**Diary Entry**
I’m 62, living in Manchester, and recently faced a situation that broke my heart. My daughter, Emily, and her husband, James, decided I should dedicate my life to looking after their little girl, my granddaughter Lily. I’ve always tried to be a good grandmother, but now my patience has run out. I refused to be their unpaid babysitter, and it caused an uproar. I’m not a nanny or a maid—I have a right to my own life too!
When Emily had Lily, I jumped in to help however I could. I stayed with the baby, took her for walks, fed her, washed her clothes—anything to give my daughter some rest. I know how hard it is to be a new mum, and I wanted to support my family. But over time, my help became expected, as though it were my duty. Emily and James started acting as if I were their personal childcare service. They signed up for gym memberships, went to evening classes, met friends—and just dropped Lily off with me, saying, “Look after her, we’re busy.” Never once did they consider *my* plans. I’m retired, and damn it, I’ve earned the right to rest and enjoy myself!
Emily would call me midday, demanding I pick Lily up from nursery because she had a work party, while James was off fishing. I’d fume, but I’d still go—I couldn’t leave the poor girl alone! I adore Lily, but this situation began suffocating me. I felt used, as though my time and needs meant nothing.
Today was the final straw. Emily rang, cheerfully announcing that she and James were jetting off to Spain for two weeks. At first, I was thrilled, imagining Lily enjoying the beach. Then came the kicker—they’d decided to leave her with me without even *asking*! They just assumed I’d drop everything. I saw red. I told Emily bluntly: I won’t be their on-call nanny. They chose to have a child; they need to plan accordingly. Want a holiday? Take Lily or figure it out!
When I asked why they hadn’t consulted me, her reply gutted me: “You’re retired—it’s not like you’ve got anything better to do.” It felt like a slap. I snapped back that I *do* have plans—a long-booked trip to a lakeside retreat with my friend Margaret. They can either bring Lily *or* sort themselves out, but I won’t be treated like staff.
We ended up shouting. Emily called me a terrible grandmother, and I choked back tears. After all I’ve done, she still doesn’t see how much her words wound me. I love Lily, but I won’t surrender my entire life to their convenience. I’m not a servant—I’m a woman who deserves happiness too. Now I’m torn: stand my ground or cave to keep the peace. But one thing’s certain—this can’t go on.
