Emily, love, youre turning thirtytwo today! Im so proud of you, and Ive got you a little something, said Margaret Thompson, her mum, handing over a pair of knitted baby booties shed made at her craft class. Emily stared at her mum, eyes wide. Right, thirtytwo time to think about having a grandchild, isnt it? Im not getting any younger, and neither are you. Id love to have a few greatgrandkids to dote on. My friends are already buzzing about their greatgrandchildren, and here I am, a lonely old lady with no grandchildren at all.
Emily flushed. The room fell silent. The two of Margarets friends and the three neighbours at the table all turned their gazes on her.
Sorry, I need to sit down, Im feeling a bit faint, Emily muttered, slipping away from the table. She didnt want anyone to see the tears in her eyes it hurt badly that her own mother kept drumming the ticking clock in her head.
The clock keeps ticking and whats the point? Raising a child when the only nanny youve got is a pensioner mum who cant offer much? Emily didnt even have a bloke in mind, let alone anyone willing to tie the knot.
Honestly, girls, I dont know what to do If you had sons, Emily might have been set up. But all you lot are just getting married off. Its a proper oldfashioned village here! Margaret vented.
Emily lived with her mum in a tiny twobed flat in a small market town. Shed never had a serious relationship, and the idea of family life felt like something out of a romance novel. She worked at the post office, hauling parcels all day, sorting letters and helping customers at the counter. The job left her back aching, and shed come home exhausted, craving nothing more than a bite to eat, then a couch, a nap, and a chance to stop thinking.
Right, there you go again, lying about, Margaret said, peering at Emily sprawled like a seal on the sofa. Come on, lets go to the poetry night! Youre young and pretty why not find a nice man? she chided.
Mum, leave me be. Im trying to rest, Emily snapped.
Margaret, despite being in her early seventies, was a bundle of energy she sang at the community centre, drove to the county town for activist meetings, met up with other pensioners to read her own poems. She was always on the go, preaching the importance of helping others and staying busy. If shed had grandchildren, shed have had enough stamina for them; Emily, on the other hand, felt completely drained.
Undeterred, Margaret kept shaking those bright red booties in front of Emily, trying to get her attention.
Enough with the shaking, Mum. Its like waving a red flag at a bull! Emily complained.
Emily, sweetheart, listen youre an adult now, its time to think about children. Id love to see grandkids before I go.
Honestly, Mum, Im not sure I even want to think about that. My job is tough, the pay is tiny, my back hurts, and were barely getting along as it is. Kids? No thank you. Thank God the days over.
Yes, exactly, Margaret sighed, but maybe you could live a little differently. Not just work and the sofa. You know, I was just at Mrs. Stevens house her granddaughter is brilliant
I get it, Mum! Emily shot back, a little sharper than intended. But I cant just get pregnant because you want grandkids. Id have to get married, and look Ive had no suitors. There was Tom once, but you turned him down!
Emily tossed her hand, remembering when James had courted her. He was a good lad, from a solid family, but Margaret had said no straight away, Stay home, dont go out with boys. So James ended up with Emilys only friend, who wasnt as picky about suitors. Six months ago that friend gave birth to Jamess third child. Theyre doing fine, all happy, no one lounging on a sofa eating pies and drowning the boredom in tea with four spoons of sugar.
James you remember him, dont you? Margaret whispered. There are other men out there, you just need to get out of the house.
I shouldve left earlier, Mum! When I wanted to study in the city, you said I couldnt go alone, that the streets were full of crooks. You pushed me into a technical college for a course you chose, saying technicians are always needed. I hated physics, nearly flunked the second year!
You just didnt try hard enough, Margaret retorted.
Better if youd thrown me out! Instead, you sent me to the most useless course just to fill a class. Why waste my time on electrical engineering? What good does it do at the post office?
The post office is steady work, Emily. Its close to home, you can pop in for lunch. Isnt that nice? Margaret tried again.
Mom! Maybe its a dream for some, but it doesnt inspire me.
Then youll have kids
No, Mum. I dont want to have children if I cant give them a decent life. I dont want my own daughter ending up stuck in a job she hates, counting down to retirement.
Margaret stared, hurt and bewildered. She hadnt realised that this was the breaking point, that her vivacious daughter had turned into a resigned one.
I tried so hard to give you a better life, so youd never want for anything! And this is your thanks? You wont even give me grandkids for joy! she shouted, tears welling.
Maybe you could get a job yourself? Youve got energy, you could be a nanny. Then we could even afford a little holiday Ive never left our little town, maybe I could see the sea someday. They say the worlds bigger than the road from my house to the post office.
Margaret shook her head. Where would I even go?
Even to Jamess place! Theyve got money, kids aplenty. Go on, have a go!
To Jamess? Margaret muttered, sinking into her chair. God help me, Id never be taken on as a nanny by a bunch of strangers.
Try it. They wont charge you for a request, Emily snorted. She knew her mum would never consider working for James after shed shut him out so firmly.
And thats how it turned out.
Time passed. Margaret stopped waving those booties, focused on her own community activities. At a seniors meeting in the county centre, the topic drifted to young peoples family woes, and she, halfinadvertently, started telling strangers how her daughter drifts through life with no ambition.
Looks like I raised a weed, now Im reaping the harvest, she complained bitterly.
What you sow, you reap. What did you give her besides advice and nagging? A flat? A good education? A chance at a love life? a fellow senior asked.
Can I help her? My husband left when I got pregnant. I did it all on my own! Margaret muttered.
Why have children if you couldnt support them? You didnt need to become a mother if you couldnt provide. Now youre blaming her for following in your footsteps, living on a postmans salary? Well done, mother of the year! a stranger snapped. Margaret, stung, said a few angry words and left the tea after the meeting.
The whole evening she felt off. Memories flashed: forbidding Emily from riding horses on the farm because it was dangerous; stopping her seeing James, calling him not serious; dictating what to wear and where to go; banning her from dancing with friends because there are drunken blokes there. Shed never let her go to the city for the course she loved, saying it was unsafe, that shed abandon her mother and home.
All those moments piled up. Emilys life had been lived under her mothers wing, turning love into overprotectiveness. Her own wishes were smothered.
Margaret sighed, realizing shed built that cage herself. She decided something had to change, and fast.
The next day she knocked on the door of the neighbour who was friends with Jamess wife, asking if they needed a babysitter. Weve got three little ones now and could use an extra hand. Are you looking for work? the neighbour asked.
I am. If they need me, Ill gladly start.
They took her on. The job was hard but she loved it three youngsters, a decent wage, and a chance to feel useful again.
When Emily heard her mum had found work, she was surprised and relieved. Margaret no longer hovered with endless questions; she came home exhausted, fell asleep, and eventually earned enough to fund a holiday for Emily.
When the time came to buy a travel voucher, Margaret bought just one for Emilys birthday.
Emily, youre thirtythree today! Happy birthday, love. Lifes only just beginning. Heres a ticket go see the world, meet people. Youve always been there for me, now its your turn.
Emily looked at the ticket, then at her mum, stood up, and gave Margaret a tight hug.
Thank you, Mum. Ill go, I really will. My lifes just starting, theres still so much ahead.
Emily finally took a proper break, returned refreshed, and decided she didnt want to be a plant stuck in the pot any longer. She started studying accounting. Her first clients were James and his wife. They got on well, and word spread. Soon other local business owners asked her to handle their books. She earned enough to travel and enjoy a life far beyond the dull routine of pies and television.
Three years later Emily met Simon. They adopted a little boy from a childrens home, and a year after that Emily discovered she was pregnant. Let them call it a late baby, she laughed. She knew her future was still wide open, and she wasnt going to listen to anyone else. Everything fell into place, and even Margarets dream came true shes now a proud grandmother to two grandchildren and couldnt be happier.
