La vida

Towards a Fresh Start: “Mum, how long are we going to rot in this backwater? We’re not even in a proper town—we’re in the back of beyond,” my daughter groaned, returning from the café with her favourite song on her lips. “I’ve told you a hundred times, Masha: this is our home, our roots. I’m not going anywhere.” Mum lay back on the couch, her tired legs propped on a cushion—her so-called “Churchill-relax” pose. “There you go again with the ‘roots, roots, roots’. Mum, if you stay here another ten years, you’ll have withered, and then another random, potato-loving chap you’ll want me to call Dad will come along.” Wounded, Mum got up and peered into the mirrored closet. “My roots are just fine, thank you very much…” “That’s what I’m saying—for now. But a bit longer and it’s all over—parsnip, turnip, or butternut squash—take your pick, chef’s choice.” “If you want to move so much, go ahead. You’ve been an adult for two years now—you can do anything that’s legal. Why do you need me?” “You know, for my conscience. If I run away to a better life, who’ll look after you?” “I’ve got an insurance policy, a steady salary, WiFi, and I’m sure I can find another ‘chap’—you said so yourself. It’s easy for you to pack up—you’re young, hip, understand memes, and don’t mind moody teens. Me? I’m halfway to Valhalla already.” “Oh, come on! You joke like my mates, and you’re only forty—” “Did you have to say it out loud? Just to ruin my day?” “In cat years, that’s just five,” my daughter quipped. “You’re forgiven.” “Mum. Before it’s too late—let’s just jump on a train and go. There’s nothing keeping us here.” “A month ago, I got them to finally print our surname right on the gas bill—and what about our GP registration?” Mum fired her last arguments. “We can see a doctor anywhere, and you don’t have to sell the house—you’ll always have a nest to come back to. Let’s get you out, show you what life is like!” “The sonographer did warn me you’d never let me rest. I thought he was joking—turns out he won bronze on ‘Britain’s Got Psychics’ later. Alright, let’s go—but if it doesn’t work, promise me you’ll let me come home without a meltdown.” “Scout’s honour!” “That’s what your co-parent promised in the registry office, and you two have the same blood type.” *** They skipped the county town and aimed straight for London. After cashing in three years’ savings, they splashed out on a studio flat between a market and a coach station, paying four months’ rent up front. The money ran out before they’d even unpacked. Masha was buzzing and dived headfirst into city life—artist circles, nightlife, social whirl. She fit in instantly: mixing with the locals, picking up the accent and the dress, as if she’d materialised straight from London air and pure confidence. Mum lived between doses of camomile tea in the morning and valerian at night. The job search started on day one, even though Masha coaxed her to get out and explore. London’s job ads offered salaries and expectations that didn’t quite add up. Mum did a quick calculation (no psychic required) and guessed: six months, max, then we’ll go back. She ignored her progressive daughter’s pleas and stuck with what she knew—got a job as a cook at a private school and in the evenings washed up at a local café. “Mum, you’re stuck at the stove again! You might as well not have moved. Try something new—designer, sommelier, even a brow artist. Have coffees, ride the Tube, adapt!” “I’m not ready for retraining, love. Don’t worry about me, I’ll settle. Just you focus on what you want.” While Masha sighed over her mother’s inability to be “progressive,” she made herself comfortable: in cafés where boys from out of town paid for coffee, in “networking” circles full of success talk, and on the mental plane, forging spiritual connections with London per her favourite blogger’s tips. She didn’t rush into work or relationships—she and the city needed time to get acquainted. After four months, Mum paid rent from her own wages, quit dishwashing, and began cooking at another branch of the school. Masha had ditched several courses, auditioned at a radio station, appeared as an extra in a student film (where her pay was pasta and tinned stew), and briefly dated two ‘busking musicians’: one was a real donkey, the other a multi-dad tomcat not ready to settle down. *** “Mum, do you want to do something tonight? Pizza, movie?” Masha yawned one evening in the “Churchill-relax” pose while Mum fussed with her hair. “Order whatever, I’ll transfer you the money. Don’t hold dinner back for me—I may not need it when I get back.” “Back from where?” Masha sat up, staring at her mum’s back. “I’ve got a dinner invite”—Mum giggled like a schoolgirl. “Who from?” Masha sounded decidedly unthrilled. “There was an Ofsted inspection at school. I made those meatballs you loved as a kid. The head of the inspection asked to meet the ‘head chef.’ We joked, had coffee—and tonight, well, I’m cooking him dinner.” “You’ve lost your mind! Going over to some random man’s house? For dinner?!” “So what?” “Haven’t you thought that he might not be after your food?” “Darling, I’m forty, single, he’s forty-five, smart, and attractive. Honestly, I’ll be happy with any of his expectations.” “You—You sound like some hopeless villager with no options.” “I don’t recognise you. You dragged me here to *live*, not exist.” Hard to argue with that. Masha suddenly realised they’d swapped roles, and that stung. She ordered the largest pizza she could and self-soothed with cheese until midnight, when her mother came in, glowing with happiness. “So? How was it?” Masha asked bleakly. “A lovely chap, definitely not a dodgy spud—local through and through.” Mum giggled and went to shower. Soon Mum was out on dates: theatre trips, a stand-up night, a jazz concert. She got a library card, joined the local tea appreciation club, re-registered with the local GP and, six months later, enrolled in professional courses, earning certificates and picking up gourmet cooking skills. Masha wasn’t wasting time, either. She tried for jobs at fancy firms. None worked out—each new “perfect” role slipped away. She lost most of her city friends once they stopped footing her bills, and so she became a barista, then quickly moved to a night shift bartender. Routine set in: dark circles, time lost, energy sapped, and no love life to speak of. The only suggestive remarks came from drunken clientele, who were nowhere near the English definition of a ‘pure romance’. In the end, Masha had had enough. “You know what, Mum? You were right—there’s nothing for us here. Sorry I dragged you—let’s go home,” Masha blurted after another rough bar shift. “What? Go where?” Mum asked, packing a suitcase. “Home, obviously—the place where our surname is finally correct on the gas bill, where our GP knows us. You were right from the start.” “I’m registered here now, and I don’t want to leave,” Mum stopped her and looked into her teary eyes to figure out the real problem. “Well, I do! I want to go home! I hate it here—the Tube’s daft, coffee costs more than steak, and everyone in the bar is so snooty. I have friends back home, a flat—there’s nothing keeping me here. Besides, you’re packing your stuff too!” “I’m moving in with Jeff,” Mum replied, matter-of-fact. “You’re what—moving in with Jeff?!” “Well, you’re sorted, paying your own way in the city—Masha, this is a gift! Strong, beautiful, with a job and a London flat. Your opportunities are endless—honestly! Thank you for making me leave. I’d have rotted in that bog if not for you. Here—life’s actually brimming! Thank you!” Mum kissed both her cheeks, but Masha wasn’t feeling it. “Mum, what about *me*? Who’ll look after me?!” she sobbed. “Insurance, salary, WiFi—and I’m sure you’ll find a nice ‘chap’ too,” Mum echoed her earlier words. “So you’re just abandoning me? Just like that?” “Not abandoning—you promised no drama, remember?” “Yeah… Alright, give me the keys.” “They’re in my bag. But, just one thing.” “What?” “Your gran wants to move too. I’ve sorted it all with her on the phone. Pop over and help her pack?” “Gran’s moving here?!” “Yep— I sold her the same story: better life, nice chaps, escape the bog. The post office nearby wants a new clerk, and after forty years in that ‘business’, she can send a letter to the North Pole without a stamp—and it’ll still get there! She should give it a go before her roots start wilting too.” A New Chapter: How Mum and Daughter Left Small-Town Stagnation for London’s Wild Ride, Swapped Roles, Faced Failures and Found Themselves—With Gran Soon to Follow

Towards a New Life Mum, how much longer are we going to rot in this dead-end? Were not even in a proper

La vida

The Kidnapping of the Century — “I want men to chase after me and weep because they can’t catch up!” Marina read her wish aloud and set the paper aflame, shaking the ashes into her sparkling wine and finishing her glass to the laughter of her friends. The Christmas tree twinkled brighter, the music swelled, glasses clinked, faces blurred together in a festive whirl. Suddenly, the tree showered golden dust—or so it seemed at the time… “Muuum… Mum, wake up!” Marina forced open one eye and found herself facing what looked like a football team of kids. “Who are you? Do I know you, children?” Giggling, the kids introduced themselves while tilting their heads: “Mum, remember—Matthew, 9 years old; Alex, 7; Sam, 5; David, 3!” The whole squad, full of mischief and determination. Not quite the kind of crowd of men Marina had wished would run after her on New Year’s Eve… “And where’s your coach… I mean, your dad?” she croaked. “Give your mum some water…” No sooner had she closed her eyes than—“Mu-um!”—two glasses of water, a clementine, and a mug of pickle juice appeared in her hands. At least the eldest already knew how to resuscitate mum after the holidays. They’re growing up. “Mum, get up. You promised…” the little ones begged. Marina tried to remember how she’d ended up here—and what exactly she had promised. “A film?” “No-oo!” “McDonald’s?” “No!” “The toy store?” “Come on, mum! You’re not fooling anyone! We’re nearly ready to go, but you won’t get up!” “Where are you all going? Can someone please tell your mother?” she finally surrendered. “Sweetheart, get up,” came a low male voice. Into the room walked a tall, dark-haired man with mischievous hazel eyes sparkling with gold flecks. Well now, what a dreamboat! “We’re ready, I’ve packed the car. We’ll stop at the supermarket on the way—then off we go!” Marina valiantly tried to recall who this man was, and why these children called her “mum.” Nothing. Not even a guess. “Mum, don’t forget our swimming trunks! And yours!” yelled someone from the children’s room. So, there’s even a pool? What kind of magic life is this—and why can’t I remember any of it…? Marina glanced around the unfamiliar room. The only familiar thing: a red Christmas poinsettia in a white pot with tiny pearl beads—her gift from last night. She began to retrace the thread of yesterday: a girls’ night out at a restaurant to celebrate New Year’s, Secret Santa like the good old student days—only now with pricey handbags, elaborate hairstyles, and not enough time. Married friends glowing with freedom for a change, while single, independent Marina, “the last of the bachelorettes,” as they call her, had no obligations. She remembered receiving that exact poinsettia, and a bottle of rare sparkling wine straight from a French château. She’d read out a wish or toast from a slip of paper—then…nothing. Blank. As the saying goes: ‘came—fell—woke up—in a cast!’ Looking in the mirror, she saw the same young woman as always—New Year’s makeup still perfect. But whose husband was that? Whose children? She didn’t remember giving birth, never-mind raising any of them. And though she somehow knew all the kids’ names, she didn’t know the husband’s. Something was off… Out in the hall: matching grown-up luggage and three sporty children’s rucksacks on wheels. Not a picnic then, but a proper trip? To where? Her “husband” reappeared; effortlessly hoisted the suitcases—muscle memory—and gently ushered her toward the door. “We’ll be late,” he said. She checked her hand and froze: no wedding ring—on either of them! One more oddity. Or…? The children piled into a big comfy minivan, seatbelts clicking into place with practiced familiarity. Her husband at the wheel, Marina’s heart pounded as she sat up front. He handed her a cup of coffee—white, with milk, which she despised. Oddly, that unsettled her most of all. “Let’s go!” he said cheerily, winking at the kids. As they left the city, Marina grew increasingly anxious. The family felt wrong—like strangers, even as she knew the children’s names! He had kidnapped them! No, they’d kidnapped her! But why could she name all the children? She was completely lost—but decided the only logical explanation was: “This man is a stranger. He’s kidnapped me. I need to act!” She stiffened in her seat, clutched her coffee, and put on her game face—ready for survival. Half an hour later, the kids revolted: “Dad, we need the loo!” “I’m hungry!” They stopped at a service station; everyone piled out. Here was her chance! Heart racing, Marina slipped away and darted to the car—only to find no keys in the ignition. “There you are! We were looking for you,” the man said cheerfully. “Come on then, let’s keep moving.” And off they went. An hour on, the airport loomed: glass, concrete, swarms of people. The “husband” parked, the family spilled out. Marina lagged behind—plotting escape. Suddenly she dashed away: “Help! I’m being kidnapped!” she cried, running to security. Within moments she was tackled, handcuffed, surrounded by guards. The “husband” hurried over. “Wait! It’s just a New Year’s prank—a joke! We’re not armed! It’s not a real kidnapping!” Voices blurred, and suddenly, like a film, she saw them: her friends hiding behind an advert board, giggling, sheepish, nervous and delighted. “Mum!” cried the kids—who promptly ran to one of the other women. Her friends rushed to the guards, overlapping each other with apologies, explanations, laughter: “Let her go!” The handcuffs came off. Her world stopped spinning. She was not a kidnap victim after all—just the subject of an elaborate, collective New Year’s prank with a dash of criminal drama. Her friends started chattering, breathless: they’d long wanted to introduce Marina to “a really nice bloke”—one who’d clearly had his eye on her for years, but never dared approach; he knew what she was like, always independent. So the idea was born, not to set them up, but plunge her straight into “family life”—kids, a calm but attentive man, even the morning coffee she hated. “We wanted you to feel, not overthink,” they confessed. Marina found herself unable to stay angry. Yes, it was drastic; yes, she almost had a heart attack—but it was a true experiment! Sometimes it takes one morning, three children, and a cup of coffee from your “kidnapper” to know if a man is right for you. There he was now: “Her romantic hero,” with that lopsided “Shrek Cat” grin and sparkling hazel eyes. The “kids” were revealed to be his nephews, thrilled to take part in Uncle’s big prank. “Oh, you’ll miss your flight!” the friends cried, bustling her along. “What, another kidnapping?” flashed through her mind. “And where were they planning to take me? The seaside? The Med? Mangoes and swimming?” He offered his hand. “Let’s try this again. I’m Vlad. Permission to ‘kidnap’ you?” he smiled, warm and inviting. Her friends watched, hopeful; the luggage waited. One last glance at those eyes, then the decision— “Let’s go!” said Marina, realising this “kidnapping” was the happiest adventure she could have wished for. And, almost in a whisper, she added: “But only if the kids stay home…” Laughter erupted, the airport blurred, and a new, funny, warm chapter began. Sometimes life doesn’t steal us away. It just whisks us, a bit too roughly, to exactly where we’re meant to be.

The Kidnapping of the Century I wish men would chase after me and weep because they cant catch up!

La vida

My Son Isn’t Ready to Be a Father… “Shameless! Ungrateful Pig!” screamed the mother at her daughter Natalie, not holding back. The sight of Natalie’s rounded belly did nothing to calm her mother’s wrath—if anything, it made it worse. “Get out! And don’t come back! I never want to see you again!” Her mum really did throw her out—she’d done it before for other things, but for getting pregnant, she meant it. With tears streaming down her face and a small suitcase, Natalie wandered to her boyfriend—the bewildered Nazar. Turns out, Nazar hadn’t even told his parents that Natalie was having his child. Nazar’s mum immediately asked if it was too late to “do something”; of course, it was—her belly was clearly showing. Natalie was so shocked and desperate she was ready for anything, even ideas she’d once protested. “My son’s not ready to be a father,” Nazar’s mother said firmly. “He’s too young, you’ll ruin his whole life. Of course we’ll help where we can, but for now I’ve found you a place at a centre for girls like you—unwanted pregnant fools.” At the centre, Natalie finally got a room to herself, some peace, and help from a psychologist as she prepared for the birth. When the big moment came, and her baby girl was placed in her arms, panic set in—but then she began to adjust, slowly getting to know her miracle daughter. Christmas drew near, but instead of joyful news, Natalie was told she’d need to find somewhere else—her room had a waiting list. With baby Eva in her arms, barely a month old, Natalie sat in her room, not knowing how they’d survive or who would help. Her mother’s heart never thawed—she wouldn’t even look at her granddaughter, erasing them both from her life. “How sad our Christmas Eve is, little one…” Natalie whispered to her daughter. She’d always loved the holiday, going carolling as a child and earning a bit of money. She desperately wanted that feeling back—the joy of singing door-to-door. Why not try, she thought? Her baby was quiet, she could bundle her up and go carolling. The next day, Natalie picked a quiet residential street for carols. Most households were reluctant to open the door to such an unusual caroller—they expected men, by tradition. But where she got in, she sang so beautifully and sincerely that people rewarded her with money and treats, especially moved by the sight of her baby. It was hard going, but with a decent sum in her pocket, she decided to try one more house—a fancy villa. “Rich folks, maybe I’ll get something good,” she thought. “May I sing you a Christmas carol?” she said as the man opened the door. But his reaction startled her—he stared at her face and the baby, turned pale, and slumped onto the sofa. “Nadine?” he whispered. “What? No—I’m Natalie…you must have me confused with someone else.” “Natalie… you look just like my wife. And is she—your baby—a girl?” “Yes.” “I had a little girl too. But they died…in a car crash. I dreamt just a few days ago they would come back to me. And now you’re here… Can it really be?” “I…I don’t know what to say…” “Please come in. Don’t be shy—tell me your story…” Natalie was nervous at first with the stranger’s emotional reaction, but she had nowhere else to go. Inside the spacious house, she saw a photo of the man’s late wife and child—they really did look like her and Eva. Then, for the first time, Natalie shared her whole story. She couldn’t stop, describing everything, every detail. Finally, someone cared to listen. And as she spoke, the man simply listened, glancing from time to time at the baby, who slept sweetly in his living room—as if she truly sensed she had finally come home to a place that, very soon, would become her own…

Shameless! Ungrateful pig! screamed her mother at her daughter, Emily, the moment she caught sight of her.

La vida

Valerie Was Washing Up in the Kitchen When John Came In and Turned Off the Light: A Story of a Miser’s Marriage, Penny-Pinching, and the Day She Finally Chose to Live Her Own Life

I was washing up in the kitchen when William walked in, flicking the light switch off before entering.

La vida

Oh, Not Again—Max, Get Him Away from There! Anna Shot a Disapproving Glance at Teddy, Bouncing Clumsily at Her Feet. How Did They End Up with Such a Nuisance? They Spent Ages Debating Breeds, Consulting Kennel Clubs, Weighing the Responsibility. In the End, They Chose a German Shepherd—Loyal Friend, Watchdog, Protector. All Three in One, Like a Multipurpose Cleaner. Only This ‘Protector’ Needed Saving from the Neighbourhood Cats… “He’s Still Just a Puppy. Wait Until He Grows Up—You’ll See.” “Right. Can’t Wait Until This Beast Gets Any Bigger. Have You Noticed He Eats More Than We Do? How Are We Supposed to Feed Him? And Stop Clomping Around—You’ll Wake the Baby!” Anna Grumbled, Gathering Up Shoes Teddy Had Scattered. They Lived on Churchill Road, Ground Floor of a Stately Old Victorian Block, Low Windows Almost Level with the Pavement. Perfect Place—If Not for One Thing: The Windows Looked Out Onto a Dead-End Courtyard, Where Shadows Would Flit in the Evenings, Men Gathered for a Chat, and Sometimes Fights Broke Out. Almost All Day, Anna Was Alone at Home with Newborn Katie. Max Left Early for His Curator Job at the National Gallery, Spending His Spare Time Haunting Car Boot Sales and Old Book Stalls. Trained Art Historian’s Eye, Diamond-Sharp, Anna Joked, Fished Out Works of Art, Rare Books, and Vintage Curios. He Was a Passionate Collector. Before They Knew It, Their Flat Held a Fine Collection of Paintings, and Their Sixties-Era Cabinet Displayed Delicate Chelsea Porcelain Plates, Socialist Realism Figurines, and Early Twentieth-Century Silverware… Anna Felt Uneasy Alone with All Those Treasures and a Tiny Daughter—Especially Since Burglaries Occurred in Their Building All Too Often. “Anna, When Do You Think Is Best for Me to Walk Teddy? Now or After Lunch?” “I Don’t Know. And Frankly, That’s Not My Dog Business!” At the Magic Word ‘Walk,’ Teddy Bolted Down the Hall—Slid Around the Corner—Snatched Up the Lead, Bounded Back, and Jumped Nearly to the Ceiling. What a Horse, Not a Dog! He Loved Everyone; Brought Every Guest His Ball Except Those He’d Block at the Door. Open Spirit, Right Old Lad—But He Was Supposed to Be Their Protector! He Didn’t Even Chase the Courtyard Cats. He’d Run to Them with His Ball, Just Delighted, Ready to Play, and Had Taken a Couple Smacks from the Local Tomcats for His Troubles. Their Cats Had More Bite Than Their Guard Dog—That’s Who They Needed for Protection! Tomorrow, She’d Be Alone Again. Max Was Off to Brighton for an Arts Festival, and What Was Anna Supposed to Do? Guard the Porcelain and Walk This Floppy-Eared Oaf? As If She Didn’t Have Enough To Do… At Dawn, Her Husband Got Up Quietly, Not Wanting to Wake Her—As If! Anna Heard the Kettle Hissing, the Jingle of the Lead, Max Whispering for Teddy Not to Whine or Stomp About. Those Peaceful Noises Drifted Her Back to Sleep, and When the Baby Woke Her, Max Was Gone. The Day Began as Usual. Just Another Ordinary, Peaceful, Normal Day—But Isn’t That Happiness, in Itself? Her Friends Would Sigh—Anna, Married So Young, Torn Between Husband and Daughter, Always in the Kitchen, Buried in Domestic Chores… But Isn’t There Beauty in the Everyday? Even If Life Wasn’t Quite as She’d Dreamed—She Was Tired of Max’s Frequent Absences, the Cramped Flat, Lack of Funds. And, Most of All, His Fiery Passion for Collecting, into Which So Much Money Disappeared… Now He’d Dragged Home This Floppy-Eared Friend, and Anna Was Left to Cope. But She Knew Love Means Embracing Faults and All—No One Promised Perfection. Realising That, She Decided to Cherish What She Had, Not Pines for What She Didn’t. She Sat in the Nursery Feeding Katie, Who’d Fall Asleep Mid-Feed and Leave Anna Waiting for Her to Wake and Nurse Again. There Was a Knock at the Door, but Anna Didn’t Answer. She Wasn’t Expecting Anyone, and Nobody Would Journey Across London Just to Drop In Unannounced. Those Precious Morning Hours—How She Loved Them! The House Was Quiet, Only the Parlour Clock Ticking, and Through the Window Came Those Familiar City Sounds: Distant Buses, Cars Puffing, a Broom Scraping Pavement, Children’s Voices… And Where Was the Oaf? Strangely Absent for Ages Now. Mind You, No One Could Really Call Teddy ‘Floppy-Eared’—His Ears Stood Up Properly; It Was Just His Character: Silly, and That’s That. Now She Was Stuck with Him—Feeding, Walking, and What Did He Actually Do? Might as Well Have Got a Pekingese. Anna Gazed Fondly at Katie, Who, Sated as a Leech, Had Unlatched from the Breast. What a Little Treasure They’d Made! “My Little Golden Girl,” Anna Whispered, Nestling Her Daughter. Grow Up—What More Could They Want? Just Then, a Strange Noise Came from the Lounge—a Crack, or Maybe a Squeal. Anna Listened. The Noise Came Again. Not Breathing, She Slipped Off Her Slippers and Glide to the Lounge. The First Thing She Saw Was Teddy’s Back—Crouched Behind the Curtain Dividing the Front Hall from the Lounge. Four Feet Bent, He Was Frozen, Tense, Tongue Lolling, Eyes Fixed Deep into the Room. Anna Followed His Gaze and Went Cold: There, Halfway Through the Window, Was a Man—Or Half of Him. Typical Thug—Shaved Head, Arms and Shoulders Already in the Room, Grunting and Straining to Force His Lean, Sinewy Body Through. Anna Couldn’t Believe This Was Happening. It Couldn’t Be! What To Do—Shout? The Man Was Almost Fully Inside! Another Second and— She Jumped at a Yell. A Black Shadow Darted to the Window; Only Afterward Did She Register: It Was Teddy. He Leapt onto the Sill and Sank His Teeth into the Burglar’s Neck! “Aaaahhh!!” the Man Roared, Eyes Bulging with Fear. Anna Ran onto the Landing, Shouted for the Neighbours—After That, It Wasn’t So Frightening. People Rushed In, the Police Came. Everyone Tried to Help, Though There Was Little to Do—their Presence Itself Was Comforting. What Would She Have Done Alone? Summoning Her Courage, Anna Edged Closer: What If Teddy Tore the Man’s Throat Out? That Was All She Needed! But Clever Teddy Had Clamped Firmly onto the Collar, Not the Flesh—Held the Man Tight, Not Drawing Blood! Only When the Burglar Struggled Did Teddy Grip Harder. If He Went Still—It Was, “All Right, Guv, Message Received”—and Teddy Would Ease His Hold. How Did He Know to Do All This? This Ball-Chasing Clown Acted Like a Trained Professional. He’d Heard Something, Gone to Check Quietly, Laid in Ambush Behind the Curtain, Let the Burglar Crawl Halfway in (So He Got Stuck and Couldn’t Bolt) Before Pouncing, Holding Him in a Professional, Controlled Way—Not Choking, Not Hurting. “Our Job Is Just to Hold,” You Could Almost Hear Him Think, “Let Justice Take Care of the Rest.” Even the Oldest Police Veterans Couldn’t Recall a Burglar So Happy to Be Arrested. The Man, White with Terror from Teddy’s Teeth, Surrendered Eagerly—whereas the Dog Was Reluctant to Relinquish His Prize. Teddy Was So Proud, So Deep in His Role, That Only the Arrival of a Police Dog Handler Convinced Him to Let Go. At the Officer’s Command—He Released, Spitting Out the Burglar, and Sat by the Window, Gazing Up Devotedly, Awaiting Orders—Ready for Review, Practically Saluting. “You’ve Got a Good Dog There,” the Officer Said Admiringly, Ruffling Teddy’s Ears. “We Could Use One Like Him in the Force…” Max Came Home Late That Evening, Tiptoed in—and Froze. There Was Plenty to Be Surprised About. First: Teddy Lolling on the Sofa—Strictly Forbidden, Never Allowed. Second: Lying in Utterly Contented, Outrageously Sprawled Pose, While Anna Scratched His Tummy, Patted and Stroked Him and Nearly Kissed Him, Murmuring, “My Delight, Little Lamb, Our Darling Pony—Grow Up Big and Strong for Mum and Dad! How Unfair I’ve Been to You—Don’t Be Cross…” This Story Was Told to Me at One of the Brighton Art Festivals by the Man Himself—the Curator. Teddy Might Have Told It More Vividly: How He Stalked, How He Tackled, How He Handed Over the Suspect to the Police. It Was Long Ago, but the Story Lived on in Memory—I Felt Teddy’s Paw Scratching, Yearning to Be Set Down on Paper. Now I’ve Shared It with You…

Oh, hes licking himself again! Tom, can you get him off? Emily huffed, watching Charlie, their clueless

La vida

012

“Forgive Me, Son, There’s No Dinner Tonight,” Cried the Mother… a Millionaire Overheard “Mummy… I’m hungry.” Lucy pressed her lips together to stop them trembling. Four-year-old Matthew only knew a language no child should ever learn: that hunger nothing can comfort. She stroked his hair with one hand, the other gripping a bag ridiculously light with empty plastic bottles collected all day. “We’ll eat something soon, sweetheart,” she murmured. But the lie burned her throat. She’d lied too many times that week, not out of habit but in desperation. Because telling a child the truth is tossing them to the ground without a mattress. The supermarket sparkled with Christmas lights: golden garlands, cheerful music, people pushing overflowing trolleys. The scent of fresh bread and cinnamon—a luxury to Lucy. London was beautiful that night as if the city wore a festive gown… but she walked in worn-out shoes, deliberately, so Matthew wouldn’t see her fear. Matthew stopped in front of a mountain of sweet bread wrapped in shiny paper. “Can we get one this year? Like last year with Grandma…” Last year. Lucy felt the blow in her chest. Last year, her mother was alive. Last year she had a stable cleaning job and at least a table to eat at, a roof not fogged inside like the borrowed car they’d slept in for two weeks. “No, my love… not this year.” “Why?” Because the world can break apart without warning. Because your child’s fever matters more than any shift. Because a boss can sack you for missing a day, even if your child burns in your arms at A&E. Because rent won’t wait, food won’t wait, nor will sorrow. Lucy swallowed and forced herself to smile. “Because tonight we’re doing something different. Come help me return the bottles.” They walked aisles where everything promised ‘yes,’ but really whispered ‘not for you.’ Fizzy drinks, biscuits, chocolates, toys. Matthew gazed at everything wide-eyed. “Can I have some juice tonight?” “No, darling.” “What about chocolate biscuits…?” “No.” “And plain ones…?” Lucy replied sharper than she meant to and saw Matthew’s face fall, a little light flickering out. Her heart broke again—how many times can a heart be broken before it disappears? They reached the recycling machine. Lucy fed in bottle after bottle. Mechanical sounds, creeping numbers. Ten bottles. Ten tiny chances. The machine spat out a voucher. Twenty-five pence. Lucy stared at it as if it was mocking her. Twenty-five. Christmas Eve. Matthew clung to her hand with painful hope. “Now we’ll get food, won’t we? I’m really hungry.” Something inside Lucy broke. Until that moment she’d clung to life with her teeth, but her son’s trusting gaze shattered her last defense. She couldn’t lie anymore. Not tonight. She led him to the fruit and veg section. Shiny red apples, perfect oranges, tomatoes like jewels. Surrounded by someone else’s abundance, she knelt before him and took his little hands. “Matthew… Mummy has something very hard to tell you.” “What is it, Mummy? Why are you crying?” Lucy hadn’t even noticed the tears, they fell freely—her body knew before she did that she couldn’t keep going. “Son… forgive me. This year… there is no dinner.” Matthew frowned, confused. “But… aren’t we going to eat?” “We don’t have money, sweetheart. We don’t have a home. We sleep in the car… and Mummy lost her job.” Matthew looked around at all the food as if the world had betrayed him. “But… there’s food here.” “Yes, but it’s not ours.” Then Matthew cried—not yelling, but with that silent sob that burns more than tantrums. His small shoulders shook. Lucy hugged him desperately, as if squeezing him could bring a miracle. “Forgive me… forgive me for giving you so little.” “Excuse me, madam.” Lucy looked up. A security guard watched, awkward, as if poverty stained the floor. “If you’re not buying anything, you’ll need to leave—you’re disturbing other customers.” Lucy wiped her face, embarrassed. “We’re leaving…” “Not now, madam—she’s with me.” A voice from behind called out, firm, calm. Lucy turned and saw a tall man in a dark suit, grey at the temples, with an empty shopping trolley and an imposing manner. He looked at the guard—not raising his voice, but with authority. “They’re my family. I came to find them so we can shop together.” The guard hesitated, looking between Lucy’s worn clothes, Matthew’s hungry face, and the smart man… then finally yielded. “Very well, sir. Apologies.” When the guard left, Lucy stood unsure whether to be grateful or to flee. “I don’t know who you are,” she said, standing upright, “and we don’t need—” “Yes, you do.” His voice wasn’t cruel. It was simply true. He met her eyes. “I heard you. No one should go hungry at Christmas—especially a child.” He knelt to Matthew’s level with a gentle smile. “Hello. My name’s Sam.” Matthew hid behind his mother’s leg but peeked out. “What’s your name?” Silence. Sam didn’t push. He just asked: “Tell me—if you could eat anything for dinner tonight, what would it be?” Matthew looked at Lucy for permission. He didn’t understand it all, but there was no mockery, no dirty pity, no intrusive curiosity in the man’s eyes—just humanity. “You can answer, sweetheart,” she whispered. “Breaded meatballs… with mashed potatoes,” Matthew said, barely audible. Sam nodded like he’d received the world’s most important order. “Perfect. That’s my favourite dinner, too. Come, help me.” He started pushing the trolley. Lucy followed, her heart hammering, expecting a catch, a condition, hidden humiliation—but there was none. Sam filled the trolley with meat, potatoes, breadcrumbs, salad, juice, fruit. Whenever Matthew pointed, Sam added—no counting, no sighing at prices. At the till, he paid as if for a coffee. Lucy saw the final number and reeled—it was more than she’d earned in two weeks of work. “We can’t accept this,” she stammered, shaking. Sam looked seriously at her. “What you told your son… no one should ever have to say that. Please let me do this.” In the car park, Lucy headed for her battered old Ford. It looked sad beside Sam’s black BMW. He understood instantly—the mess of blankets, small bag of clothes. “Where will you go after this?” he asked. Silence. “Nowhere,” Lucy admitted. “We sleep here.” Sam laid the shopping bags down, ran a hand through his hair at the weight of reality. “My hotel has a restaurant. It’s open tonight. Come have dinner with me. Afterwards… we’ll see. But at least tonight, you won’t be stuck in the car.” He handed her a business card: The Emperor Hotel. Lucy gripped the card as if it burned. When Sam left, Matthew tugged her sleeve. “Let’s go, Mum. We’ll have breaded meatballs.” Lucy looked at her son, at the car, at the card. She had no choice. And, without knowing it, accepting that dinner began something huge—a door that could save her, or hurt her even more if it was just an illusion. The restaurant was another world: white linen, warm lights, gentle music, fresh flowers. Matthew clung to his mother’s hand. In worn clothes, Lucy felt everyone staring, though no one really did. “They’re my guests,” Sam told the waiter. “Order anything you like.” At first Matthew ate slowly, afraid someone might take away his plate. Then faster, with an old hunger that won’t heal overnight. Lucy watched, throat tight: her son called it “the most delicious meal ever,” which, to her, was tragic in disguise. Sam didn’t probe immediately. He talked about simple things, asked Matthew about dinosaurs. Matthew pulled out a battered toy T-rex from his pocket, with worn claws. “He’s called Rex,” Matthew said proudly. “He protects me at night.” Sam looked at him with restrained sadness. “T-rexes are the strongest,” he replied. Later, after chocolate smeared his cheek from dessert, Sam finally asked gently: “Lucy… how did you end up here?” And Lucy told her story—her mother’s passing, lost jobs, hospital visits, eviction, a father who vanished when Matthew was a baby. Sam listened quietly, as if every word confirmed something. “My hotel needs cleaners,” he eventually said. “Legal contract, fixed hours, all above board. There are staff flats—small but decent.” Lucy eyed him warily, because even hope is frightening. “Why are you doing this?” “Because I need staff,” he replied, then added softly, “and because no child should live in a car.” The next day, Lucy returned. The manager, Patricia Miles, ran a normal interview—nothing remarkable. Three days later, Lucy and Matthew entered an apartment with real windows for the first time. Matthew ran from room to room like he’d discovered a new planet. “It’s ours, Mum? Really?” “Yes, sweetheart… it’s ours.” That first night, Matthew slept in a bed… but woke often crying, checking his mother was still there. Lucy found biscuits tucked under his pillow—her son stocking up in case hunger came back. Poverty doesn’t vanish when you move—it lingers inside for a while, a background noise. Sam visited often. He brought books, talked openly with Matthew, played football in the park. On his birthday, he appeared with a dinosaur-shaped cake. Matthew made his wish aloud, no shame: “I wish Uncle Sam would stay forever! Never leave!” Sam knelt, eyes wet. “I’ll do everything I can to make that come true.” Then trouble arrived—in the form of a rumour in the building. Rumours spread to the one person who shouldn’t have heard. Rob, the biological father, turned up at the hotel lobby smelling of lager, wearing a fake smile. “I’m here to see my son,” he said. “I have rights.” Lucy could barely breathe. Sam stood guard. Rob shouted, threatened, promised court action—and delivered: paperwork followed demanding visitation, joint custody. The documents called Lucy “a woman of questionable circumstances.” Sam was “the employer confusing the boy.” It all sounded dignified on paper; it was poison. The first supervised visit was a disaster. Matthew clung to Sam’s leg. Rob tried to grab him; Matthew screamed. That night, the boy had nightmares, crying that he’d be taken away, never see Mum or “Daddy Sam” again. “I wish you were my dad,” Sam confessed one early morning, sitting on the boy’s bed. “More than anything.” “So… why can’t you be?” No easy answer—only a hard decision. The lawyer was clear: as a married couple, Sam could adopt. The family would look stable to the judge. Lucy’s fear was huge, but the truth was there, quietly growing—Sam didn’t stay out of duty. He stayed out of love. “It wouldn’t be a lie,” he said one afternoon, voice trembling. “I fell for you watching you be a mum. And I love him… because you just do.” Lucy, who had survived for years without dreaming, said “yes” through tears—not of defeat, but something new: relief. The wedding was simple. Civil. Patricia was witness. Matthew, in a tiny suit, carried the rings, serious as a treasure guard. “We’re a real family now!” Matthew shouted as they were declared husband and wife—and everyone laughed through tears. The hearing was revealing. Rob, in a suit, played the penitent victim. Sam described that Christmas Eve in the supermarket—Lucy kneeling, begging forgiveness for no dinner, how he couldn’t close his eyes. Lucy spoke of four years of absence and silence. The judge considered everything—papers, letters, medical records Rob was absent from. Testimonies from nursery, hotel, videos of simple routines: bedtime stories, laughter, breakfasts. Then, the judge asked to speak with Matthew privately. Lucy nearly fainted with panic. In the judge’s office, they were given juice and biscuits. Matthew spoke the purest truth: “Before, we lived in a car and it wasn’t nice. Now I have my own room. We have food. Mum laughs.” “Who’s your dad?” asked the judge. Matthew didn’t hesitate. “Sam. My dad is Sam. The other man… I don’t know him. He makes mum cry. And I never want mum to cry again.” When the judge pronounced their fate, time seemed to freeze. Full custody to Lucy. Supervised visits, only if the child wanted—and only for a limited period. Sam granted permission to start adoption. Rob left screaming threats, fading down the corridor. He never returned. Never asked for visits. He didn’t want a child—he wanted control, advantage, money. When that failed, he vanished. On the courthouse steps, Matthew stood between both his parents, held in an embrace that finally knew no fear. “So… I get to stay with you forever?” he asked. “Forever,” they both replied. Months later, the adoption certificate arrived stamped with official seals that only confirmed what his heart already knew. Matthew Oliver Miles. Sam framed it and hung it on the wall like a medal won in the fiercest battle. They swapped the flat for a house with a garden. Matthew chose his room and set Rex in a special place, though sometimes he still carried him “just in case.” Not because he doubted his family, but the little boy he’d been hadn’t vanished—he was learning, slowly, that safety could be real. One Saturday, Sam proposed a trip to the supermarket—the same one as Christmas Eve. They entered hand in hand, Matthew bouncing between them, talking non-stop. He picked oranges, apples and dinosaur-shaped cereal. Lucy watched her son and felt something she’d thought impossible: peace. At the fruit aisle, Matthew stopped at the spot where she’d once knelt and wept. He took an apple, set it carefully in the cart, and announced: “For our house.” Lucy blinked back tears. Sam squeezed her hand. They said nothing—sometimes the best things aren’t spoken, they’re felt. That night, the three dined at their table. Matthew told silly jokes about the garden, Sam pretended they were the best, and Lucy laughed with all her heart—because her body was no longer on guard. Later, as always, Sam read bedtime stories. Three. Matthew fell asleep halfway through the second, Rex peaceful at his chest. Lucy stood, watching from the doorway—thinking of the woman she’d been: apologising for no dinner, sleeping in a borrowed car, believing life was just survival. And she understood: sometimes, at the darkest moment, a single act of humanity sets off a chain of miracles. Not movie miracles. True ones. Work. A roof. Fresh bread. Bedtime stories. A helping hand. And, above all, a child who was no longer hungry or afraid—because at last, he had what he’d always deserved: a family who would never leave.

Forgive me, love, theres no supper tonight, cried his mother And a gentleman overheard. Mummy Im hungry.

La vida

The Kidnapping of the Century: All I Wanted Was to Have Men Chasing After Me and Crying They Couldn’t Catch Up! Instead, I Woke Up After a Wild New Year’s Party to Find Myself Surrounded by a Mystery Husband, Four Mischievous Children, and a Family Holiday I Couldn’t Remember—Was This the Start of My Dream Life, or Had I Just Been Abducted?

The Kidnapping of the Year I just want men chasing after me, crying because they cant catch up!

La vida

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My Mother-in-Law Used to Mock My Mum for Cleaning Other People’s Houses… Today She’s the One Cleaning Mine

My mother-in-law used to mock my mum for cleaning other peoples homes Now she cleans mine. Ill never

La vida

One Fateful Day: My Wife Unexpectedly Crossed Paths with a New Woman. How Did That Meeting Unfold?

27 March 2023 My marriage ended a few months ago, and I’ve since moved into a modest flat in Croydon.

La vida

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“When Was the Last Time You Truly Looked at Yourself in the Mirror?” he asked. His Wife’s Surprising Response Changed Everything Alex sipped his morning coffee, stealing glances at Marina. Her hair was tied back with a child’s hairband, decorated with cartoon kittens. Next door, Ksenia always seemed vibrant and fresh, her expensive perfume lingering in the lift. “You know,” Alex put his phone down, “sometimes I feel like we live together… well, more like neighbours.” Marina paused, cleaning rag frozen in her hand. “What do you mean?” “Oh, nothing. Just… when did you last really look at yourself in the mirror?” She looked at him closely. Alex realised things weren’t going as he expected. “When was the last time you looked at me?” Marina replied softly. An awkward pause hung between them. “Marina, don’t make this a drama. I just mean—a woman should always look amazing. It’s basic! Look at Ksenia, and she’s your age.” “Ah,” Marina said. “Ksenia.” Her tone made Alex uneasy, as if something important had suddenly dawned on her. “Alex,” she said after a moment, “let’s do this. I’ll move in with Mum for a bit. Think about what you said.” “Fine. We’ll live separately, think things through. But I’m not throwing you out!” “You know,” Marina hung the rag carefully on a hook, “maybe I really do need to look in the mirror.” She went to pack her suitcase. Alex sat in the kitchen, thinking: “This is what I wanted.” But somehow, it didn’t feel satisfying—more empty than anything. For three days, Alex lived in a kind of holiday: coffee in the morning, no rush, evenings doing what he liked. No melodramatic TV shows. Freedom, right? Real, man’s freedom. One evening, Alex bumped into Ksenia by the block entrance. She carried bags from Waitrose, tottering in heels and a perfect dress. “Alex!” she smiled. “How are you? Haven’t seen Marina lately.” “She’s at her mum’s. Taking a break,” he lied easily. “Ah.” Ksenia nodded knowingly. “Women need a respite now and then. From housework, from routine.” She spoke as if she’d never set foot in household drudgery herself, as if dinner just materialised. “Ksenia, maybe we could grab coffee sometime? Just as neighbours.” “That’d be lovely,” she smiled. “Tomorrow night?” Alex spent the night planning. Which shirt? Jeans or chinos? Don’t overdo the aftershave. In the morning the phone rang. “Alex?” Came an unfamiliar voice. “It’s Ludmila, Marina’s mum.” His heart skipped a beat. “Yes, I’m listening.” “Marina asked me to say she’ll pick up her things on Saturday when you’re out. She’ll leave the keys with the concierge.” “Wait, she’s picking up her things?” “What did you expect?” There was steel in the mother-in-law’s voice. “My daughter isn’t going to spend her life waiting for you to decide if you need her.” “I didn’t say anything like that—” “You said quite enough. Goodbye, Alex.” She hung up. Alex sat at the kitchen table, staring at his phone. What the hell? He wasn’t getting divorced! He’d just asked for a break—to think. They’d decided everything without him. Coffee with Ksenia felt strange. She was pleasant, chatted about her banking job, laughed at his jokes. But when he tried to take her hand, she gently pulled away. “Alex, understand—I can’t. You’re married.” “But we’re… well, living apart now.” “For now. What about tomorrow?” Ksenia looked at him, searching. Alex walked Ksenia home and went back to his quiet, bachelor-smelling flat. Saturday. Alex deliberately left, to avoid drama or tears. Let her take her things in peace. By three o’clock he was jittery with curiosity. What did she take? Everything? Just essentials? And how did she look? At four he couldn’t stand it and went home. Outside was a car with local plates. At the wheel, a man around forty, good-looking, in a nice jacket, helping someone load boxes. Alex sat on a bench and waited. Ten minutes later, out stepped a woman in a blue dress. Her dark hair was in a beautiful clip—no childish hairbands. Her makeup highlighted her eyes. Alex stared in disbelief. It was Marina. But different. She carried the last bag. The man instantly helped her, gently seating her in the car—handling her like crystal. Alex couldn’t help himself. He walked up to the car. “Marina!” She turned. Her face was calm and beautiful. Not tired as he remembered. “Hello, Alex.” “Is that… you?” The man at the wheel tensed, but Marina softly assured him it was fine. “Yes,” she answered simply. “You just haven’t really looked at me in a long time.” “Marina, wait. Can we talk?” “About what?” No anger in her voice, just surprise. “You said a woman should look amazing. So I listened.” “But that’s not what I meant!” Alex’s heart was pounding. “What did you want, Alex?” Marina tilted her head. “For me to become beautiful, just for you? Interesting, but only at home? To love myself, but not so much that I’d leave a husband who couldn’t see me?” He listened, and with every word, something inside him shifted. “You know,” Marina said gently, “I realised I’d stopped caring for myself. But not because I was lazy—because I’d got used to being invisible in my own house, my own life.” “Marina, I didn’t mean—” “You did. You wanted an invisible wife—who does everything, but doesn’t get in your way. And when you’re bored, you trade up for a brighter model.” The man in the car said something quietly. Marina nodded. “We have to go, Alex. Vladimir’s waiting.” “Vladimir?” Alex’s mouth went dry. “Who’s that?” “A man who sees me.” Marina answered. “We met at the gym—Mum’s flat is near a fitness centre. Imagine, at forty-two I went to my first ever workout class.” “Marina, don’t. Let’s try again. I get it now—I was an idiot.” “Alex,” she looked at him carefully, “do you remember the last time you said I was beautiful?” He fell silent. He couldn’t remember. “The last time you asked how I was?” And Alex realised—he’d lost. Not to Vladimir, nor circumstances. To himself. Vladimir started the engine. “Alex, I’m not angry. Really. Thanks to you, I understood something important: if I can’t see myself, no one else will.” The car drove away. Alex sat on the bench and watched his life leave—not just his wife, but the last fifteen years he’d considered routine, and now understood was happiness. He just hadn’t realised it before. Six months later, Alex bumped into Marina at the shopping centre—by chance. She was picking out coffee beans, reading labels carefully. Next to her, a young woman—about twenty. “Let’s get this one,” she said. “Dad says arabica’s better than robusta.” “Marina?” Alex approached. She turned and smiled easily. “Hello, Alex. Meet Nastya, Vladimir’s daughter. Nastya, this is Alex, my ex-husband.” Nastya nodded politely—pretty, probably a uni student. She looked at Alex curiously, with no hostility. “How are you?” he asked. “Good. And you?” “Not bad.” An awkward pause. What do you say to an ex-wife who’s changed so much? They stood amidst the coffee shelves, and Alex looked at her—tanned, new haircut, light blouse. Happy—genuinely happy. “And you?” she asked. “How’s your love life?” “Not much happening,” he admitted. Marina looked at him thoughtfully. “You want a woman—beautiful like Ksenia, quiet like I used to be. Smart, but not so smart she’ll notice the way you look at others.” Nastya listened wide-eyed. “That woman doesn’t exist,” Marina said calmly. “Marina, let’s go?” Nastya chimed in. “Dad’s waiting in the car.” “Yes, of course.” Marina grabbed the coffee. “Good luck, Alex.” They walked off. Alex stood amid coffee shelves, thinking: Marina was right. He was searching for a woman who didn’t exist. That evening Alex sat in his kitchen, drank tea. Remembered Marina, who she’d become. Sometimes, losing something is the only way to realise how valuable it was. Maybe happiness isn’t about finding the ‘perfect wife’. It’s about learning to see the woman beside you.

When was the last time you looked at yourself in the mirror? David asked his wife. Catherine responded