My Husband Maintains a Lively Correspondence with an Old Female Friend – Even Now, He Still Shares Everything with Her and Seeks Her Advice

Author Wanda MirandaReading 2 minViews 3

I consider myself incredibly lucky to have a husband. Hes nearly the perfect man for me! But, as Ive come to realise over time, no one is truly perfect. My husband, as wonderful as he is, has one little flaw: hes a bit too sociable, rather open, and always very friendly. Now, some might say this isnt much of a problem, but…

James is friends with women. He doesnt hide any of their correspondence from me, and theres nothing suspicious in it, but I can’t say I’m comfortable with it. For years now, he has kept up a lively exchange of emails with an old colleague. Emily got married ages ago and moved abroad with her husband, but somehow shes never disappeared from our lives. To this day, her name still pops up in our home.

Whenever something unusual or worth mentioning happens to him at work or on a trip, two women always hear about it straightaway: me, and his old friend Emily. If he has an important decision to make, he discusses it not just with me, but also with her. James talks everything over with Emily. Every now and then, he chats with her about things that really ought to be just between the two of us! Frankly, it leaves me a bit exasperated.

I want to stress again that he is a terrific husband. We share every household chore 50-50. Hes got a good job and brings in a decent wage. We make time to do things together, whether its catching a show in the West End, going out for dinner, or watching a film. Yet still, I cant quite understand why he feels the need to stay so close with another woman.

Maybe Im being silly, but I cant help feeling a touch jealous, just about Emily. Ive never felt this way about any of the other women he works with.

I honestly dont know what hes missing. Why does he need that friendship?

My Son Spent Years Searching for the Right Woman to Marry—At 30, He Finally Found His Perfect Match in Alice. I Supported His Choice, but Now Their Marriage Is Falling Apart, and I’m Not Sure If I Made Things Worse by Urging Him to Leave Almost every day, I heard about how lovely and beautiful Alice was. My son was truly smitten with her, and I liked her too. He passionately told me and his friends about her wonderful qualities—she seemed to be the perfect woman for him, so he married her without hesitation. As a loving mum, I fully supported his choice. Planning a wedding can be a real challenge, but my friends were absolute stars. The bride’s parents were delightful, and we got on famously from the start. At first, everything was perfect, but over time, things began to change. Their marriage started falling apart, and arguments became more frequent. I knew it was only their first year of marriage and hoped things would improve, but I worried about them—I just wanted them to be happy together. One evening really shook me. Late at night, my son arrived at my door with his things, saying he had nowhere else to go because Alice had kicked him out. He spent a few days with me, and Alice never came round to try to work things out. This happened again and again. When my daughter-in-law told me she was pregnant, I decided it was time for a chat with them. I just wanted to offer some advice to help them avoid misunderstandings in the future. It only made things worse. Their arguments became even more frequent, and my son stayed over at my place more often. I could see he was struggling—he wasn’t the happy man he used to be; there was disappointment in his eyes. I couldn’t stand seeing my son so unhappy in his marriage. I suggested he think carefully about whether it was worth staying together. He could still be a wonderful father even if he lived apart. Soon after, he filed for divorce. Not long after, Alice came to me for help, asking me to persuade my son to withdraw the divorce papers—she didn’t want the family to fall apart. I’d already advised her more than once to focus on her marriage. Now I’m accused of interfering in their relationship. I don’t know if I did the right thing by urging my son to divorce. His wife doesn’t like me, and he’s grown more distant from me as well. But maybe they still love each other? Living apart feels wrong, but living together isn’t working out either.

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SAMHSA – Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration

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Federal Info Line: 1-800-522-5006

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My Husband Maintains a Lively Correspondence with an Old Female Friend – Even Now, He Still Shares Everything with Her and Seeks Her Advice