The Bitter Disillusionment of Love, Without Warning
I hadnt seen it coming He simply presented me with a done deedhow love had turned into bitter disappointment without so much as a word.
My name is Evelyn. I am twenty-seven, a confident woman, fair of face, with steady employment and a reliable income. My dreams were simple: to marry, bear two children, and one day drive a car bought with my own hard-earned wages. I sought no great fortune, only love and quiet contentment.
A year ago, I met William. He seemed mature, dependable, with a calm manner and a gentle smile. I fell in love as one does but once in a lifetime. We began courting, and soon enough, he asked me to move into his flat in Manchester. I did not hesitate.
But my parents were adamantly opposed.
“Hes been married before, Evelyn! If he couldnt keep his family together, the fault lies with him,” my mother said, her eyes full of worry.
My father, too, made no secret of his disapproval. But I believed everyone deserved a second chance. And so I left. I packed my bags, my clothes, my books, and what little comfort I could carry. At the time, I did not know that stepping across the threshold of his home would also mean crossing a line of trust.
In the kitchen sat a boy of about seven.
“This is my son, Oliver. Hell be living with us,” William said casually, as though speaking of a stray kitten rather than a child I was wholly unprepared to mother from the very first day.
I was speechless.
“Why didnt you tell me before?”
“What difference would it have made?” He shrugged. “His mother has gone off to live with her new husband in Bristol, and a child is an inconvenience to her now. Well manage better togetheryoure a grown woman”
I tried to convince myself I could do it. Ive always liked children. I thought we might grow close, form a bond. But everything went wrong.
Oliver proved ill-tempered, spoiled, and ill-mannered. He insulted me, threw fits, shrieked that I “couldnt cook” and that I “smelled bad.” The moment William drew near me, the boy grew jealous and demanded his fathers attention noisily.
I was exhausted. After work, I scrubbed floors, did the washing, cooked meals, and on top of it all, tended to a child who openly despised me. I tried my besthelped him with his sums, played games, read to him. He would turn his back or call for his father. To him, only William existed.
When I complained to William, he dismissed it.
“Youll get used to ityoure an adult. Be firmer. If you cant bear it, ignore him. Hes just a boy, what do you expect?”
I clenched my teeth. But every evening, my resolve weakened. I dreaded going home. I no longer felt loved.
One day, I didnt return. I went to my grandmothers in York. I turned off my telephone and vanished for a full day and night. When I rang William the next morning, his voice was icy. I tried to explain.
“William, we must talk. You never told me it would be the three of us. I wasnt ready for this. I cant get along with Oliver, and you wont stand by me”
“Stand by you? Youre a grown woman! If you cant handle a child, thats your failing. You failed the test.”
“What test?” I asked, bewildered.
“The test of endurance! You ran away. That proves youre not the one for me. You loved my flat and my wages, not me. Youre selfish!”
“Selfish?! Its your ex-wife whos selfish, abandoning her own son! And youyou never even warned me! I wasnt ready to be a mother!”
“Go, then,” he said flatly. “Take your things and leave.”
I gathered my belongings in silence. Tears choked me, but I held firm. I walked out of his flat, leaving behind what, only yesterday, had seemed the start of a new life.
And do you know what? I regret none of it. I learned that I need prove my worth to no oneleast of all to a man who made love into an ordeal.
I still believe in family. But I know this now: Ill never let anyone reshape my life in secret. A man with a child is no sentence. But a man who hides the truth is no man for me.
