Just the other day, a mate of mine popped round for a cuppa. We were sat at the kitchen table, having a good old chinwag about life, when I said, Hang on, Ill just do the washing upback in a mo.
The way he looked at me, youd think Id announced I was building a rocket in the garden. With a mix of admiration and confusion, he said, Good on ya for helping your wife out. I dont bothermine never thanks me anyway. Last week, I mopped the floor, and she didnt even say ta.
I sat back down and explained that I wasnt *helping* my wife. Truth is, my wife doesnt *need* helpshe needs a partner. Im not doing chores as a favour; Im pulling my weight because this is my home too.
I dont *help* my wife cleanbecause I live here, and mess bothers me too.
I dont *help* my wife cookbecause I like eating, so Id best pitch in.
I dont *help* my wife wash upbecause those plates? I used em.
I dont *help* my wife with the kidsbecause theyre *my* kids, and being their dad is my job.
I dont *help* with the laundrybecause those clothes? Half of em are mine.
I dont *help out* at home. I *live* here. This is my house too.
Then I asked him, When was the last time *you* thanked *her* for scrubbing the loo, doing the school run, folding your socks, or cooking your dinner? And I dont mean a mumbled cheersI mean a proper, Blimey, youre amazing!
Bit awkward now, innit? Feels odd when you think about it like that, doesnt it? You mop *once*, and suddenly youre expecting a medal. But why? Maybe because somewhere along the line, youve been told all this is *her* job. Or maybe you reckon it all just magically sorts itself out while she barely lifts a finger?
If you want thanks, give thanks. Step up. Be a proper partnernot a bloke who just shows up to eat, sleep, shower, and scratch that itch. This isnt a B&B. Its your home.
Real change starts at home. Lets raise our lads and lasses to know what being an equal partner really means.
