Cooking for Everyone
“I’m not planning a grand celebration for my milestone birthday, so I’m only inviting a handful of guests,” Nina told her son and daughter-in-law at dinner.
“How many is that?” wondered David, well aware of his mother’s love for extravagant parties.
“There will definitely be twenty-three guests and perhaps a couple more,” the elderly woman calmly explained.
“Wait a minute,” Olivia interjected, piecing it all together. “So you’ve already invited everyone and now you’re just letting us know?”
“Well, I’m turning seventy, it’s my flat and I feel entitled to invite whoever I please,” Nina retorted. “It’ll just be the kids, grandkids, and close relatives. I’m not inviting the neighbours or distant family.”
“Why go through all this hassle and expense?” David questioned. “We don’t have a huge flat for so many people, and now we’ll have to buy food, clean up, and organise everything.”
“It’s fine to live in my flat, but you’ve already counted everything if it’s about throwing a party for your mum,” Nina began her theatrical response. “This might be my last big birthday, so I have the right to decide on my own.”
“You do realise Mum can’t handle all the preparation by herself, right?” David later asked. “My older sister, Catherine, is not on good terms with Mum, so she might not even show up. My younger sister, Emily, lives in another city and won’t be able to help, so it’s all on you.”
“So, basically, I become the housemaid for a week,” Olivia fumed.
“We don’t have much choice, want to honour Mum, and we are living in her flat,” David reminded her.
Olivia wasn’t keen on doing anything, but their living arrangement seemed decisive. She realised that if she didn’t help, her mother-in-law would make their lives difficult. Two weeks before the party, she did a thorough clean-up of the flat, polishing everything and planned just to refresh it right before the party.
“I don’t like the menu you’ve suggested,” Nina commented, looking over her daughter-in-law’s notes. “There aren’t enough meat dishes; those trendy sandwiches are no good, and we certainly can’t have hungry guests.”
“But there are plenty of dishes, all hearty, and making everything will require a lot of money and time,” Olivia defended.
“Alright, I’ll add a few more things, then we’ll figure it out,” Nina said sceptically.
After her additions, the list of dishes and costs almost doubled. Nina planned to cover part of the expense herself but was counting on her son and daughter-in-law for the rest.
“First of all, we’re one family, and it’s normal,” she declared firmly. “Secondly, I haven’t decided about the flat yet. If I leave it to you, you’ll still come out ahead, so a little effort wouldn’t hurt.”
Olivia tried to hold back and said nothing to avoid upsetting her husband. He dutifully gave in to his mother’s whims. She didn’t want to buy all the groceries at one shop, believing it was inefficient.
“But we’ll waste petrol, time, and effort buying oil in one shop, cream at the market, and eggs out of town,” Olivia expressed her confusion.
“No big deal,” insisted her mother-in-law. “I want to be sure of the quality, so we buy where I always do.”
Nina didn’t have the energy to help with preparations, but she controlled the shopping and demanded her son drive her around. David had to accompany her after work, hearing her lectures.
“I hope you have a trusted baker for ordering the cake?” Nina asked her daughter-in-law.
“I was thinking we could just buy a ready-made cake or pastries,” Olivia was taken aback.
“Well, sure, we could forget the fuss and just eat a scone for my milestone birthday,” the pensioner theatrically sulked. “You wouldn’t pull this with your own mum.”
“My mum had a milestone last year and didn’t celebrate,” Olivia blurted out. “We just had a quiet family dinner.”
“Well, that’s your family’s business; every family is different,” Nina countered. “You joined ours, so please respect our ways.”
Olivia truly tried to please her mother-in-law. She chose a cake and browsed recipes during lunch breaks at work and dashed to the shop after work to get something extra each time. Since the guests were invited for Saturday, she took days off starting Thursday to prepare everything in time.
“I gather you have no decency,” Nina fumed again. “Well, David is a man and doesn’t understand, but you could have offered to help me.”
“What’s wrong?” Olivia asked, trying to pinpoint the dissatisfaction.
“I’m having a party, guests are coming, and I’ll be greeting them in a robe with my hair in a bun?”
Olivia ended up accompanying her mother-in-law on a shopping trip to pick out an outfit. She arranged for a friend to come over and do the birthday girl’s hair and makeup.
“Why are you baking the meat rolls today?” Nina burst into the kitchen. “The party is two days away and they won’t be fresh.”
“Because tomorrow’s packed, and I physically can’t cook everything at once,” Olivia reminded her. “The stove and oven will be busy, and I only have two hands.”
“Then get up earlier and don’t act like a hero,” Nina pushed.
“You’re trying to make me do everything,” Olivia could no longer stay silent. “And really, if you don’t like it, I won’t do any of it.”
“What do you mean?” Nina shouted, red with anger.
“Take your guests to a café or order in,” Olivia snapped. “I’ve had enough of the complaints and blame.”
David returned from work to find his wife in tears and his mother seething. His mother was taking heart drops, accusing the daughter-in-law of wanting to do her in and ruin the celebration.
“My dear, I beg you, let’s see this through,” David pleaded. “We just need to get through the next couple of days and then it’ll be fine.”
For her husband’s peace, Olivia set her pride aside, took a break, and returned to the kitchen. She spent the entire Friday there, exhausted. By Saturday, everything was ready, and the flat gleamed. The birthday girl, in a new dress and coiffure, graciously received guests and gathered everyone to the table.
“Everything’s cooked with love and in high spirits,” Nina sweetly smiled at her relatives.
“As always, it’s delicious, beautiful, and unique,” guests complimented her.
“I worked hard, despite some people trying to make things difficult,” the birthday girl replied, glancing around without focusing on anyone but including her daughters and daughter-in-law.
Throughout the celebration, Olivia barely sat, constantly bustling around with plates. David, overwhelmed, instructed his sisters to help.
“I still don’t understand if you’re a hero or just naïve?” asked Catherine in the kitchen.
“What do you mean?” Olivia was puzzled.
“Everyone can see Mum’s running circles around you, that this celebration is on your dime and with your labour,” Catherine replied.
“Don’t rub salt in the wound,” pleaded their other sister, Emily. “You know what Mum’s like and why we keep our distance.”
“It’s a milestone, respect, we live together, and all…” Olivia seemed flustered.
“She’s our mum; we only came because there’s a fear it might really be her last,” Emily continued. “But truthfully, she’s a tough person, living with her is impossible. And if you think she’ll leave you the flat, she probably won’t, just wants to keep you close and in control. We’ve been there.”
Guests lingered late, delivered flattering speeches, nearly cleaned out the table and left, taking special to-go pastries with them. After the last guest departed, the birthday girl retired like royalty, without so much as a thank you to her son and daughter-in-law. Olivia stayed washing dishes almost till dawn before she could finally rest. But she didn’t get to sleep in, as her mother-in-law bustled in at ten in the morning, suggesting they go spend her gift money.
“I can’t do this anymore, I don’t want to, do you get it?” Olivia asked her husband as soon as the door clicked shut behind her. “I’m not going anywhere, and I don’t care how she reacts.”
David didn’t go either, and Nina was hurt, staging another performance to tell everyone how her son and daughter-in-law don’t value or respect her. Within two months, Olivia persuaded her husband to move out to a rented flat to get some distance from his mother. Nina was upset, spreading the word that her daughter-in-law had “ruined her son’s life and showed absolute disrespect for his mother.” Nina considered herself the ideal mother with simply ungrateful children.
