I always knew my mother-in-law was a piece of work, but even in my wildest dreams, I never imagined shed turn up to my wedding in white.
The dress was practically bridallong, lacy, and figure-hugging. She swept into the registry office like it was her personal catwalk. While the guests whispered, she just smirked and said, “Well, its a celebration for all of us, isnt it?”
The first red flag? She insisted on riding in the same car as us. “What, am I a stranger now?” she huffed, plonking herself next to my groom. I ended up squeezed in the back. Lovely start, really.
At the ceremony, she planted herself right beside us, as if she were the third wheel in our marriage. In every photo, her hand was on my husbands shoulder, her face closer to the camera than mine. At one point, she even adjusted my veil and whispered, “Its all lopsidedlet me fix it properly.”
The reception was worse. She bossed the music, complained to the waiters about the “underseasoned salad,” and kept pulling my husband aside for hushed chatslike she needed to remind him whose son he was.
Then came the pièce de résistance: her toast. “Wishing you happiness,” she began, before adding, “Though honestly, I thought my son wouldve chosen differently. But since he has, well cheers.”
The room fell silent. I smiled through gritted teeth while my blood boiled.
Enough was enough. Time to end this circus.
I sidled up to her with a glass of red wineostensibly to “make peace,” clink glasses, snap a photo. As she leaned in, I “accidentally” knocked my hand against hers.
Splash. Crimson streaks all over her pristine white dress.
“Oh dear!” she gasped, dabbing at the stain. “How clumsy of you!”
I sweetly suggested, “Theres a mirror and tissues in the loo. Pop in and see if it comes out.”
Off she went. I followed, waited until she was in a stall, then quietly clicked the latch shut from the outside.
Returning to the party, I announced, “Mums gone homeshe wasnt feeling well. Asked not to be disturbed.”
Suddenly, the evening was lighter. The guests laughed, the music played, and for the first time all day, I actually felt like the bridenot just an extra in someone elses family drama.
Zero regrets. Though something tells me life with her will be entertaining.
