A Lesson in Partnership
Just the other day, a mate of mine popped over for a brew. As we sat in the kitchen chatting about life, I mentioned, “Ill just do the washing-upback in a tick.”
He looked at me as if Id announced I was building a time machine. With a mix of awe and confusion, he said, “Thats decent of you, helping your wife out. I dont bothermine never thanks me. Last week, I mopped the floor, and not so much as a cheers from her.”
I sat back down and explained that I wasnt “helping” my wife at all. Truth is, she doesnt need helpshe needs a partner. Im her equal in running the household, not some bloke doing her a favour.
I dont “help” with the cleaning because I live here too, and mess doesnt tidy itself.
I dont “help” with the cooking because I like eating, so Id better pitch in.
I dont “help” with the dishes because Ive eaten off those plates as well.
I dont “help” with the kids because theyre my children toobeing their dad is my job.
I dont “help” with the laundry because those clothes belong to me and my little ones just as much.
Im not a guest in my own home. This isnt a hotel where I just eat, sleep, and expect service. Its my house too.
Then I asked him: “When was the last time your wife scrubbed the loo, changed the sheets, bathed the kids, cooked dinner, or folded laundryand you said, Thanks, love, youre brilliant?” Not just a muttered “ta,” but real appreciation: “Blimey, youre amazing!”
Does that sound odd? Are you shifting uncomfortably? You mop once and expect a medalbut why? Maybe because our bloke-ish culture taught you its “her job.” Or that it all magically happens while she lifts a finger?
Start praising her the way youd want praise. Be a proper partner, not a lodger whos just there for meals and a good time. Act like you belongbecause you do.
Real change starts at home. Lets raise our sons and daughters to know what true partnership means.
