I want to divorce my wife because I can no longer bear being around her. For the past few years, these thoughts have not left my mind for a single day. We have been married for 20 years; we got married when we were still young.
We loved each other, but our feelings have long since faded. Now we live together only because of our child, even though he is already an adult. However, I feel that he will not understand our decision to separate.
At first, my wife did not want to have children. She thought my income was too low. On television, they constantly show programs where women blame their husbands for their small earnings. For a long time, I did not realize that the same thing was happening in our family. But then it suddenly hit me. A revelation!
Recently, new families have moved into our street. In the past, we only saw alcoholics around us, which made our family look ideal in comparison. After all, there was not much to compare with!
We hardly have any friends or relatives. Now we have new neighbors who sometimes visit us in a friendly way. We have started socializing as families. I have noticed something in their homes.
Spouses never speak badly about each other, at least not in public. But my wife constantly criticizes me in front of everyone. She even raises her voice. Of course, this means a lot, and I feel uncomfortable. I had never noticed anything like this in 20 years. It is one thing to argue at home, but in front of others…
Strangers witness her shouting. Where is this acceptable? Or maybe I am exaggerating everything? My wife tells everyone that I am a failure and that she has to support the family on her own.
She claims that I have achieved nothing all these years, that I could not even provide our son with a proper education. She says she paid for the renovation of our apartment. If you believe her, she is the only one who has done anything for our family.
As if I had not contributed anything. Maybe I never paid attention to this before, since we did not interact much with other people.
My salary is around 5,000 per month, and I give all the money to my wife, keeping nothing for myself. She manages our finances. We bought the house with my money, and I paid off the loan for five years.
Despite this, we constantly argue. About money. My wife earns only 800 euros. And I have never asked where she spends it. I feel like even her voice has changed—it has become irritating, not like before.
I do not enjoy talking to her; I do not want to touch her. If anything happens, she blames me and gets angry. Everything I do is wrong, I am always mistaken. And she is just perfect and flawless. This is how we live.
We used to be closer and warmer toward each other, but now everything has changed… She irritates me. I cannot change that in any way. And she does not try to smooth things over; she constantly argues with me. How can I not get nervous?
Every other woman I know behaves differently. They speak more politely; they are friendly, kind, and well-mannered—nothing like my wife. Why is she like this? Has she lost all affection for me? I feel like I am living someone else’s life, not my own. And that frustrates me.
So far, I have not dared to take any concrete actions. I feel that deep inside, I still love her, even though she makes me angry and sometimes drives me crazy. But I no longer want to live in constant stress—I have no strength left to endure her bitterness.
