Walton Merritt

My husband has always told me I’m not feminine enough. At first, he’d hint casually—saying if I wore more makeup, put on dresses, or acted “softer,” things would be better. But I’ve never been that kind of woman. I’ve always been practical, straightforward, not fussy. I work hard, solve problems, get things done. That’s always been me, and he knew it—I never pretended to be anyone else. Over time, his comments became more frequent. He started comparing me to women we saw on social media, to our friends’ wives, to colleagues. He’d say I looked more like a mate than a wife. I’d listen, sometimes we’d argue, but then we carried on. I never thought it was a big deal—just a difference in our relationship. But the day I buried my father, nothing seemed trivial anymore. I was numb. I couldn’t sleep or eat—my only thought was somehow getting through the funeral. I put on the first black clothes I found, skipped my makeup, barely touched my hair; I had no energy for anything else. Before we left, my husband looked at me and said, “Are you really going like that? Won’t you at least make a bit of an effort?” At first, I didn’t understand. I told him I didn’t care how I looked—I’d just lost my dad. He replied, “Still… people will talk. You look completely run-down.” I felt something strange, as if I’d been crushed from the inside. At the service, he mingled with the guests, offered condolences, looked serious. But he was distant with me—hardly touched me, didn’t ask how I was. When we passed a mirror, he quietly said I should “pull myself together a bit more,” that my dad wouldn’t want to see me in such a state. Back home after the funeral, I asked if my appearance really was all he’d noticed that day. If he saw how devastated I really was. He told me not to overreact; he was just sharing his opinion, that a woman shouldn’t let herself go “even at times like these.” Since then, I see him differently. But I can’t leave him. I feel like I can’t live without him. ❓ What would you say to this woman if she were sitting in front of you?

My husband always used to say that I wasnt quite ladylike enough. At first, it was just the odd remarkhow

La vida

06

A Week Before the Wedding, She Told Me She Didn’t Want to Get Married – Everything Was Already Paid: The Venue, the Documents, the Rings, Even Part of the Family Reception. For Months, I Organised Every Detail, Convinced I Was Doing the Right Thing as a Partner, Always Covering All the Costs, Giving My Heart, Only to Discover She Felt Trapped by My Love and Never Wanted to Marry at All – That Week, I Learned Being the Man Who Pays for Everything Doesn’t Mean Someone Wants to Stay With You.

The wedding was set for the following week when she told me she didnt want to marry after all.

La vida

012

My Husband Never Cheated, But Years Ago He Stopped Being My Partner – Seventeen Years Together, From Young Love to Living Like Roommates Behind Closed Doors

My husband never cheated on me, but years ago, he stopped being my husband. Seventeen years togetherI

La vida

05

I’m 38 and Spent Years Thinking I Was the Problem: That I Was a Bad Mum, a Bad Wife, That Something Was Wrong With Me Even Though I Was Doing It All—But Inside, I Felt Completely Empty Every Day at 5am I’d Make Breakfasts, Pack Lunchboxes, Prepare Uniforms, Get the Kids Ready for School, Tidy the House, Head to Work, Stick to Schedules, Meet Deadlines, Attend Meetings—Always With a Smile. No One at Work Had a Clue. At Home, Everything Ran Like Clockwork: Lunch, Chores, Bath Time, Dinner, Listening to the Kids’ Stories, Sorting Their Squabbles, Giving Hugs, Fixing Problems. To Outsiders, My Life Seemed Perfect—A Family, Job, Good Health. No Visible Tragedy to Explain How Empty I Felt. It Wasn’t Sadness—It Was Exhaustion That Sleep Couldn’t Fix. I Woke Up Tired, My Body Ached, Noise Irritated Me, Repetitive Questions Drained Me. Sometimes I’d Wonder—Ashamed—If My Kids Would Be Better Off Without Me, If I Just Wasn’t Cut Out to Be a Mum. I Never Missed a Responsibility, Never Lost My Cool More Than ‘Normal.’ So No One Noticed. Not Even My Partner—If I Said I Was Tired, He’d Say, “Every Mum Gets Tired.” If I Lacked Motivation, He’d Call It ‘Laziness.’ So I Stopped Saying Anything. Some Evenings I’d Sit in the Bathroom in Silence, Not Crying, Just Staring at the Wall. The Thought of Leaving Came Quietly, Not as Drama but as Cold Logic: Disappear for a Few Days, Stop Being Needed—Not Because I Didn’t Love My Kids, but Because I Had Nothing Left to Give. The Day I Hit Rock Bottom Wasn’t Dramatic—Just an Ordinary Tuesday. My Child Asked for Simple Help, and I Just Stared at Him, Head Empty, Chest Tight. I Sat Down on the Kitchen Floor, Unable to Get Up. My Son Looked Afraid: “Mum, Are You OK?” I Couldn’t Even Answer. Nobody Came to Help. No One Came to Save Me. I Just Couldn’t Pretend to Be ‘Fine’ Anymore. I Only Sought Help When I Had Nothing Left. The Therapist Was the First to Say What No One Had: “This Isn’t Because You’re a Bad Mum.” And She Told Me What Was Really Wrong. I Realized No One Helped Me Because I Never Stopped Functioning—As Long as a Woman Keeps Doing Everything, the World Assumes She Can Keep Going. No One Asks About the Ones Who Never Fall. Recovery Wasn’t Quick or Magical—It Was Slow, Uncomfortable, and Guilt-Ridden: Learning to Ask for Help, to Say ‘No,’ to Not Always Be Available. Understanding That Rest Doesn’t Mean You’re a Bad Mum. I’m Still Raising My Kids. I Still Work. But I No Longer Pretend to Be Perfect. I Don’t Think One Mistake Defines Me. And Most of All—I Don’t Believe Wanting to Run Away Means I’m a Bad Mum. I Was Just Exhausted.

Im thirty-eight, and for the longest time I thought the fault must be mine. That I was a bad mother

La vida

04

What’s Cut Short Can Never Be Restored When Tanya Showed Off Her Wedding Photos, She Always Laughed, “Oh, I Suffered in That Dress! It Was Beautiful, But So Heavy and Bulky. Next Time I Get Married, I’ll Choose a Light and Airy Wedding Dress.” Everyone Thought Tania Was Joking, Because Her Marriage to Oleg—A Whirlwind Holiday Romance from Brighton to Blackpool—Was Pure Love. At 21, She Left Her London Life to Be with 28-Year-Old Oleg in Liverpool, After He Divorced His Second Wife, Gave Her the Flat, and Promised to Start Fresh. For Ten Years, Tanya Navigated the Liverpool–London–Liverpool Circuit, Juggled Ambitions, Education, and Family. With Their Daughter Masha, Career Hopes, and the Quest for More Than Marriage and Motherhood, Tanya Chased Her Own Freedom Just as Oleg Tried to Hold Their Family Together. In Time, Oleg Moved Back Up North With Masha, Found Simple Happiness With Down-to-Earth Beth, and Left Weddings Abroad and Designer Shoes Behind. Meanwhile, Tanya’s Dreamy Independence Unraveled in London, Her Business Collapsed, Suitors Disappeared, and She Ended Up Teaching Psychology at a Local School, Still Searching for Deeper Meaning. Years On, Masha Grows Up, Marries in Liverpool, and Wears the Light, Airy Wedding Dress Her Mother Once Longed For.

WHATS GONE CANT BE UNDONE Whenever Alice showed her wedding photos to friends, she always laughed and

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07

One Day, My Distant Aunt Rang and Invited Me to Her Daughter’s Wedding—a Cousin I Last Saw When She Was Six. Not Exactly Awash with Family Sentiment, I Tried to Dodge the Invite, but Auntie Was Having None of It: “Once Every Twenty Years, You Can Show Your Face—Don’t Even Think About Skipping.” Next Thing I Know, an Invitation with Doves and Roses from Chloe and Anthony Arrives, I Get a Firm Reminder, and the Fateful Saturday Is Lost. So, Armed with a Bouquet, a Miserable Mood, and a Plan to Make a Swift Irish Exit, I Turn Up at the Restaurant—Only to Be Seated Among the Groom’s Rowdy Mates, Toasted as the ‘Young and Glamorous Aunt,’ and Plunged into the Wrong Wedding Altogether—Complete with Disapproving Aunties, a Bewildered Bride and Groom, and the Realisation I’d Stepped into a Comic Family Feud, Saved Only by a Kindly Waiter and a Last-Minute Rescue by My Actual Aunt.

One night, my distant aunt rang me up and invited me to her daughters weddingmy distant cousin whom I

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07

My Cat Slept with My Wife, Shoved Me Off the Bed, and Ruled the House—How a Cheeky Furry Tyrant Stole My Spot, Mocked Me Over Breakfast, Declared War, Then Saved Our Lives Before Breaking His Own Paw in the Chaos, and Taught Us All About Real Happiness

The tomcat slept with my wife. He pressed his furry back against her, stretching out all four paws to

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04

My Cat Slept with My Wife, Shoved Me Off the Bed, and Ruled the House—How a Cheeky Furry Tyrant Stole My Spot, Mocked Me Over Breakfast, Declared War, Then Saved Our Lives Before Breaking His Own Paw in the Chaos, and Taught Us All About Real Happiness

The tomcat slept with my wife. He pressed his furry back against her, stretching out all four paws to

La vida

012

Adam, I Don’t Want to Hurt You or Cause You Pain, My Dear

Adam, darling, the last thing I want is to hurt you or cause you pain. Adam was perched on the window

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010

I Agreed to Look After My Best Friend’s Child, Not Knowing the Child Was My Husband’s

I agreed to look after my best friends child, blissfully unaware that the father was my very own husband.