My Thrifty Friends Invited Me to Their Birthday Party—But I Went Home Hungry

My thrifty friends invited me round for a birthday party. I came home hungry.

I have a group of friends I jokingly call ‘the thrifty bunch’. They cut corners on just about everythingfood, clothes, even little luxuries. Its not that theyre short on money; actually, theyre quite well-off and never seem to be strapped for cash. They could easily afford plenty more if they fancied it.

I only see them when theres a special occasion; otherwise, we just chat on the phone. About a month ago, they invited me to a birthday celebration. I went, but ended up heading home with my stomach rumbling.

On the morning of the party, I popped the present Id bought into my handbag and set off to work. Theyd said to come round at four in the afternoon. Since it was the middle of the day, I thought Id better not eat much beforehand and just had a coffee and a couple of biscuits for lunch. To be honest, Id left myself a bit hungry, expecting there’d be plenty of food at the party.

I arrived at their house just before the agreed time, handed over my present, and wished them happiness and good health. I joked that I was absolutely starving, having skipped lunch especially for the occasion. My friend chuckled and assured me everything was ready.

There were six guests plus our hosts. As I walked into the lounge, I straight away noticed there was no dining table set up. Theyd decided to have a buffet instead. There werent any chairs, save for a little sofa, so all eight of us ended up squeezing on it. Honestly, after a long workday, Id have loved a proper meal at a dining table, but there we were on the couch with a buffet.

My friend set out a tiny round table with nibbles, and it was then that I regretted only having those two biscuits for lunch.

On the tableyes, I counted the slices and Im not ashamedwere a handful of small plates. Each plate held exactly eight slices: eight thin slices of smoked sausage (my favourite!), eight slices of ham, eight slices of cheese. There were fresh tomatoes and cucumbers, also cut into eight delicate slices. Everything sliced razor-thin and arranged just-so. There were two miniature bowls of salad and, equally rationed, enough fruit for the eight of us. The pièce de résistance was a single bottle of wine. In short, Help yourselves, dear guests.

I sat there nibbling on my bit of sausage and cheese, still as hungry as ever! I didnt even fancy a drink, knowing full well itd go straight to my head on an empty stomach. One friend cheerfully announced, Ill bring out something hot. I dared to hope Id finally get something more substantial. The hostess soon appeared with the ‘hot meal’.

On the serving dish were tiny roasted potatoes and chicken drumsticksone of each for every person! It was almost comical. At least the birthday cake was a decent size. All in all, we had a good laugh and enjoyed ourselves.

After an hour and a half, I left for home, famished. On the way back, I popped into the shop to pick up a proper dinner. Once home, I made myself a satisfying meal.

So thats how my thrifty friends managed to pinch pennies with their party spread.

Honestly, Im left wondering: whats the point of inviting people round for your birthday if you dont want, or cant be bothered, to host them properly?

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My Thrifty Friends Invited Me to Their Birthday Party—But I Went Home Hungry