Do not judge me harshly for my confession. Perhaps I am a bad mother if I have raised a son who no longer wants to communicate with me. However, I still want to hear good advice from those who face the same problems with their adult children.

Do not judge me harshly for my confession. Perhaps I am a bad mother if I have raised a son who no longer wants to communicate with me. However, I still want to hear good advice from those who face the same problems with their adult children.

I am 61 years old, and my only son is 30. I got married for the second time, so my husband is my son’s stepfather. My son has been married for seven years, and his daughter will soon turn one. We live nearby, in neighboring houses.

Communication practically stopped more than a year ago. I feel that my son is very offended by me for something, but I do not know what, and all my attempts to figure it out (including through my daughter-in-law) have led nowhere.

My son grew up very sickly and had many other problems, but our relationship was always close. I practically raised him alone because his stepfather is a kind and gentle man who hardly interfered in his upbringing after once hearing, “You are not my father.”

I had to be both a mother and a father—what else could I do? There were also bad friends and the danger of drugs. I am not saying that I am a perfect mother, but I tried my best.

Our relationship worsened sharply when I asked him to help me with my computer. I should say that it was not the first time I had asked, and he felt that it was happening too often. He said nothing, just stood up and left with his wife, without taking the pastries I had baked.

Since then, he has not communicated with me. When he goes abroad, he does not inform me. We communicate with our granddaughter only through my daughter-in-law, who responds to all questions with, “You need to sort it out with him yourself.”

I try not to take offense, I pray, I call, I write to him, but there is no answer. I do not know what to do. I tried to leave my son alone completely, but it only led to even greater estrangement. How can I reach his heart?

I myself was, it seems, a good daughter—I took care of my mother until her death and loved her very much, and my son helped me with that.

I would be very grateful for advice.