After our son married, he no longer wished to visit us. His life revolved around his mother-in-law, who always seemed to require urgent assistance, although I still wonder how she managed before her daughter wed our son.
Our son has been married for more than two years. After their wedding, the newlyweds moved into a flat wed bought for him when he started university. From childhood, wed always given him our support and understanding. Hed lived independently even before marrying, as his flat was close to his workplace.
I cant say I ever disliked my daughter-in-law; rather, I felt that the young woman simply wasnt prepared for married life. Though our son was only two years older than her, she often acted as a child wouldsometimes quite demanding. Our son was always kind-hearted, and I worried how he would fare in life with such a childish partner.
After meeting her and her mother, I understood more about them. Despite the fact that my sons mother-in-law was the same age as me, she behaved like a child herself. Perhaps youve met people who, in their later years, carry on with a childs helplessness? Such folk are very immature and cannot manage much for themselves. By the time their daughter married our son, her mother had already been divorced six times.
There was little common ground between uswe had nothing to talk about, since she lived very much in her own world. Still, she didnt force herself upon us, and our communication was cordial but brief, limited to exchanging congratulations at the wedding.
The first signs of trouble appeared before the wedding. Our daughter-in-law would often drag our son over to her mothers house for helpbe it a dripping tap, a switch needing replacement, or a fallen kitchen shelf. At first I thought, well, theres no man about the house, so his help would surely be welcome.
Yet, as time went on, the number of mishaps at his mother-in-laws never decreased. Our son continued to neglect us, always explaining that he and his wife were needed at her mothers flat. Soon, they began spending every holiday there, leaving our home with just me, my husband, and my own mother-in-law.
It hurt deeply when our son stopped attending family celebrations, but what pained me most was when he started ignoring our requests for help.
Around this time, we purchased a new refrigerator and asked our son to help bring it home. He agreed, but later called to say they were off to his mother-in-laws as her washing machine was leaking.
When my wife rang our son, she overheard our daughter-in-law saying, Couldnt your parents hire a moving company? Our son eventually arrived, but he was visibly annoyed.
Dad, couldnt you have called movers? Now Ive got to lug this myself!
I lost heart, confused as to why his mother-in-law couldnt simply hire a professional. Did she live in a world devoid of skilled workers? My son insisted she needed help, claiming that tradesmen were always cheating her, taking money but never fixing things properly.
My husband finally snapped and remarked that, perhaps, our sons mother-in-law had no clue about appliances, but did know quite well how to shepherd a sheepshes a master at leading one around. Our son took offense, stormed out, and hasnt spoken to his father for over a fortnight. My husband refused to make amends, and I felt caught between the hammer and the anvil. Though I agreed with my husband, I wish hed spoken more gentlynow our son is hurt and doesnt want to see his father, and I dread losing him over something so trivial.
Neither side seems willing to give in. My husband wont contact our son, and our son insists he wont speak to his father until he receives an apology. Meanwhile, the only person thriving in all this is the mother-in-law.
