I Don’t Visit Anyone, I Don’t Invite Anyone, I Don’t Share My Harvest or My Tools – They Think I’m Mad in My Village.

Author Mitsuko NagasakiReading 3 minViews 1

I keep to myself, I dont invite anyone over, and I dont share my crops or my toolsaround the village they think Im a bit crazy.

So Ive slipped into early retirement. Im fed up with the hustle of London and I want a quiet life, just me and the countryside, growing veg, fruit and berries and sipping herbal tea sweetened with local honey. Thats why, before I stopped working, I bought a cottage in the Cotswolds.

In spring I plant beds of flowers, set out garden gnomes, little squirrel statues and tiny lanterns. My neighbours keep stealing glances at the work. One sunny morning a neighbour named Mrs. Poppy cant hold back any longer; while Im planting seedlings she waddles over to my garden.

She complains that she forgot to sow petunias and hints that I should share my seedlings with her. Why would I give away seedlings to a woman I barely know? Petunias are finicky, I have only ten, and they need careful attention. I pretend not to grasp what shes asking.

A week and a half later I spot another neighbour, Mrs. Hattie, chatting over the fence with a lady who keeps looking my way. I get the feeling theyre talking about me.

On a summer afternoon Im trimming roses when a voice startles me. A woman stands at the fence and calls out. She says she was wandering past my house and saw ripe apples on the tree. She hasnt had any fruit of her own yet. My eyes widen. How can she barge onto my property and ask for fruit? I barely eat the apples myself; I keep them for my daughter.

Later Im in the local shop buying some sweets. A woman from the next lane steps into the queue and asks who the sweets are for, whether Id like to bring them home for tea. How does she care why Im buying treats? Why should I invite a strangerwho isnt a friend, a relative, or a colleagueinto my home?

Just last week Mrs. Poppy watches me digging with a small trowel and asks where, when and what I bought. It makes me feel I have to answer politely, even though its intrusive.

In the city I never dealt with this. No one pesters you with nosy, pointless questions, asks you to visit, or wants to share your harvest or garden tools. Yet a neighbour confided that many villagers think Im odd. So it is.

Their opinions dont matter. I bought this cottage to enjoy my privacy, not to befriend every village lady or get drawn into gossip. If thats what they think, let them stay away from my garden and my peace.

For about a year, my son had been living with Kate, yet we’d never met her parents—which seemed odd to me, so I decided to look into it I’ve always tried to raise my son to respect women above all—the women in his life: his grandmother, his mother, his wife, his daughter. In my opinion, there’s no finer quality in a man than respect for women. My husband and I made sure our son had an excellent upbringing and education, equipping him with everything he’d need for a smooth journey through life. We never wanted to help him out too much, but even so, we bought him a two-bedroom flat. Although he had a job and supported himself, he couldn’t quite afford a home of his own. We didn’t give him the flat right away—in fact, we didn’t even tell him we’d bought it. And why? Our son was living with his girlfriend, after all. For about a year, our son had been sharing his life with Kate, but we’d never met her parents, and I found that strange. Later, I discovered that Kate’s mother used to be a neighbour of one of my friends. She told me something that left me with a bad feeling. It turns out Kate’s mother threw her husband out when his income dropped—but the real drama was only just beginning… The mother then started seeing a married, but wealthy man. Kate’s grandmother, like her daughter, also had a relationship with a married man, and even forced both her daughter and granddaughter to go work on his country estate. Because of all this, my son had already had multiple run-ins with his future mother-in-law. But what unsettled me most about this story is that both the mother and grandmother were driving a wedge between Kate and her father. It’s clear the girl loves her dad, but because of these two women, her relationship with him is at risk. And to top it all off, Kate has decided to drop out of her studies. She believes a man should provide for the family. I see her point—I’ve raised my son to do just that—but heaven forbid they ever face hardship. Who’s to say what will happen if life throws them a curveball? How will she support her husband in tough times? By the way, I transferred the flat back into my name, since I know I’ve raised a gentle soul, as the saying goes. And yes, everything acquired before marriage isn’t split in a divorce—but I have a feeling Kate is clever enough to leave my ‘gentleman’ with nothing but his socks.

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— Needless to Say, This Is All My Fault! — My Boyfriend’s Sister Sobs, “I Couldn’t Have Imagined Something Like This Would Happen!” Now I Don’t Know What to Do, or How I’ll Manage Without Completely Losing Face My Boyfriend’s Sister Got Married a Few Years Ago. After the Wedding, It Was Decided the Newlyweds Would Live with Her Husband’s Mother. His Parents Have a Spacious Three-Bedroom Flat and Only One Son. “You Can Have Two Rooms, I’ll Keep One!” Promised the Mother-in-Law. “We’re All Decent People—I’m Sure We’ll Get Along Just Fine.” “We Can Always Find Our Own Place Later!” Her Husband Said, “But I Don’t See Any Harm in Trying to Live with My Mum. If It Doesn’t Work, We Can Always Move Out…” That’s Exactly What Happened. As It Turned Out, Living Together Wasn’t So Easy. Both Daughter-in-Law and Mother-in-Law Tried, but Things Got Worse Each Day. Tensions Boiled Over Now and Then, and the Arguments Grew More Frequent. “You Said If It Didn’t Work, We’d Move Out!” His Wife Cried to Him. “Well, Haven’t We Managed So Far?” His Mum Responded Dismissively. “These Are Just Trivialities—Hardly Reason to Pack Your Bags.” Exactly a Year After the Wedding, She Became Pregnant and Delivered a Healthy Baby Boy. The Baby’s Birth Coincided with Her Mother-in-Law Taking Early Retirement and Struggling to Find a New Job—No One Wants to Hire an Older Woman. So Daughter-in-Law and Mother-in-Law Stared at Each Other All Day, with Nowhere Else to Go. The Home Atmosphere Soured Quickly. The Husband Just Shrugged and Listened to the Complaints—He Was the Only Breadwinner. “We Can’t Move Out Yet—My Mum Can’t Support Herself. I Can’t Leave Her, and I Can’t Afford Both Rent and Helping Mum. Once She Finds Something, We’ll Move!” But His Wife’s Patience Was Exhausted. She Packed for Herself and the Baby and Moved Back to Her Own Mum’s. Before Leaving, She Told Her Husband She’d Never Set Foot in His Mother’s House Again. If He Cared About His Family, He’d Figure Something Out. She Expected That, Because He Loved His Family, He’d Try Straight Away to Win Her Back. But She Was Very Much Mistaken. It’s Been Over Three Months Since She Moved Out, and He Hasn’t Even Tried to Bring Her Back. Instead, He’s Living Comfortably with His Mum, Video Calling Wife and Child After Work, and Visiting on the Weekends at His Mother-in-Law’s. He’s Enjoying the Care of Two Women at Once, and—other than the occasional weekend—doesn’t even have to look after his son. His Life’s a Win! And the Mother-in-Law, frankly, hasn’t lost a thing! Meanwhile, the Young Woman Feels Miserable. She Loves Her Husband, Even Knowing He’s Doing Wrong. “What Did You Expect When You Left?” The Husband Shrugs, “You Can Come Back Whenever You Want.” It’s Obvious the Wife Has No Intention—or Ability—to Move into a Flat Alone, Especially as a New Mum on Maternity Leave. Is This Really the End of Their Family? What Do You Think—Does She Have Even the Slightest Chance of Returning to Her Mother-in-Law’s Home Without Completely Losing Face?