Holiday Ruined by My Future Mother-in-Law
7th July
Taking a trip alone with my daughter would be daunting, you must understand two women, strangers in a foreign place, not a word of the language, goodness knows what could happen My soon-to-be mother-in-law, Mrs. Martha Hathaway, waved a dismissive hand. But if you two are there, it wont feel nearly as alarming, will it? Well stick together if something goes wrong.
Little did I know, just how close was she intending us to be on this holiday.
I really was rather gutted.
Six months ago, Charlotte and I, together with my brother Henry and his wife Amelia, started planning our summer holiday. Henry and Amelia were our perfect travelling companions we all seemed to share the same idea of a good time, the same sense of fun, and the same values. Whether it was a local pub, a week in Cornwall, or traipsing about the Lake District, we were in sync. Last years two trips had only confirmed how much we enjoyed each others company.
And yet, here we are.
It never even crossed my mind to blame Amelia for falling ill the week before our flight. Why would it? But surely Im allowed to feel disappointed, arent I?
Well, what can you do, Henry groaned. Looks like you two will need to go wandering round old ruins by yourselves.
He was miserable about losing out on the holiday too, but no way was he going to abandon a wife whod come down with glandular fever. That would be a bit off, and nobody expected it of him.
A shame about the money, though the travel firm would never give back all the costs at this late stage. And plans, once spoiled, sting a bit, dont they?
That very evening, Mrs. Hathaway, Henry and my mother, turned up at our house bearing her wonderful idea.
Her popping round was a regular thing; my brother and I both remained quite close to Mum, and besides, Martha Hathaway was, on the whole, lovely. Of course, she did have some of those classic mother-in-law quirks trying to instruct Charlotte on running a household, pass on her helpful tips. Still, my friends all say their mothers-in-law are far worse than mine. Ive probably got off lightly.
True, she comes over for tea about four times a week. But only occasionally does she find herself overcome with the urge to give my fiancée a masterclass in folding sheets.
Some of her advice was actually useful. So, I hardly saw her as a nuisance.
Thus, when she suggested coming along on holiday, I didnt think anything of it.
Mum wanted to take my youngest sister, Emily, along. Shed buy Henrys tickets off him and Amelia, and head to sunny Greece with Charlotte, me and Emily for some relaxation and a spot of new adventures.
Two women travelling alone is worrying, she repeated. But with you and Charlotte beside us, its not so nerve-wracking. If anything happens, well be there for each other.
I really hadnt even begun to imagine exactly how close that arrangement would become.
Had I known, Id never have agreed to my future mother-in-law and sister along for the ride.
Still another way to look at it, perhaps it was just as well to discover the true nature of my future in-laws and wife while there were still no shared mortgages, no joint bank accounts, before things got even messier.
You could say, it was a lucky escape.
Naturally, when I told my mates Id agreed to take my future mother-in-law and sister-in-law on holiday, they thought Id lost my marbles.
Who in their right mind goes on holiday with their mother-in-law? Shell make your life hell, they warned. Shell boss you about, make your wife and you dance attendance, and on top of that, shell expect you to keep Emily occupied.
I argued in Charlottes defence Emily was a nineteen-year-old grown up, and hardly needed us to keep her entertained. She and Charlotte barely exchanged two words outside family dinners where all Emily ever did was nod hello, ask for the salt, and say goodbye.
No way would she want to chat all holiday long.
As for Mrs. Hathaway, yes, wed have to account for her pace and preferences in the trip’s planning. But surely it wouldnt mean that much compromise.
And even if things did go a bit pear-shaped, it was only for two weeks. Afterwards, if Charlotte felt traumatised, shed have every excuse never to repeat it, citing whatever reason she liked. After all, its bad manners to refuse a thing before trying it at least once, as Mum always said.
Moreover, my friends dont know Mrs. Hathaway at all merely tarring her with the same brush as their own overbearing mothers-in-law. Theyve actually said Im lucky mines so easy-going. And now suddenly theyre all warning me off the trip.
But refusing wasnt an option now that Mum was looking forward to it, and Charlotte was thrilled to be taking her mum to Greece.
The warning signs began on the plane.
Emily slotted herself by the window without argument fair enough, I suppose. Charlottes used to business flights for work and couldnt care less about the view. I prefer the aisle seat for obvious reasons quick escape to the loo without clambering over snoozing strangers.
Mum arranged herself across the aisle, looking jittery. When the plane hit some turbulence, she barely held it together.
So, when she begged me to swap seats so she could sit by her favourite son, how could I say no? Yet, strangely, when the bumpy bit was over, no one offered to move back. On the contrary Mum sat there pretending to be engrossed in my film, and then promptly fell asleep, head on my shoulder.
Dont throw a wobbly, I told myself. After a fright like that, anyone might need a rest.
Yet, oddly enough, she woke up the instant they started bringing round the in-flight meals. And if shed wanted to swap, she could have done so with Emily, who after five minutes had also lost all interest in the window and was watching telly, just like me. The more I watched this display of family harmony, the more left out I began to feel.
At the airport, this got worse. My mum made a beeline for me asking for help with her bag, dragging me off to find a water machine, while Charlotte barely rated a nod.
It really did start to feel like I was on a family holiday only, not my family.
Darling, what are you sulking about? Im not making you a spare part, Charlotte reassured. Mum isnt used to foreign travel, you saw how nervous she gets
I bit my tongue. Who asked your mother to come with us anyway? But another part of me remembered my own mums guidance put yourself last, be considerate to others, look after your elders. Mum had just had a rough flight she deserved a bit of care.
No real harm was done because I helped carry her cases or checked she was alright. Still, I was oblivious then, to just how much that short flight and arrival in Athens had set the tone for what was to come.
Because the very next evening, my future mother-in-law moved herself, with a sort of ceremonial flourish, right into our hotel room.
If nothing else, this trip taught me one thing: next time, family holidays are best enjoyed with just a couple at a time or, if you must, be certain all parties truly want to spend that much time in each others company!
