old?” shouted Mary. “When did we ever even go there?”
Alex opened his mouth to respond but didn’t get the chance as Mary continued:
“Have you ever asked me where I want to go on holiday, how I want to live, what car I want to drive?! No! You decided everything! Mary this, Mary that, do it this way, take up that hobby, for what? For your convenience? To impress your friends? ‘Look at my wife, the brilliant athlete, see how we align on everything?’ Is that it? To fulfill your dreams? Did you ask about mine? Thanks, but I don’t want a holiday like that!”
Mary paused. A lump caught in her throat, and tears threatened to spill.
“But I do love you…” Alex seemed confused, upset by this unexpected outburst from his usually calm wife.
“When you love someone, you don’t act like this!” Mary retorted sharply. “When you love someone, you ask what they want. What their dreams are—not just inflate your own ego!”
Feeling the tears welling up, Mary hurried from the room.
“That’s it, she’s done! Let him photograph his bugs and dragons if they’re more important than his wife!”
***
Mary sat in the kitchen, silently looking out the window. She had mostly settled down, at least stopped crying. She’d thought quite a bit of bad about her husband, felt angry, cried, got angry again. She seemed calm now, but some resentment and pain lingered.
She heard the door open, and a second later, Alex appeared in the kitchen entrance. In silence, he placed some papers on the table.
“What’s this?” Mary looked up at her husband, blinking with surprise.
“New tickets,” said Alex calmly. “I’ve swapped them. We’re flying to Bournemouth.”
“Really?” Mary smiled, thinking how pointless her years of silent patience had been.
She blinked, full of gratitude, as he hugged her and placed a kiss on the top of her head.
“Sorry, I was being foolish. I love you, Mary…”
