The end! For 16 years, he belittled me, and I endured…
In spring, everything changed…
I never imagined anything could shake the mundanity I lived in for those long 16 years.
Hope had long slipped away from me.
When I was 22, I got married, believing I’d found the one, the only person with whom I’d spend my life. Emily meant everything to me. She drew me in, captivating me with some kind of magical allure. I was so enchanted by her that even her peculiar habits seemed endearing.
Like, for instance, her habit of flinging open the windows in the middle of winter and yanking the covers off me to wake me at dawn.
Or her favorite “joke” – making me spin around in front of our friends as if I were a model being inspected for purchase.
She made decisions for me.
She decided where I should work.
Where we’d go on holiday.
Which of my friends I could talk to and who needed to be cut out of my life.
And I allowed it.
I thought that was how it was supposed to be—that this was love.
I was blind.
I believed that having a child would change everything…
When our marriage started to crumble, I truly thought a child would save us.
I was wrong.
Emily left me to deal with it alone.
She didn’t care about my fears, my worries, or the fact that doctors were not hopeful for us.
She accepted calmly that she had children from her first marriage, and if we couldn’t have any together, so be it.
But for me, it was agony.
For her, it was another chance to belittle me.
She made me feel at fault for everything.
“You can’t give me a child!”
“You can’t even cook! Your food’s going to give me an ulcer!”
“You’re not a real man if you can’t handle something so trivial!”
I felt worthless.
I tried fighting. Sought out doctors, went through tests, and followed treatments.
But it was all for nothing.
She broke me down, and I bore it.
Over time, I gave up.
I withdrew into myself, stopped socializing, and closed off from everyone.
I became a mere shadow of who I once was.
I no longer recognized that confident guy who once dreamed of a family, happiness, and children.
I looked in the mirror and saw a pitiful person too frightened to speak up.
When I tried to argue that I didn’t deserve constant humiliation, that I wanted respect, Emily just laughed in my face.
“You? Who do you think you are? You’re pathetic! You’re worse than any homeless man on the street!”
She knew I had nowhere else to go.
She convinced everyone around me that I was useless, weak, and worthless.
And I started to believe it myself.
She told me that without her, I’d be lost; I wouldn’t survive on my own.
And I stayed.
But come March, everything turned upside down…
I had just one friend left—Sarah.
She had moved to work in Italy but came back in spring because her husband was gravely ill.
Then he passed away.
Sarah was alone in her house. Her sons had long lived abroad.
I began visiting her after work, sometimes staying overnight.
At first, Emily didn’t like it, then she started causing scenes, and finally resorted to threats.
“You’re not going there!”
“I’ll drag you out by your hair!”
“I’ll lock you inside!”
“I’ll file for divorce!”
One evening, Sarah looked at me and said:
“I hope she does file for divorce!”
We looked at each other, and suddenly I realized: here was my chance.
Sarah offered to let me stay at her place when she returned to Italy.
If I didn’t have to pay rent, I could live on my salary.
I agreed.
I left. I chose myself.
Since then, I’ve lived in her apartment.
In the morning, I get up, go to the window, look at the old house where I once lived with Emily, and quietly say:
“Good morning, Stephen!”
I look at my life and realize: I am free.
I am no longer afraid.
I’ve learned to smile again.
I’ve learned to live again.
I glance towards Emily’s house and silently say to her:
“There’s always a way out, dear!”
I put on a clean shirt, leave the house, and walk down the street with my head held high.
Now, nothing can break me.
