Son, I dont want you to get divorced because of me! Take me to a care home!
Half a year ago, I brought my mum to live with us. Shes quite elderly now, 83 years old. Since Dad passed away, it has been hard for her to live on her own in the countryside. My own children are grown up and have moved out, so its just been me and my wife in our two-bedroom flat in Manchester. I thought bringing Mum to live with us wouldnt be a big issue.
At first, my wife didnt say anything, but within a week or so, Mums presence clearly began to get on her nerves.
Look, can she eat separately, after weve finished? my wife asked.
Whys that? I replied.
Its just easier. I lose my appetite watching her chew without her teeth. It honestly puts me off my food.
Come on, well all get old one day.
Its different.
My wife also got annoyed by Mums stomach problems, and the fact that she snores quite loudly at night. She told Mum not to come into the kitchen, and eventually didnt want her leaving her room at all. One day, she turned to me and said:
Look, I didnt realise shed be staying here for so long. I just cant take it any more.
What do you want me to do? I asked.
Send her back to the village.
But she cant manage on her own!
Loads of people get by like that. I dont see anyone else fussing over their parents! Why should I feel like a stranger in my own home, having to put up with all that noise and the smell?
I honestly didnt know what to do. Then just a few days ago, I came home to find Mum dressed, suitcase in hand, waiting in the hallway.
Mum, what are you doing?
Son, please take me to a care home!
But why? What on earth for?
I dont want you and your wife to split up because of me.
Mum keeps pleading with me. I have no idea what to do. I just cant imagine living comfortably, knowing Mum is in a care home. Maybe itd be best to give up everything and move to the countryside with her? I really dont know whats the right thing to do.
