You wouldnt believe what happened when my brother, Matthew, finished uni. He moved off to a completely different city for work one of those places miles from home, you know? The plan was only to stay there for a year, put some money aside, and then come back to buy a flat here. But, as youd expect, life had other plans in store. Not long after he got there, he met a girl. One thing led to another, they fell in love, and next thing, they decided to get married. So my brother ended up staying there for good. Funny thing is, none of us had met his wife.
When they were getting married, I was actually nine months pregnant and about ready to pop, so there was no way I could travel for the wedding. Dad couldn’t get any time off work either, so in the end, only Mum went. She didnt really get to know Matthews wife, just sort of met her, exchanged a few polite words, and that was that. After the wedding and a little honeymoon, Mum came back home. She did mention that the girl was very pretty, always smiling and seemed perfectly pleasant. Years went by, though, and the rest of us still hadnt laid eyes on my sister-in-law.
Anyway, this year Matthew let us know guess what he and his wife had planned this big trip. The first stop was coming to visit us. Then theyd be going to a mate from works wedding, catching up at Matthews school reunion after that, seeing her parents down by the seaside, and finally heading home. They were going to stay at ours for a couple of days. I honestly wasnt bothered our flats not massive, but my in-laws have a little holiday cottage and they were happy for us to use it. Sure, its a bit shabby and could do with a lick of paint, but its perfectly liveable.
I was actually looking forward to it good mood, ready for guests, you know. They arrived and basically, thats when it all started to go a bit pear-shaped.
Matthew introduced us. Literally, from the moment I met her, she started moaning: the journey was too hot, too noisy, too cramped, you name it. Then we went over to the cottage, and honestly, you should have seen her face when she saw the bathroom and shower she looked like shed been handed a week-old ham sandwich by a stranger at the bus stop. She dragged Matthew off for a quiet word, and then he asked my husband if he could drive them back into town. She absolutely refused to use the shower at the cottage. So off they went to ours, she had a proper wash, fixed her makeup, and came back.
Next came dinner. Wed made a real effort tried to cook something special and everything but nope. She wouldnt touch anything wed prepared. There was gluten, fat, or who knows what else in the food cant even remember now. In the end, she just picked at some veg, even though she eyed that suspiciously too. She didnt fancy the room wed got ready for them to sleep in either, so we ended up going back to the flat in town for the night.
The following day we took them for a wander around the city, but honestly, she was fussier than my three-year-old. Too hot legs hurt bored nothing was right. I was honestly so relieved to wave them off at the end of it all. And all I could think was, how on earth has my brother put up with her all these years? Two days, and she nearly finished us off!
