It all began on a Wednesday evening, when Dad messaged in our family WhatsApp group saying we all had to meet up on Sundayno excuses. He said it was urgent. That it was something important and every single one of us had to be there.
I instantly feared the worst. So did my brother and sister. We called each other, our minds spinning with dread: illness, a diagnosis, something terrible must have happened.
Dad never calls such family meetings. Never. Even my aunt travelled down from Manchester because she thought it was going to be some sort of goodbye, or something equally grave.
We all arrived, shaky and tight-chested, hands clammy from nerves.
He was seated in the lounge looking serious, not saying a word. Mumwhos separated from him now, but still turned up anywaylooked anxious.
He opened with phrases like:
These are hard times
Life is changing
Sometimes youve got to make bold decisions
He spoke slowly, as if he was about to deliver news that would shatter us. My throat tightened. All of us steeled ourselves for catastrophe.
Then he said:
I need some financial support for a little while.
We just froze. But then he went on:
Its to start a project with my partner.
I assumed he meant a business partner. Most of us did. But then he made it perfectly clear, with not a hint of embarrassment:
My girlfriend.
A girl hed met just six months before. Practically my age.
I went numb. My sister swallowed hard. Mum looked like shed turned to stone.
All fear of illness and disaster just vanished, replaced by sheer outrage.
He continued: the girl apparently had dreams, and he wanted to help her achieve them. They needed money to open a small café, and as hed always been there for us, he now expected us to be there for him.
I was furious. Furious. Because hed never been there for us the way he claimed. Never paid proper child support. Never came to a school function. Never even called to check if we had enough for dinner.
But nownowhe expected us to bankroll his shiny new life to impress someone my age.
My brother said if he wanted to keep a young woman happy, he should work harder for it. That it wasnt our job to fund his midlife fantasies. Dad got offended, said it wasnt indulgence, but love.
My sister nearly laughed out loud. I stayed quiet, because I knew if I spoke, Id say things I couldnt unsay.
Dad insisted he wanted a family loan, but he could sign nothinghe didnt want to break the trust.
In the end, nobody agreed.
He leapt up, angry, said we were ungrateful, that we didnt know how to support family, and that families fall apart because of things like this. Mum just said, in her usual quiet way:
Families fall apart when someone stops doing their part.
He stormed out, slamming the door behind him.
Later, his girlfriend even messaged me on WhatsApp:
I never knew what love was until I met him.
Imagine. I didnt even reply.
Since that day, he hasnt spoken to any of us. Hes blocked my brother and sister. He sent me a separate message saying he expected better from me.
I still dont know if what we did was right or wrong. All I do know is this:
If he wants to dazzle his young girlfriend
let him do it with his own money, not ours.
