How my mother-in-law lost her home
I can say with absolute certainty that we have no obligation to support my brother-in-law and his family or pay to house them. Let me be clear from the start: Im the owner of the three-bedroom flat we live ina place I bought in a truly dismal state, even before I married. Just picture it: on the first day, the front door wasnt even in its hinges, just leaning against the frame. The place was falling apart, and yet I was thrilled with the price. The renovations I tackled bit by bit. But thats not what this is about.
By the time I met my husband, Id already restored two of the bedrooms, even managed to buy a few pieces of furniture. The flat had become quite cosy, really, compared to how it started.
My husbandtall, handsomewas renting a place when we first met. A few months after our paths crossed, he moved in with me. After we married, we turned one room into a nursery, and I gave birth to a son, then a daughter.
Life was idyllic, truly, until one brisk, autumn evening when my mother-in-law shattered the peace. She arrived on our doorstep, arms loaded with suitcases, her eyes red from weeping.
Could I possibly stay here for a while? she sobbed. My sons brought some girl to live at my flat. I do hope it works out between themmaybe shell be the one, and theyll grow old together, you know I shant stay for long, Ill help you, pick the children up from nursery and school, cook their meals. Ive no one else!
She was in bits, so of course we let her in and gave her the biggest bedroom. Shed retired years earlier and, true to her word, took care of the children. She never went back to her own place; her youngest son had taken over her flat, living there with his new wife and two childrenone theirs and one she had before they met.
Years back, my husbands brother married right out of sixth form to his school sweetheart. My in-laws sold their house and used the money to buy themselves a one-bedroom flat and a two-bedroom for their son. Not long after, my father-in-law fell ill and passed away.
My brother-in-law and his now ex-wife had two children, but after their divorce, he left the flat to her and their children. Now his former wife lives there with a new husband and three children.
After the divorce, he moved back with his mother, saying, Mum, Ill stay with you for a bit. Im single now, dreaming of a new startsomething better will come along. Ill sort it, promise. Of course, nothing of the sort happened. Several months later, he brought another girl to live with his mother.
From then on, my mother-in-law would bring round all his childrenthose from the first marriage and the secondevery weekend. Our house descended into near madness.
A year later, we told her she had to find a solution for her living arrangement. Again, the tears, the breakdowns.
I had no choice but to confront my brother-in-law and told him he needed to move out of their mothers flat. He refused outright, saying he had children and barely scraped by each month, so couldnt afford a rental. What was I meant to do?
My relationship with my mother-in-laws worsened so much lately I dread coming home after work. I decided I must talk to my husband. I told him he had to find another flat for his mother, or Id begin divorce proceedings.
He was stunned; he honestly had no idea where his mother could go. I cant just toss her out on the street, he protested.
I suggested she could rent a small studiowe could afford the expense. But my mother-in-law flatly refused to live anywhere rented, insisting instead that we pay for a two-bedroom flat for my brother-in-law and his family so she could move back home.
I called that out as sheer cheek. I told her, if she didnt move out within a week, Id put her things outside the front door. What choice did I have left?
I dont see why I should have to support my brother-in-laws family, let alone provide them with a roof over their heads!
