The wife was taking the dog to the vet, and a thought had begun to creep into her mind that perhaps shed made a grave mistake. Now, instead of one unlucky creature in their home, there were two.
It all became clear the moment the kitten arrived. Or rather, the moment he was discoveredfound in a rubbish bin, left there by someone who couldnt care less.
Her trip to take out the bins ended with her returning home cradling a new family member in her arms. They named him Clivefrom clumsy, a name that soon proved apt.
Clives first act upon arrival was to plunge his front paws straight into a steaming bowl of stew. While the wife scrambled to catch the yelping kitten as he darted across the dining table, he managed to dunk his back legs into a bowl of cream. And so it began.
Clive developed a knack for getting into mischief. He managed to sprain all four legs just by jumping off the bed.
Whenever he knocked cups, bowls, and vases off nightstands and tables, hed inevitably be conked on the head by the very same itemsbecause he always landed directly underneath them.
If there was salt on the table, everyone instinctively shielded it with their palms. Theyd learned that Clive would leap onto the table and land right in it every time.
Three times he received an electric shock. Normally, cats don’t come back from this, but it seemed his guardian angel was especially vigilant. The vet managed to revive him on every occasion.
He nearly drowned in a bucket of mop water several times, and each time was fished out just in time. After that, the household never left water buckets unattended.
Clives acrobatics were singular too; he always seemed to miss his mark, colliding with everything from corners to mirrors and armrests.
You get the picture.
The wife even took him to the local wise womennot that she believed in such things, but she was desperate. They would chuckle, take her pounds, and roll eggs over the poor kittens back, mumbling about curses. But after Clive managed to smash a tea set at each of their homes, rumours spread, and every witch and seer flat-out refused to see him again.
Exhausted, the wife took advice from a friend: get Clive a companion, perhaps another cat or even a dog.
This delighted the wife. For a considerable sum, to the joy of their daughter and herself, they brought home a rather odd-looking chihuahua named Rex.
Why odd? Well, if youve ever seen one up close, youll knowit sort of resembles a dog, but not quite. And its barkor cough, or whatever that sound iscertainly leaves an impression.
If you know, you know.
The very next day, everything changed. Their house was an old one, and as it often happens, mice made themselves at home in the walls.
Clive wasnt afraid of the mice. In fact, he seemed to enjoy observing them, sometimes even chasing them for fun. For obvious reasons, theyd set up a few mousetraps.
Rex, the dog-like creature, quickly got a nasty bite from oneright in the trap.
The wife, faced with a whimpering dog on the way to the vet, realised her suspicion was correct: now, instead of one hopeless creature, they had two.
Clive seemed to take the new arrival under his wing. The two would head out together into the garden, requiring constant supervision.
They always found ways to get into trouble with ants, wasps, and bees. The geese were sure to have a nip at them, while the hens would take a peck given half the chance. In short, life didnt get easier.
But one morning changed everything.
The husband parked his car in front of the house, as he always did. Mornings included a cup of coffee, locking the front gate, then climbing into his car and heading off.
So, on this particular morning, Clive knocked over the coffee, sent the toast crashing to the floor, and, instead of scurrying away, stood resolutely by the door, blocking the path.
The husband tried nudging him aside and was met with a swipe from a claw and an arched back.
You little terror! he shouted. First you spill my coffee and drop my toast, and now you scratch me! Out of the way!
He tried to move the cat with his foot, but then
Out from under the bed shot the peculiar little dog, coughing ferociously in an imitation of a bark, throwing itself between Clive and the husband.
Tiny Rex spread out his trembling legs, barred his little teeth, and in his eyes you could read, I wont let you hurt him! Youll have to get through me first!
The situation was growing ridiculous.
Are you two joking? Im late for work! the husband exclaimed.
He dashed into the bedroom where his wife was still half-asleep.
Hurry up and get up! I need to leave and those two are blocking the door!
Who? What? the wife asked, still groggy. Together, they went to see the commotion.
No sooner had they reached the door than an enormous crash sounded from outside.
Rushing through the gate, they were greeted by utter chaos: the milk lorry making early deliveries had smashed into their car at full speed, brakes failed, and reduced it to a heap of twisted metal.
The husbands fresh cup of coffee slipped from his hands The lorry driver was carried off in an ambulance, apparently suffering a heart attack. These things happen.
*****
After that, Rex and Clive would let the husband leave for work, but every morning hed pause at the door and ask the pair:
Everything clear out there, lads? All safe?
Rex would bare his little teeth and nod in stern agreement.
You might wonder if Clive and Rex became lucky after all this. Hardly!
They still manage to get into all sorts of trouble, likely more than before. Yet now, no one throws up their hands in despair or laments their ruined fortunes.
Now, they’re both fussed over, cuddled, dabbed clean of cream and stew. Rex sports an expensive, rather handsome collar, while Clive has scratching posts in every corner and even his own new bed.
Of course, Clive never actually sleeps in that new bedhe much prefers snoozing at his humans feet, from where he inevitably falls off, causing commotion in the night.
Rex comes running at every crash; he actually uses the fancy bed, and whenever Clive yowls, Rex coughs up a storm and promises to defend his beloved friend to the end.
Within half an hour, the whole household settles back to sleep, with Rex and Clive nestled between husband and wifejust enough room for everyone till morning.
And if you dont see the point of all this, feel free to move on.
But truly, it’s all about love. Believe me, Clive and Rex arent cherished for their luck or lack thereof, but simply because they exist. And that, as it turns out, is the greatest luck of all.
