The Crystal Kitten
Three sisters at the window
Mum, is that like you and your sisters?
Sarah let out a long sigh.
Nearly. Now, are you actually going to sleep tonight? Ive got work to finish and youll be yawning your head off tomorrow at the party.
Oh! Alright, Im sleeping! Polly dove beneath the duvet, but then poked her little button nose out again. Will there be balloons? Is Millie coming? And
Sarah wrapped her up tight, covering her in kisses, ignoring her squeals of protest.
Off to sleep, you! Youll see everything tomorrow!
She handed Polly her favourite teddy and left the room, switching on the nightlight as she went. Polly still didnt like sleeping in the dark, and Sarah was always careful to keep a light on somewhere in the house.
Sarah headed downstairs, quietly closed the kitchen door, and switched on her laptop. There was a mountain of work waiting, but she allowed herself a few moments in the calm house, drawing her thoughts together. Tomorrow was going to be a long day. It wasnt just that it was Pollys birthday and there was so much to arrangeSarah enjoyed planning parties, especially when it was for her daughter. But tomorrow, the relatives were all coming, and that was another matter. Sarah shook her head firmly and put the kettle on. Theres no sense worrying in advance: solve problems as they come. The most urgent was the year-end report and that wasnt going to wait. She set her tea beside the laptop and pulled out a folder from her bag. She was glad shed listened to her grandmother and become an accountant rather than following dreams of oceanography. The latter might have been more romantic, but wouldnt have given her this quiet certainty about the future. For a moment, Sarah closed her eyes, picturing the sea, then smiled at the thought of their upcoming holidayjust a bit longer to wait. Assuming nothing else cropped up.
Sarah was born into the Hardy family, the long-awaited child of Linda and William Hardy. Both grandmothers were ecstatic, her parents delighted beyond measure with their rosy-cheeked little girl.
You must have another soon, so shell have a friend! the grandmothers insisted, and Linda agreed.
There was hardly a gap between Sarah and her younger sister, Naomi. Best friends in childhood, always a little competitive but equally happy for each others successes. Linda made sure there were no squabbles, often reminding the girls that no one in the world could ever mean more to them than each other. She persuaded the headteacher to put them in the same class. Sitting side-by-side on their first day, their new shoes lightly touched under the desk, a tiny reassurance: Im here, dont be nervous!
Sarah, the more responsible one, worried over every little thing. Naomi was more free-spirited, sometimes leaving homework half-finished to gaze out the window and watch birds. But Sarah was methodical: she never left her desk until every last sum was right.
Sarah! Youve finished your maths, havent you? Let me copy it and we can go out!
Do it yourself! Sarah would snatch her book back. If Mrs Green swaps our seats again in the test, youll be stuck. Shall I help you understand it properly?
Naomi would grumble and sulk, but never for longsoon enough shed be dragging Sarah to the ice rink or off to feed the ducks.
It was when they were in Year 6 that their little sister, Lucy, was born. Linda hadnt planned on a third child and was less than thrilled at the prospect.
Oh, not again! William, Im not as young as I was, this will be hard.
Dearest, youve got two helpers now, and Im here too. Maybe itll be a boyimagine the surprise!
The surprise turned out to be another daughter. Lucy, loud and insistent, utterly unlike her older sisters, threw Linda off balance at first. But in time, Sarah and Naomi realised Lucy had become the centre of the family.
Linda quickly noticed the difference between those early days and this later chance at motherhood. She found joy in caring for Lucy, but started to forget about her older daughtersshe sent them on endless errands, showing little interest in their lives. Thats how a certain black cat slipped between the sisters.
The cat was actually Simon, a boy from the neighbouring estate, and the sisters never gave him a thoughtuntil Sarah turned sixteen. One day, rushing home from hockey practice, Simon cornered her in the square.
Sarah, wait, I need to say something! He hesitated under her steady grey gaze, searching for words.
After a moment, she smiled gently. Im in a hurry. Mums waiting. By six oclock, outside.
A huge grin spread across Simons face.
I like you, Sarah!
So Ive gathered, she laughed, the sound ringing clear under the lime trees, and then she dashed off.
Who could she tell about the rush of feelings? That fluttery joy when a boy, a stranger until recently, suddenly became hers. That nervous first date when you dont know what to do with your hands, the fear and sweetness of a first kiss Of course, Sarah told Naomi, though not straight away. Naomi noticed something was up and pestered her until she confessed.
Afterwards, Naomi couldnt say what got into her, why she suddenly wanted Simons attention, when shed never liked him before. Now, though, it became the most important thing.
Sarah didnt understand, and by the time she did, it was too late. She walked past Simon and Naomi kissing under the old oak, saying nothing. At home, Sarah locked her door, ignoring Lucys indignant cries in the hallway.
Sarah! Whats this nonsense?! Let your sister in, now! Linda rapped angrily at the door.
Sarah had always been so obedient. She opened the door for her mother, but when Linda saw her eldest daughter, her heart skipped a beat: for the first time, she saw the abyss in someones eyes. Gently, she nudged Lucy back and closed the door.
Sweetheart, what happened? Talk to me, please.
Mum, it hurts. Sarah hugged herself. Why would Naomi do that to me?
Once she understood, Linda put her arms around Sarah.
My darling… What can I do?
Sarah stared dry-eyed out the window in silence. How do you explain that kind of pain? There are no words.
Help me pack, Mum. I want to stay with Grandma a while. I cant be here anymore.
Naomi, flushed from skating, burst in just as Sarah was leaving with her suitcase.
Off somewhere, are you?
Sarah pushed past her in silence, not looking back. Linda, wiping away tears, smacked Naomi across the cheek.
How could you!
Naomi clutched her cheek as her mother stormed out with Lucy, slamming the door so hard the crystal chandelier in the sitting room jingled mournfully.
Nobody in the Hardy family ever managed to stay cross for long. After a couple of weeks, Linda started speaking to Naomi again, but Sarah needed two years before she could talk to her sister. Perhaps she wouldnt have done so if Linda hadnt fallen illthen, the sisters came together to fight off their mothers illness.
Im so sorry, Naomi muttered, staring at her shaking hands, unable to make a fist.
They were waiting in the hospital garden for the surgery to finish.
Lets leave the past in the past, Sarah said quietly.
Naomi realised forgiveness had come, but the memory would never go away.
She tentatively squeezed Sarahs thin wrist, surprised her fingers obeyed her at last. Sarah didnt pull away, nor did she respondthey simply sat side-by-side for hours until their father emerged to say it was over and all would be well now.
The sisters juggled their time, Sarah coming several times a week to help their mother and look after Lucy. It was then she realised how headstrong Lucy wasthere were no authorities for Lucy, she simply did as she pleased. Neither sisters nor parents could do anything with her.
Linda recovered and life again pulled the sisters in different directions. Sarah moved to another city to care for her paternal grandmother and ended up staying. Granny Olive died a year later, leaving Sarah a spacious flat.
Make yourself at home, dear. Build your life. And always trust your own judgement. Even the closest people can put their own interests first sometimes.
Sarah gave a wry smile. She knew that better than anyone, but didnt share her story.
A couple of years on, Sarah quietly married Andrewno guests, not really a wedding at all, just a quiet trip to the registry office and a modest celebration for two. Andrew had no family, and Sarah chose not to invite hers.
Their marriage was peaceful and content, marred only by the lack of children. Both longed for a baby, but it wasnt to be, and the doctors were baffledno explanation found.
Well wait, Sarah resolved, unwavering.
The years passed without change. They considered adopting, though fate had its own plans.
Sarahs contact with her family was limited to letters and birthday cards. She and Andrew visited Linda and William a couple of times, but the family didnt take to Andrew. Sarah put a stop to any interference.
I chose him, Mum. Youll have to accept it.
I know, darling. Its just… You, with your education, your opportunities, your beautyyour life could have been so different.
Sarah never found words to explain that Andrew was perfect for her. Though she was now head accountant for a large company, and Andrew was a driver, they never concerned themselves with who wore the trousersthey were happy together, and Andrew was always by her side. He nursed her through illness, helped at home, never thought it beneath him to cook or do the washing up.
Lucky you, getting a man like that! Naomi sighed, chasing her eldest boy while carrying her youngest girl. I have to do everything alone. All my husband does is complain.
Sarah ignored her sisters gripes, knowing Naomi was happy really. Lucy, however, was another story.
Lucy grew into a beauty, far surpassing her sisters. Lucys a real queen! Linda boasted, as Lucy lounged in the armchair, watching her sisters lay the table for their parents anniversary party. Lucy hated such gatheringsshed put in an appearance, collect compliments, and then vanish, seemingly oblivious to her parents disappointment.
After finishing school, Lucy announced:
Im going to be a model!
She overlooked how much hard work it actually entailed, and soon tired of the relentless schedule. After meeting a well-off businessman, Lucy didnt care that he was married with childrenshe moved into the flat he rented for her.
Her mothers attempts to interfere were sharply rebuffed:
Stay out of it if you want any contact at all. Ill live as I choose!
Lucy wanted much but got little. Trying to tie her lover to her, she became pregnant, but failed to realise that the dream might end thereand so it did. Lucy argued, accused, even tried to open the wifes eyes. But the wife merely looked her up and down and sniffed:
Dear, youre not the first and you wont be the last. I am his wife. Hell never leave me.
Bit sure of yourself, arent you? Lucy scowled. The woman didnt have beauty, so where did that assurance come from? It wasnt arrogance, Lucy realised, but something elsesomething she couldnt grasp.
Quite. Youre not the first to come complaining. How naïve. You think his other women dont have children? He supports them as he sees fit, but hes married to me. Have your baby if you want, but dont expect anything. Im speaking as a solicitor.
That ended the conversation. Furious, Lucy stormed around, waiting for her lover, but his arrival shattered her hopes:
Sort yourself out. Youll get maintenance and the flat. I wont be seeing you again. The child is your responsibility, not mine. Try to come to my house and thats it. Im done.
Lucy stared at the closed door, stunned that things had turned out this way for her, when shed always got what she wanted. Now she had nothing.
Caught up in all this, she missed her dates and the baby arrivedPolly. From the first days, it was Linda who cared for her granddaughter while Lucys moods ricocheted from obsessive mothering to days-long absences. Linda struggled to manage things, and soon tragedy struck: Lucy died in a high-speed joyride after a late-night party.
Linda was broken by the loss, lost all will to care for Polly. William tried to cope, and even asked Naomi for help.
I have my hands full, Dad, I cant take on another!
William called Sarah.
She didnt hesitate. She took leave from work, came at once, and within a month had all the paperwork sorted to take Polly home. Only Sarahs parents and Naomi knew Polly was her niece, not her daughter. While Sarah was arranging everything, Andrew sold their flat and finished renovating their new house.
Andrew, youre amazing! Everything just as I dreamed! Sarah wandered round, feeling their life would now truly begin.
Little Polly brought the sunshine theyd missedlively and bright as a bell, she filled their life with joy. Nine years vanished in the blink of an eye.
All that time, Sarah kept family contact to a minimum, gathering only for holidays and feeling scrutinised like an insect under a lens on such occasions. Linda, consumed by grief, was often unbearable.
You were entrusted with her! Ill be watching! You took her away Living near us would have been better!
Sarah ignored Lindas complaints, feeling only pityshe understood, sadly, that no other daughters loss would have hit her mother so hard. Lucy was different.
Linda would watch Polly, so much like her mother, and soften.
Shes growing up such a beauty! Linda bristled with pride and gave Sarah a stern look. Dont stifle her, let her be happy!
Sarah would squeeze Andrews hand, a silent plea for him not to retort.
Leave it, shed whisper, and the storm would die before it began.
But, Sarah, wouldnt it be best to clear the air?
I dont know, Andrew. Mums angry, but its all from grief.
Why do you have to put up with it?
Maybe because theres no one else left to do so.
What if she says something to Polly?
I dont think she would. Shed never hurt Lucys child.
Sarah was right. Linda poured her bitterness onto Sarah but was stone-faced when it came to her granddaughter. She saw Pollys happiness and, though she bristled that the girl called Sarah Mum, said nothing, knowing the truth would only hurt Polly.
Sarah closed her laptop and stretched. Past midnight already! She drained her cold tea and stood by the window. How she wished Andrew were homehis business trip couldnt have come at a worse time, but hed be back tomorrow. He might not make it for the party, but hed be home by evening. What had he bought for Polly? A surprise, that much was certainhed only laughed and said:
Wait and see. Youll both love it.
Sarah smiled, grateful once more for her good fortune, and finally went to bed.
Mummy! Happy birthday to me! Polly catapulted onto the bed, smothering Sarah in kisses. And to you! Congratulations on having me!
Thank you! Sarah hugged her Happy birthday, darling! Be healthy and happy, always!
Polly snuggled close, nuzzling into Sarahs neck.
Am I a big girl now?
Absolutely! Ten years old! But you know what?
What?
To me, youre still a little bit little, Sarah grinned, and Polly giggled.
Good! Everyone loves little girls!
And who doesnt love you?
Sarah tickled her until Polly shrieked and wriggled away.
Alright! Time for presents! Sarah opened the bedside drawer. Ive got something for you.
She handed Polly a small jewellery box.
Be careful.
Polly opened the box and peered inside.
Mum She gazed up, smiling warmly. Is this really it?
It is.
Polly carefully lifted out the tiny glass kitten, the same one William had given Sarah.
For his eldest daughter Was that what Granddad said?
Just so.
Thank you! I hoped one day it could be mine! Polly stroked the kittens little ears. But Im your only daughter
Sarah smiled. Polly searched her face.
Really? Her whisper was almost silent. Sarah nodded. In a flash, Polly leapt up, kitten squeezed in her fist, and yelled: Im going to be a big sister! Mum, really?
Well see, sweetheart.
Sarah watched Polly bouncing around the room, and found tears on her cheeks. After so many years.
Polly froze mid-leap, turned to Sarah, and said,
Thats the best present you could ever give me!
Sarah stood, letting the duvet fall to the floor.
Polly skipped about as Sarah produced a large box from the wardrobe.
This is for you, too.
The pretty dress inside left Polly speechless. Twirling before the mirror, she asked,
Mum, when will everyone get here?
Sarah glanced at the clock and gasped.
Weve overslept! Well have to hurry, love.
They made it, just in time for lunch. Polly, resplendent in her new frock, greeted all the guests with her happy laughter ringing through the house.
How are things? Linda asked, sinking tiredly into an armchair, fixing Sarah with a look.
All fine, Mum. Polly had a great year at schooltop marks, and excelling in music, too. Shes a joy.
Never forget to be thankful for the gifts youre given.
Sarah sighed. Conversation with her mother was becoming ever more strained. Fortunately, Naomi appeared and changed the subject, talking about her own childrenher eldest, Millie, had finished the year with top marks too, and Victor was boxing champion at school.
Suddenly, Pollys loud cry rang out, and Sarah rushed to the childrens room. She found Polly sobbing in the middle of the rug, her white dress ruined with stains.
Naomi! First aid box, now! Its on top of the fridge! Get the bandages!
Everyone started bustling about, except Millie, who sat quietly in the corner, glowering at Polly.
Polly, dearest, what happened?
Its all lies! Shes lying! Lying!
Whos lying? Sarah, bewildered, tried to piece things together.
The cuts on Pollys hands werent deep. After bandaging her and getting her changed, Sarah sat her on her knee.
Will you tell me what happened?
For a while Polly was silent, her face buried in Sarahs chest. Then she looked up, her grey eyesso like Sarahs ownbrimming.
Writing this, I realise how hard childhood and family can behow jealousy, hurt, joy and hope can twist us into knots. But today, as I look at Polly laughing through her tears, clinging to her crystal kitten, I know with all my heart: nothing matters more than choosing kindness, and never shutting the door on those who need you most. Thats the truest lesson life has taught me.
