Helen, take her! I cant do this anymore! I cant even bear to touch her!
Liz was shaking, the baby bawling in her arms.
Helen gently lifted her niece, nodding. Alright. But this is your choiceyou wont regret this later, will you?
No, what regrets? Just take her. I dont want her!
The baby had only been born a month ago. Even before the birth, it was clear that something was wrong with Liz. Helen had blamed it on late-pregnancy moods. Liz had been widowed for over seven years; her older children were grown and living on their own. That whirlwind weekend in Brighton, a brief romance, and an unplanned pregnancy had shocked everyone. Liz had never been a spontaneous person. At first, she seemed delighted about the babyscouring shops for clothes and prams. But it wasnt long before Helen noticed Liz withdrawing entirely, as if hiding herself behind an invisible wall.
Right before the birth, Liz stopped speaking to anyoneno calls to her mother, her sister, not even her children. Alarmed, Helen tracked her down in the maternity ward, where Liz was about to relinquish parental rights.
Liz, what on earth is going on? Why? Helen pleaded.
I dont know. I feel nothing. Shes a stranger to me.
How can she be a stranger? Liz! Shes yours!
She wont be. Liz turned to face the wall.
Helen brought out the big gunstheir mother. It took some convincing, but Liz finally took the baby home. Their mother insisted Liz stay with her under the guise of helping, though everyone knew they were really there to keep an eye on her. Liz cared for her baby mechanically, never lingering near her daughter a moment longer than necessary. It was Nan who named the little one, and it was always Aunt Helen who cradled her.
Liz, Ill take her, said Helen softly. Ill raise her. But you realise, very soon, shell call me mum.
I dont care. Just as long as she doesnt call me that.
Within a week, all the paperwork was done. Helen became her nieces legal guardian. Liz vanished to another city.
Little Alice grew quicklya mischievous, giggling spark. She walked early, talked even earlier, and always called Helen Mum.
Twelve years went by.
Mum, I got three As today! And tomorrow our class is off to the cinema, Alices bright voice rang through the flat.
Is that her?
Yes, Liz, its her. Im asking you, please…
Hello! Im Alice. And you are?
There, in the kitchen doorway, stood a tall, wide-eyed girl, shifting her gaze from the woman at the table to her mum by the window, who had turned as pale as chalk.
Im… Im Liz. Im your mother, Alice.
I told you! Helen snapped at her sister, moving to her daughter. Alice! Ill explain everything!
Theres no need, Mum. Lets just listen. So, youre saying youre my mother. And?
Ive come for you. I want you to live with me.
Why?
Youre my daughter.
No, Im not. Ive got one mumright there. And I dont need another. Youre someone Im meeting for the firstand hopefully the lasttime. Alice turned away and left the kitchen.
Helen slumped heavily into a chair.
So what have you achieved?
Not yet, but I will. Ill fight for her, even in court if I must.
Why, Liz? You gave her up, you never wanted to see hernone of us understood. And now, after all these years, you think shell just fall into your arms? Please, Liz, go to Mums for now. Well talk later. I need to check on my daughter.
My niece! Liz shot back, standing.
Helen only sighed. She closed the door and went to Alices room.
Alice, sweetheart
Mum, wait. Before you start explaining, I want to say something. I know everything. Remember last year, when we were cleaning Grans attic? I found the guardianship papers. At first I was furious you both hadnt told me. Later, I wanted to meet her and ask why. But eventually I realised I didnt need any of that. Youre my mum. I dont want another.
Alice, my girl, Ill never give you up.
I wouldnt let you if you tried, Alice laughed. Remember my friend Tom from school? His mums a solicitorshes brilliant at family law.
Hold on, Alice, dont grow up all at once! Deciding everything so quickly! For now, Ill be the grown-up and the mum, if you dont mind. Helen laughed too, hugging her daughter. Well call Toms mum, of course. Well sort it all out.
The following months were fraught with tension, official arguments and tears, but the court left everything unchanged. Alices wishes were taken seriously: she refused absolutely to live with her birth mother or recognise her as mum.
Outside the court, the sisters stood together, the ruling finally behind them.
Its over. At last, this nightmare is done, Helen exhaled, relief shaking her voice. What will you do now?
Ill leave, Helen. I dont want to interfere. But Ill support youdont say no. Theres already a trust set up for Alice, the papers are with Mum.
Why all of this, Liz? And why did you leave her in the first place?
There was no romance, Helennothing pleasant. It was a dark park, late at night.
Helens breath caught.
You never said… All these years, you kept it in?
There was no fixing it. Thats why I kept quiet. I didnt even know I was pregnant at first; I thought it was just early menopause. Later, it was too late. Please, dont tell Alice. She doesnt need my storyits her life now. Maybe one day shell forgive me.
Helen hugged her sister. Together, they turned to look at Alice, who was waiting outside with her grandmother.
Sometimes, the most terrible things can give way to something truly beautiful. Shes such a beautiful girl, Liz whispered, wiping away tears. For the first time in many years, Helen saw her sisters face break into a gentle smile.
