My mum and I recently had a massive argument. We both live in the same flat, and for years shes been trying to get me to move out. She hasn’t succeeded because Im legally registered here. I can’t even count how many different reasons shes given over time. And I just wanted to keep a good relationship with my family.
Maybe youll think it’s odd to be living with your mum at thirty. Honestly, I agree, but when my husband and I got married, we genuinely had no other option. Then the boys arrived, and moving was the last thing on our minds.
Money is a constant struggle. My job pays very little, and my husband works from home, but his work comes and goessometimes he has no projects for weeks, and his earnings are all over the place. We’re barely keeping up with the car payments, but we needed wheels for the family. Mum is rather unimpressed with this, too.
Thats why we’re still sharing a flat with my mum. Oddly enough, splitting the bills for utilities and food makes life easier. Plus, I can always leave the boys with her, which is such a help. But these past couple of years, Mums been relentless, constantly dropping hints that we should get our own place and move out.
Id really love to, but where could we scrape together the money? At first, she was subtle, and I kept calmly explaining that it simply wasnt possible right now, but that we were gradually saving up. Eventually, it overwhelmed me and now, were always arguing about it.
My husband keeps out of ithe doesnt want trouble with his mother-in-law, and I actually get that, although I could do with his support.
What can he do, though? The only real solution would be buying a flat, but we absolutely cant afford it until the cars paid off.
I do understand Mum wants some peace and quiet in her later years, but that doesnt mean she should push us out of the flat. Besides, shes told me more than once that she plans to leave the flat to me, so whats the point in making us move now?
Then, just recently, we really fell out and now were not speaking. The reason is that my aunt passed away and left her a one-bedroom flat.
I thought, at last, this was fantastic newsMum could move into a smaller flat of her own and finally get the quiet shes wanted.
But Mum flatly refused to move, and she wont let us have the other flat, either. She told us we have to figure things out for ourselves.
Is that normal? How are we supposed to keep talking after this?
