Socks
Oh, you are just the sweetest! My little darling! Margaret cooed at her grandson, beaming proudly into the camera.
Little Williams six-month milestone was being celebrated with all the pomp of a royal garden party. Entertainers, balloons, a towering cakehis grandparents had pulled out all the stops. Hannah, Williams mum, hadnt been overly keen on such an elaborate do. Of course, she appreciated her parents efforts to make the day special, but just like when she was a child, the bustle wore her out quickly. Clearly, the apple hadnt fallen far from the tree, because within half an hour, William had started wailing and Hannah had to whisk him indoors. She drew the curtains and settled into the armchair, her son snuggled close, and soon enough, he drifted off to sleep.
Oh, my poor love. Youre much too young for all this nonsense.
Margaret came up to the nursery, holding the present she’d picked out for William.
Asleep already?
Hes worn out, Mum. I told you this would be too much for him, Hannah murmured.
Dont worry so much, sweetheart. Hell get used to it! We can afford a bit of a celebration for our grandchild. We waited long enough for him! Just look what I boughtarent they adorable?
The rustling tissue paper disturbed William, who started to fuss in his sleep.
Mum, can we do this later, please? Hannah got up and gently rocked him around the room.
Oh, honestly! I spent ages choosing this and youre not even a little bit interested! Margaret huffed, placing the gift on the table.
Hannah smiled, trying to keep the peace. I really am grateful, Mum! And Im sure its a wonderful present. Could you be an angel and get me a glass of water? Im parched.
Well, put William down and come down with me, then.
Hell wake up.
And if he does, its not the end of the world! Come on, the partys still going!
Mum, if he wakes now, hell scream for hours. Not ideal, is it?
Hannah, you need to toughen him up from the start. Well-behaved children dont cry!
Hannah stiffened for a moment but then continued her gentle swayshed been taught to keep her back straight, chin up, always poised. Good girls were perfect at all timesnever object, never challenge.
Im going back to the guests. Try to put him down and join us soon. Its hardly right, the party carrying on without the hostess.
Would you mind covering for me, Mum?
Margaret swept off downstairs. Hannah sat back, William pressed against her heart, thinking about what shed had to overcome to bring her son into the world.
She came from a proper English family. Her grandfather had been a knighted academic, her grandmother the lead surgeon at a renowned London hospital. Her father had followed suit and become a doctor too. What always puzzled Hannah was how such a decisive man became so pliable in her mothers hands. Margaret had never cared much for intellectual pursuits. She barely scraped through university before shelving her diploma and promptly began the searchfor a husband for her daughter, that is, spurred on by her own formidable mother. Lady Edith orchestrated Margarets marriage to Charles at a gala, the family gathering as smooth as buttered scones. Within two years, Hannah was born, and from that moment, her grandmother took charge, handpicking nannies and filling her calendar with what she considered appropriate pursuitsFrench, ballet, music lessons with a private tutor.
A child must be perfect in every way! Lady Edith had declared more than once.
Weekends meant museums and the theatre, always under the stern eye of her grandmother. Her parents were mostly absenther father with his patients, her mother flitting from one social do to the next.
Lady Ediths diligence paid off: Hannah was accepted into both ballet school and, later, a prestigious London theatre company. Her career was taking off when she met her future husband, James. To everyone except her father, he immediately seemed unsuitable.
What on earth is she thinking? Lady Edith would lament, massaging her temples. Hannah, think! What are you doing with that rough fellow? He can barely string a sentence together!
Granny, no one can, beside you, Hannah said softly, curled up in the armchair in a way her grandmother would normally scold. But Ediths mind was hardly on manners just then.
Whats that meant to imply? Edith looked at her over the rim of her glasses.
It means you set the bar impossibly high, Granny.
A look of suspicion flickered across her grandmothers face.
And besides, I dont just like James. I love him, Granny. And isnt love what inspires the arts?
Oh, stuff the arts! How are you planning to live with him?
For a long time, I hope. And happily, if Im lucky.
With much drama and endless appeals to come to her senses, Hannah held her ground. She looked into Jamess eyes and said yes, shutting down all further protest. For him, Hannah was almost otherworldly: delicate, gentle, yet with a surprising inner steel. He felt a fierce need to wrap her in his arms and shield her from everything.
I cant promise you much, hed said, but no one will love you quite like I do.
And that was enough. For the first time, Hannah knew she was loved for who she wasnot for being perfect or proper or meeting expectations.
Their life together wasnt easy. James had no help, no titled relations. His father had died when he was young, and his mum, SusanMrs. Susan Wattshad worked as a primary school teacher and then as deputy head. The children adored her; so did her son. Susans steadfast belief in James saw him through Oxford, which he left with flying colours. She downsized to help him start his own business, which quickly grew, and by the time William arrived, had become one of the top firms in the city. Even the indomitable Lady Edith had to give James his due, especially after her great-grandson was born.
Hannah wanted a baby with everything she had. She didnt want to be great or remembered in the papersshe wanted a family, the ordinary kind of happiness. But as the years ticked by and nothing happened, she began to wonder if perhaps shed drawn the short straw. She went through every possible test, two operations, heartbreak and tears hidden from James, because she didnt want him to feel robbed of fatherhood. Eventually, she told him he deserved to become a dadand burst out crying when he just laughed.
Oh, Hannah! he said, pulling her close. You daft thing. Did you honestly think being together was just about having a child? Youre everything to me! Cant you see that?
They both crieda mixture of loss and relief.
Knowing she might never be a mother was one thing. Accepting it was altogether another. It didnt help that Margaret always made pointed remarks: All my friends are grandmothers now, and Im still acting the carefree young thing! Friends invited Hannah to childrens parties, and shed shop for presents with a bittersweet ache. But gradually, time soothed the longing, and she filled her days opening a ballet school.
I need somethingor Ill go mad! shed laugh.
James didnt quite understand, but Susan did.
James, love, you havent the foggiest how hard it is for her. She wants to give you a child more than anything. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is just listen and help how you can.
He took her advice, found a beautiful studio, and Hannahs light returned. Setting up classes, running the schoolit all kept her busy. She would have missed the early signs of pregnancy but for Susan, who one day watched her closely over tea in their favourite café.
Im going to ask you something, Hannah, and you can just ignore me if you like Susan said, then after a pause, Are you expecting?
Hannahs heart dropped. She wanted to lash outbut before she could, a wave of nausea and dizziness nearly floored her. Susan quickly ordered some water and handed Hannah a little box.
Might as well find out, eh?
The waiter watched in fascination as a few minutes later both women erupted in tears and laughter, hugging and swaying. Their joy was so infectious, even other customers cheered them on.
William was born healthy and strongafter giving the doctors a good run for their money.
Was his mum a ballet dancer? the consultant asked, amused.
Yes, indeed.
Well, hes going to keep you on your toes.
Now, every morning, Hannah woke up so overwhelmed with happiness, she was almost afraid.
Youre not alone, love. Share it with metheres two of us now, James murmured, gazing into their babys face, peeking out from the intricate lace blanket Margaret had picked out for him.
Coming home from hospital felt like a nightmarephotographers everywhere, relatives jostling at the door, a table groaning with food. Hannah, aching and exhausted, wanted nothing more than a hot shower.
Mum, is all this really necessary?
Margaret looked genuinely perplexed. But darling, its a celebration! Its what you do! Ive never been so happy.
Realising it was an argument she couldnt win, Hannah trudged up the steps, disheartened to find even more people waiting in her living room.
Darling, theyre family!
She caught a sympathetic look from Susan, hovering in the hallway. Eventually, Susan stepped in.
If you dont mind, Im going to steal Hannah and William for a moment. We need a private word.
She whisked Hannah off to the bedroom.
Lie down. Ill get you something to eat. Hungry?
Hannah just nodded, watching as James wrapped William snuggly in his crib. She worried, I should go back downstairs
Says who? Susan scowled. Theyll be fine without you. Youve done your ten minutes.
Relieved, Hannah let herself drift off, waking only an hour later to the familiar baby sounds and the muffled laughter of guests. After feeding William, she finally got her much-longed-for shower and sat by the window with a bowl of hot soup, courtesy of Susan, who was full of practical advice.
I know they showed me some things at the hospital, but its all rather daunting, Hannah admitted.
Susan smiled. Eat up, love. Babies are tougher than they look, and you already know best what your little one needseven if you dont believe it yourself yet. Trust your instincts; no one gets it right all the time.
Time proved Susan right. Hannah soon found her feet, her worries never quite vanished, but she became infinitely more confident.
Those first six months flew by. Susan would come by a couple of times a week, always helping with the house as much as with William, reassuring Hannah: This time is so shortmake the most of every first smile.
Margaret visited less often, but her every appearance was still a little event.
Hannah, look at this pramits simply marvellous!
But ours is beautiful, Mum!
Nonsense! Come on, lets take it for a spin!
About the name, Margaret had strong opinions: Where did you come up with William? Honestly. So ordinary!
Mum, its a classicroyal, even!
Well, hes the one wholl have to live with it! Hell get teased at school!
Then well manage. And frankly, Mum, naming your child is meant for the parents.
Margaret would just huff, gather up William and parade off for her strolls, loving the approving glances from passersby mistaking him for her own baby. Once the neighbours caught on, those walks ended; instead, she became granny who brings presents, a new toy at each visit.
Everyone settled into their roles, and peace more or less returned. Margarets extravagant party for Williams half-birthday almost caused uproar, but now Hannah could laugh about it with Susan, especially as she opened Margarets silver rattle, which had William giggling with delight.
And what did Granny Susan give you? Hannah asked, pulling out a parcel Susan had left. Inside was a beautifully soft white romper, hand-knitted with the cosiest little socks.
Oh, William, look! Your Grannys a real craftsman! Hannah beamed.
Margaret, overhearing, burst in.
Oh, how lovely! Is it from a designer shop?
No, Mum, Susan knitted it herself, Hannah replied with quiet pride.
Margaret examined the little jumper dubiously. Honestly, couldnt she think of a more exciting present? Its a special day. Some people are just so tight-fisted. I cant believe it.
Mum!
What? Am I wrong?
Hannah glanced over at Susan, standing silent in the doorway, having heard everything. She just smiled, set a glass of berries cordial down for Hannah, and slipped quietly away. Hannah didnt manage to catch up with her before shed left the house, and felt mortified.
James, this is awfulIm so embarrassed.
But you didnt say it. Have a cup of tea and let it go.
But I shouldve nipped it in the bud!
Dont fret. Mums not daftshell be all right.
Hannah longed to smooth things over, but Susan kept gently brushing it off: Honestly, Hannah, its not worth your worry. Im not the least bit upset.
Still, Hannah felt a rift she desperately wanted to mend.
Not too long after, Hannah found herself in terrible pain one afternoon, just her and William at home. Jamess phone went unanswered, likely busy at work; her dad was in surgery, so she tried her mother, but Margaret was cheerily chatting about the party and then quickly switched lines.
Hannahs panic grew. She called an ambulance, then Susan.
In trouble please was all Hannah managed before the world went blurry.
Susan, in her slippers, grabbed her keys and dashed to the roadside, practically flinging herself in front of a taxi.
Oi, lovetrying to get yourself run over? the driver snapped.
My daughter-in-laws ill. Pleasetake me, quickly!
Hop in!
Moments after the ambulance arrived at Hannahs house, Susan pulled up behind it, racing out to help. Hannah was soon on her way to hospital, reassured as Susan promised, Ill look after WilliamJames is on his way.
The operation went well; two weeks later Hannah was finally home. She rang her mother.
Mum, I need helpI need you to stay for a bit while I recover.
There was an awkward pause before Margaret replied, Oh, darling Id love to, but Ive already booked a flight for my holidaynon-refundable ticket, Im afraid. I was so looking forward to it
Hannah hung up, blinking back tears. She knew shed have to manage on her own. But then she awoke to Susan pottering about, William cradled in her arms.
You hungry? Ive made soup and your favourite cheese scones, Susan said, smiling. If you dont mind, Ill stay with you a couple of weeks, until youre properly back on your feet.
Hannah burst into tears.
There nowcome on, chin up, girl. You need positive vibes. Look what Ive got to show you
Susan put William on the floor and carefully let go of his handsand, with wobbling steps, he toddled toward Hannah. Her tears vanished instantly. She scooped him up, meeting Susans warm gaze.
There you arepositive vibes, Susan chuckled. Now off to the tabletheres food ready. Youll need all the strength you can get, because once that little man isnt just walking but running, youre going to need to keep up!So Hannah sat down by the window, sun streaming in, the scent of fresh scones curling through the kitchen. William, triumphant and giggling, clung to her knee. Susan, humming softly, poured out cups of tea, her own knitted socks peeking beneath her sensible trousers.
For a moment, there was only warmth: hands clasping, laughter weaving through the room, the world outside made small and unimportant.
Hannah realized thenfamily was never about the perfect names, the grand gestures, the silver rattles or designer prams. It was in these gentle, everyday gifts: soup ladled with care, stitches knit through sleepless nights, arms ready to catch a childs uncertain steps.
William tugged one sock off, waving it proudly, and Susan roared with laughter. Hes quick, that one! Hell have his toes in the grass before you know it.
Hannah grinned, her heart full. She reached for Susans hand, squeezed it tightly, and whispered, Thank you.
Susan only nodded, her eyes shining. We take care of our own, love. Always have, always will.
And as the three of them sat together in the soft golden light, Hannah knew this was what shed always longed fornot perfection, but belonging. The proud and proper voices of yesterday faded quietly away, leaving behind only the real, muddled, joyful now: a sockless baby, a pot of tea, and the promise that, no matter what happened next, they would never walk alone.
