I married a man who has a daughter. My husband’s ex-wife went to live in another country and left her daughter with her father. She does not communicate with her daughter at all. She has a new family there and her own children. Sometimes she sends her daughter some trinkets for the holidays. But the girl is not happy with them at all. She needs her mother, not trinkets. She is angry at her mother for not calling her to her. When my husband and I first started our communication, his daughter lived with her grandmother, my mother-in-law. Then she said that she had difficulties with the child, she was already many years old and sent the girl to us. At first, when I found out that my husband had a daughter, I hoped that our relationship would improve. But no matter how hard I tried, we can not communicate. I tried all methods, but it did not work. The girl understands that I am not her mother, so she does not obey me.
She ignores me as if I do not exist. She tries to command, wants to rule.
She invents excuses to complain to her grandmother and father. And then I have to listen to lectures about how I am wrong and that I need to find an approach to her myself and show patience. The fact is that I cannot understand why I have to put up with her rudeness and antics. If I have to take care of her and bring her up as my husband and mother-in-law want, then if necessary I can scold her and punish her. But no. Neither my husband nor my mother-in-law intend to scold her or deny her anything. And I have to endure her rudeness and rudeness. As a result, she grows up to be a spoiled and capricious child. My husband, of course, tries to defend his daughter, but he does not cut me down, yell at me or try to take revenge.
He works all day, and it turns out that I mostly stay with the girl. She is already an adult, she is 12, but her husband and mother-in-law do not want her to stay home alone. Then let them sit with her themselves. I want to rest, to work. My mother-in-law comes for an hour, two, talks to her, reproaches me for not treating her as kindly as she would like. Perhaps, if she and her husband had not pressured me, our contact with the girl would have taken place. And now I already have thoughts that I should not marry a man with a trailer. I am shocked by her character, laziness and carelessness. I will never be a mother to her. And now I’m pregnant and there is no turning back. I need to find a way to make her voluntarily want to move to her grandmother. It’s the only way out.
