13th December
Todays been one of those days where the cold seems to slip into your bones, no matter how many jumpers you pile on. As Im writing, I can see my own breath in the little light of this flickering candlemakes me wish I could bottle up some sunshine for days like these.
I remember watching Mum this morning. She stood at the stove, swirling a spoon through a pan of potato stew, the kind thats mostly water with just a hint of vegetable. She glanced back at me and my two younger brothers, her eyes tired but still gentle. Eat, love. Theres enough for everyone. Its no sin to shareshutting your eyes to others, thats the real wrong in life. Thats what she always says.
Most six-year-olds probably dont think much about the worries that adults carry. But since Dad lost his regular job, and Mum started doing odd cleaning and ironing work for the neighbours when she can, I feel like I carry more on my shoulders than I should. The three of us tuck together, especially when were hungry, which is often when the firewood is running low and the nights drag on.
Walking through our tiny village in Kent, the world felt especially quiet today. Christmas is so close, you could almost think the whole country was twinklingjust not in our house. Outside, December gloom pressed at the windows, and you could smell the promise of snow in the air.
Whilst stirring the stew and willing it to stretch for just a few more spoonfuls, I caught a warm scent drifting across the fence. The Johnsons next door were celebrating early, laughter and cheerful voices echoing through the cold. The unmistakable aroma of roast pork floated over, mixed with spices I can only dream of. You could hear the sizzle, the clink of platesreminded me of a fairy tale told from somewhere out of reach.
Unable to help myself, I wandered to the fence with Billy and Charlie snugged close behind, peering through frosted slats. I didnt beg or say a word; Ive learnt from Mum that wanting isnt the same as taking, and that you should never covet what isnt yours. Still, my heart didnt know how not to yearn for just a taste.
Softly, under my breath, I wished, Oh, just a little bit, please
Out of nowhere, I heard someone call, Ellie! I jumped a little.
Mrs. Thompson, who has always reminded me of a toasty fireplace, stood by her garden shed, cheeks rosy from the cold and her hands busied with cooking. She flashed a warm smile and beckoned me over. Come here, sweet, Ive something for you and your brothers! Her generosity made my chest tight. I almost felt too embarrassed to accept, yet she gently packed up a tin with slices of hot roast and gravy, the kind of Sunday dinner Ive only seen at a distance.
Take this home, darling. Its never wrong to share. Whats wrong is to turn your head away. Her words, so simply spoken, wrapped around me like a woolen scarf.
I think thats when I cried. It wasnt hunger, not really. It was because, for the first time in ages, I felt truly seennot just as the poor kid down the lane, but as a person.
Clutching the tin to my chest, I dashed home, with Billy and Charlie squealing behind me. For a brief moment, that tiny, crumbling house was full of warm laughter and the smell of a proper Christmas mealsomething wed never known.
When Mum and Dad shuffled in from the cold that evening, worn out and wind-battered, they found us huddled round the kitchen table, beaming over the generous meal. Mums tears came quiet and thick; Dad just pulled off his flat cap and stared a long time at the ceiling, whispering thanks.
There was no Christmas tree in our corner this year, nor any shiny presents. But there was kindness, and that felt more necessary than any bauble or bow. Sometimes, all it takes to feel you belong in this world is a plate of food and a hand reached out.
There are still so many children like me who never ask for much, not even at Christmas. We dont knock or pleadwe just watch, maybe wishing for a magical bit of warmth from across the fence. Sometimes, the smallest actsa shared supper, a gentle wordbecome the biggest gifts of all.
If youre reading this, maybe itll make you pause a little. I hope it does.












