I was eight years old when my mum left home. She walked to the corner, got into a black cab, and never came back. My brother was just five.
From that day, everything at home changed. My dad started doing things hed never done before: hed wake up early to make our breakfast, learnt how to do the laundry, iron our school uniforms, and awkwardly brush our hair before school. I watched him get the portions wrong, burn the meals, forget to separate the whites from the coloured clothes. Still, he never let us go without anything. Hed come home tired from work, sit down to check our homework, sign our reading records, and make our packed lunches for the next day.
Mum never came to visit us again. My dad never brought another woman into our home. He never introduced anyone as his partner. We knew hed go out sometimes, come home late at times, but his personal life always stayed outside our front door. At home, it was just me and my brother. I never heard him say hed fallen in love again. His routine was work, come home, cook, clean, go to bed, and repeat.
On weekends, hed take us out to the park, down by the Thames, or to the shopping centreeven if it was just to look at the window displays. He taught himself how to plait our hair, sew on buttons, make our lunches. If we needed costumes for school plays, hed craft them out of cardboard and old fabric. He never complained. Not once did he say, Thats not my job.
A year ago, my dad passed away. It happened quickly; there was no time for long goodbyes. As we sorted through his things, I found old notebooks where hed tracked household spending, written down important dates, and jotted reminders like pay school fee, buy new shoes, or take girl to the GP. There were no love letters, no photos with another woman, no traces of a romantic life. Just a record of a man who lived for his children.
Ever since, one question wont leave me: was he ever truly happy? My mum left to chase her own happiness. Dad stayed and, it seemed, gave up his own. He never created another family. He never had a home with a partner. For years, he was only somebodys priority for me and my brother.
Now, I realise how extraordinary my father was. At the same time, I know he was a man who stayed alone so his children wouldnt have to be. That weighs on me. Because now that hes gone, I dont know if he ever got the love he truly deserved.












