While mums fill parenting forums with questions about what to pack in a first aid kit and whether theyll be allowed to take the pushchair into the cabin, other holidaymakers are bracing themselves for the ordeal of flying alongside them. Its become a running theme lately. At first, anyone trying to shame frustrated passengers was told that children must be loved and accepted, but now it seems airlines are being urged to create almost separate zones to keep families and everyone else apart. When did things get like this?
Wishing you a pleasant flight!
When exactly did it become fashionable to refuse to pause your life after having a child? People go to work, maintain a bustling social life, attend events, and continue travelling as much as they please, regardless of the child’s age. Our own mothers hardly lived such extravagant lives and it simply wouldnt have crossed their minds. I can barely imagine a mother bringing her baby into a restaurant in the 1960sor even later. Back then, people might have considered it a blessing, and in a way, I think it made sense.
No matter how anyone tries to skirt around it, travelling long distances with children is exhausting for the child and parents alike. If you want everyones journey to be bearable, you have to put some effort in. Its what many people simply arent prepared to do. As soon as the holiday begins, the relaxation startsand the children are left to fend for themselves. Everyone else just has to put up with it.
Everyone likes to fly in comfort. Who wants to spend even a two-hour flight in a cacophony of noise and chaos after paying such a high price for a ticket? Passengers regularly complain about legroomnever mind how insignificant that feels when theres a five-year-old behind you raring to see just how far your seat will swing back and forth. From what Ive observed, no one smiles and turns around to engage the child in a silly game.
Nursery: A Vanishing Breed
Once, I tried to be polite. When a woman with a baby who couldnt have been older than a year settled herself next to me on a flight, I felt my heart sink. It soon became clear that wasnt the half of it. Her family turned out to be a small crowd of children, comfortably spread out in front, behind, and on either side of me, passing bottles and dummies across the seats, conversations bouncing in all directions. At one point, I half expected them to adopt me. To be honest, it was deeply unpleasant. I was asked to hold all sorts without a single please, and nearly scalded with boiling water from a thermos more than once. Wonderful! There was nowhere to retreat, short of climbing out the window.
Another time, on the train, I witnessed a different scene. The mother of a four-year-old girl entertained her daughter non-stop for the entire twenty-six hours we rattled along the tracks. The woman was clearly trying not to let her little one disturb the rest of us. But what did we get? It was Darling, lets go here!, Darling, lets try over there!, Shall we look out the window?, Lets do some drawings!and then forty minutes of loud crayon-picking and debates about the best sort of puppy or kitten to sketch. Hard to say which is worse.
Its little wonder people can be driven to suggest families stay home until the kids are older. Sure, if your child is so serene that theyll sit quietly colouring for three hours before nodding off among the crayons, thats fine. But are there really any children like that?
And of course, there are the babies, wailing at take-off, landing, and just about any patch in between. Where it used to be just one infant per flight, now you find three or five, plus their excitable siblings leaping and squealing in the aisle. You leave a cabin like that as swiftly as the plane itself.
Let me make it clear: Im not against children. Ive stayed in the trenches and travelled with a toddler myselfgrudgingly, if Im honest. I just dont have the patience to care for a young child on holiday. I only started taking my son once he reached the age where you can count with your fingers and strictly instruct, Sit here, dont touch a thing. Its tedious, sure, but at least youre not spending hours orchestrating colouring sessions. Yet some people disagree; they pack entire suitcases of developmental activities to keep their youngsters entertained, running up and down because its important for a growing body. And thats all there is to it.
Reflecting on these experiences, Ive realised: you cant expect everyone to accommodate your family, especially when travelling. If you want peace for yourself and others, the effort needs to start from you. Consider others, prepare your children, and remember that everyone deserves a bit of comfortespecially at thirty thousand feet in the air.
