Apologies for Missing Your Party, I Had an Unexpected Accident Involving a Child

Simon, I’m really sorry I missed your birthday party that time. I hit a kid with my car, — Victor quickly downed a shot of whiskey. — I was working on a new housing development, got in my car, just started driving down the road, and suddenly this boy was on my bonnet.

Can you imagine? Thank goodness I wasn’t going fast.
I jumped out, checked to see if he was okay — and he was. Just a little redhead, about six years old.

“Where are your parents?” I asked.
“Mom’s at home,” he replied, “cooking dinner.”
“Right, let’s go to your mum,” I said. “We need to sort this out.”
He led me to his building, showed me the apartment door, then hid behind me. I rang the bell, and a woman answered. She was beautiful — more beautiful than any woman I’d seen before, though she seemed a bit… worn out. Her eyes didn’t light up, you know?

“I’m sorry to bother you,” I said, “but I accidentally hit your son with my car. He’s fine, he’s right here,” I said, pulling the boy out from behind me. “But maybe you’d like to call the police?”
“No need for the police,” she said quietly. “This is the fifth time he’s pulled this stunt.”
“What do you mean?”

“Marcus, go to your room,” she said sternly to her son. “Please, come into the kitchen. Would you like some tea or coffee?”
Her tea was lovely, by the way, with herbs in it.

“We apologize for the trouble,” said Emma, as she introduced herself. “Marcus overheard me mentioning to a friend how hard it is without their father around, and he’s been trying to find us a new dad by darting in front of cars. You’re at least the fifth man he’s done this to. Nearly gave two men heart attacks. I keep telling him he’s all I need, but he’s stubborn, takes after his granddad. If he got something in his head — it was done and dusted. Did he damage your car much? Maybe I should pay for the repairs? No? Well, okay then.”

As I sat there, looking at her, it hit me — I’d fallen for her. You wouldn’t believe it, Simon, but for the first time, I felt like the woman sitting across from me was the one. Tired, in a housecoat, no makeup. I knew that if I lost her, I’d be lost.
“I know how absurd this sounds,” I said, “but might I, as a sort of compensation, invite you and Marcus to the movies?”
“No need,” she replied. “You understand Marcus might get ideas again.”

“Do I not appeal to you?” I asked.
“It’s not that,” she said, “Just… in different circumstances… But I hate the thought of pushing my son in front of cars just to find a husband. It’s shameful.”
“Yeah. And I am a scoundrel, taking advantage of a woman in a tough situation,” I joked. “Looks like we both have a spot reserved in hell. But, if that’s the case, maybe we can share the same fire?”

I don’t recall what else I said, but the next day I picked them up, and we went to see “Transformers” at the movies. Later, we went to a restaurant. And… well, Simon, here’s why I really came over. Our wedding is in June. We need a photographer. Can you handle it? Look, aren’t they photogenic?”

Victor pulled out his phone and showed a picture of a laughing, red-haired beauty and the cheeky boy beside her.

I know for sure now that Cupid doesn’t have wings. Instead, he has lots of red freckles and is missing two baby teeth. His name is Marcus. And his last name… well, Victor will soon give him his, of that I’m sure.

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Apologies for Missing Your Party, I Had an Unexpected Accident Involving a Child