My husband’s a sofa king, while the neighbor’s an actual hero. Why is life so unfair?
I’m just twenty-eight and my husband is thirty-seven. We’re a young family with two lovely children. You’d think living in the 21st century would make things modern, but honestly, sometimes it feels like we’ve reverted to some old-fashioned time. My John sticks to the outdated belief that a man should earn the money, while a woman should cook and take out the rubbish. Isn’t it absurd?
When we got married, I hoped we’d be partners in life, in managing our home, and in caring for our children. I imagined there’d be no labels like “that’s not a man’s job” or “handle it yourself.” Unfortunately, John believes it’s beneath him to pick up a dusting cloth or even switch on the washing machine. He doesn’t mind dusting once a month if I beg. But making breakfast for the kids? That’s beyond his understanding. As if the frying pan might bite him.
In this scenario, I cannot help but tell you about a person who truly fills me with admiration. Our neighbor. Yes, just an ordinary guy living in the same block. His name is Tom.
Tom and Lisa, a young couple in their thirties, live a floor above. Lisa is a career-driven woman, working for a big international company, holding a high position, and driving a luxury car. She’s always confident, elegant, on the move, handling business.
Meanwhile, Tom is currently between jobs. And you know what he does? He’s an amazing dad and husband! When their baby was born, he didn’t turn to the bottle or hide behind the TV. He went on parental leave! Yes, he did.
And you wouldn’t believe how well he manages everything! He strolls with the pram in the mornings, then cooks porridge, washes baby clothes, tidies up, and even cooks lunch. He’s like a superhero in a home apron. Their baby is the picture of happiness. Tom doesn’t dream of being anywhere else – he lives for his family.
When Lisa comes home, she always approaches him with a smile. I watch them and feel a twinge of envy. They resemble a picture-perfect marriage: in love, respecting each other, and tackling everything together from nappies to holiday plans.
One day, when I saw him mopping the floor while singing to the baby in the crib, it tugged at my heartstrings. Not because my husband is bad, but because he doesn’t want to be like that. He believes that caring for the home is beneath a real man.
Sometimes, I hint at John: look how Tom is walking with his son, or how he prepares dinner. He just scoffs and says, “Well, if he’s got nothing better to do,” or “Soon Lisa will get tired of him – women find such submissive men dull.” It makes me want to scream.
It’s laughable and sad: is caring truly a weakness? Is love only about paying bills?
I don’t expect John to make gourmet soups or embroider cushions. I just wish he’d occasionally say, “I’ll handle it, take a break.” Or surprise me with breakfast in bed once a week. Or simply hold the youngest and say, “Go, take a nap.” But no. He believes it’s a woman’s role. He’s the breadwinner.
So, when I see Tom, I feel like applauding. Not because he’s better than my husband. But because he’s different. Because he knows how to love in deeds, not just words. Because he’s not afraid to be “different,” despite societal norms. Because he has the courage – to simply be a good person.
Maybe someday John will realize that love isn’t just about earning money. That a woman’s happiness isn’t just a bunch of flowers on Mother’s Day, but attention every day. Meanwhile, I just hope my children have a father like Tom is to his son.
Because true masculinity isn’t the strength of your arms, but the strength of your heart. And, unfortunately, not everyone has learned that.
