“Mum, why dont we just let Gran go and get lost? Itd be better for everyone,” Emily said defiantly.
“Mum, how much longer do I have to put up with this? Now youll hold this over me forever?” Emily, fifteen and sulky, folded her arms.
“Not forever, just while shes living with us. If she wanders out, shell get lost and”
“And die under a park bench, and well live with the guilt Mum, why not just let her?” Emilys voice was sharp.
“Let her what?” Mum frowned.
“Let her go and get lost. You said yourself youre sick of dealing with her.”
“How can you say that? Shes my mother-in-lawnot my own motherbut shes still your gran.”
“Gran?” Emily narrowed her eyes, the way she always did when she was angry. “Where was she when her precious son walked out on us? When she refused to look after meher own granddaughter? She never spared you a thought when you were working yourself to the bone to make ends meet. She even blamed you when Dad left!”
“Stop it right now!” Mum snapped. “I shouldnt have told you any of this. Ive raised you wrong if you cant feel an ounce of pity for your own family. It terrifies me. When I grow old, will you treat me the same way? Whats happened to you? You used to be so kindyoud bring home every stray kitten or puppy you found. But Gran isnt a stray!” Mum sighed, shaking her head. “Shes already been punished enough. Your father didnt just abandon ushe abandoned her too.”
“Mum, youll be late for work. I promise Ill lock the door.” Emily looked down guiltily.
“Fine. Weve both said too much already.” But Mum didnt move.
“Mum, Im sorry, but it hurts to look at you. Skin and bones. Youre only forty, but you walk like an old woman, barely dragging your feet. Always exhausted. Why are you looking at me like that? Who else will tell you the truth but your own daughter?” Emily hadnt realised her voice had risen again.
“Thanks for that. Just make sure she doesnt leave the gas on or the taps running.”
“See? Thats exactly what I meanwere tied to her, no life of our own. Mum, lets put her in a care home. Shed be looked after properly. She doesnt understand anything anymore”
“Not this again!” Mum cut her off.
“Itd be better for everyone, especially her,” Emily pressed, ignoring Mums irritation.
“I dont want to hear another word. Im not sending her away. How much longer does she have? Let her stay at home.”
“Shell outlive both of us. Go to work. I wont go anywhereIll lock the door, I promise,” Emily muttered darkly.
“Im sorry. I shouldnt have put all this on you. All your friends are out having fun, and youre stuck looking after Gran.”
They hadnt noticed Grans door was slightly ajar. Shed heard everything, though she probably didnt understandor would forget in a minute.
Mum left for work, and Emily went to what used to be her room, now Grans.
“Gran, do you need something?”
Grans gaze was blank.
“Come on, Ill give you a sweet.” Emily helped her up and led her to the kitchen.
“Who are you?” Gran stared at her vacantly.
“Have your tea.” Emily sighed, placing a chocolate on the table.
Gran loved sweets. She and Mum used to hide them, only giving her one with her tea. Emily watched as Gran fumbled with the wrapper. Her thin grey hair barely hid her pale scalp. Emily looked away.
Gran used to dye her hair, pile it high, paint her lips bright red, and arch her brows. Emily remembered the sickly-sweet smell of her perfume. Men had always noticed Granuntil her mind began to slip.
Emily couldnt decide what she felt for her: pity, resentment, guilt? A knock at the door snapped her out of it.
“Must be Mum forgetting something,” she muttered, going to answer.
But it was her friend, sixth-former James. Mum didnt approve of him, so he only came when she wasnt home.
“Hey. Why so early? Mum just left,” Emily whispered.
“I know. She didnt see me.”
“Millie!” Grans voice carried from the kitchen.
“Whos Millie?” James asked.
“Thats what she calls Mumthinks shes her daughter. Ill take her back to her room. Go hide in the loo. Shes having a good day today.” Emily nudged him toward the bathroom.
“No ones here.” Emily walked into the kitchen to find an empty cup and a crumpled wrapper.
“I want tea,” Gran said.
“But” Emily gave up. Gran forgot things instantly, especially recent ones, though she remembered the distant past clearly. Sometimes she confused everything, didnt recognise them. But there were rare moments of claritywas this one? Or was she just angling for another sweet?
Emily sighed, refilled the cup, and set out another chocolate. Gran struggled with the wrapper. When the tea was gone, Emily led her back to bed.
“Sleep now,” she said, closing the door.
James peered out from the bathroom.
“Can I come out?”
“Yeah. Kitchen.” Emily checked the door was shut and followed him.
They sat close, sharing earbuds, nodding along to music. Emily didnt notice Gran slip into the hallway
When she went to see James out, the front door was open. She rushed to Grans roomempty.
“The door I didnt lock it. Shes gone. Mumll think I did it on purpose,” Emily whimpered.
“Why would she think that?” James asked.
“You dont get it. I literally said today itd be better if she got lost. Mumll think I left it open to spite her.”
“Alright, grab your coat. Well look for her. She cant have gone far.”
Emily glanced at the coat rackGrans quilted jacket was still there. So were her shoes.
“Did she go out in slippers and a dressing gown?” Emily stared at James.
“Maybe shes with the neighbours? Got confused on the landing Ill check outside, you ask around.” James ran downstairs.
No one answered their doors. Emily gave up and sprinted outside. James was scouring the playground, checking under bushes and slides.
“Nowhere. Lets try the next streets. You go right, Ill go left. Whoever finds her first calls the other. Meet back here,” James ordered, dashing off.
Emily even checked the bus stop. No sign. How long had she been gone? Half an hour? Forty minutes? How far could she get in slippers?
“We should call the police,” Emily said.
“Wait. Thinkwhat did she talk about most? Where did she like to go?” James panted.
Emily frowned but couldnt recall anything useful. She shrugged.
“Fine, wider search. You head toward school, Ill go the other way.”
Not all streetlights worked. Emily hurried past dark patches, sure someone was hiding behind bushes. Near the school, she suddenly rememberedGran once told a story about forgetting her exercise book, climbing out a window, nearly breaking her leg.
She pushed the school gateunlocked. The building was a typical redbrick, shaped like a “U.” Rounding a corner, she spotted a group of lads laughing at someone. “Gran!” Emily sprinted over.
Gran stood in her blue dressing gown. One lad dangled an empty wrapper. When she reached for it, he snatched it back, and they roared.
“Shes not all there, is she? Escape from the loony bin? Want a sweet?” He taunted.
“Leave her alone!” Emily shouted.
The lads turned.
“Look, another one!”
“Whore you? Granddaughter?”
“Escaped together, did you?”
“This ones not bad. Want a sweet?” The lad swaggered toward Emily.
The others closed in.
Emily stepped back. They blocked her off from Gran, no longer laughing, just leering, feeding off her fear. She backed into the fence. The gate was too far. As one, they lunged.
Emily flailed, but there were three of them. One grabbed her wrists, the others pinned her to the fence, hands groping, deciding whod go first
“Oi! Back off!” Jamess voice cut through.
Two lads retreated, but the third kept hold. James threw himself at them. Emily kicked her captor, and he howled, letting go. She snatched up a scrap of wood, swung at one lads backtoo short to reach his head.
He swore, lunged
